# Misogyny on the SDMB, Sept. 2018 edition

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899>\
**Category:** About This Message Board\
**Created:** [September 25, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899 "2018-09-25T17:45:19Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/1 "2018-09-25T17:45:19Z")

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This subject has come up many times before on the SDMB, hence the subject title.

This is obviously an issue for many people here. While previous discussions have had a tendency to go around and around with no resolution, some productive things have come out of those discussions, and hopefully something productive can come out of this one as well.

From my point of view, I have seen changes. There have been several actions taken by moderators with respect to misogynistic posts in GQ. I have no idea about many of the other forums since I do not frequent those. Let us know how we are doing all over the board, and what you think needs to improve.

Unlike other threads, this discussion is wide open. Anything related to misogyny here on the SDMB may be discussed here.

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**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/2 "2018-09-25T17:48:49Z")

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**Moderator Note**

This post was originally made in the Kavanaugh / Elections thread here:  
[https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=862797](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=862797)

Since the post is in reference to misogyny and moderation in general and has nothing to do with the Kavanaugh / Elections issue specifically, it has been moved here. It shows up first in the thread due to posts being displayed in chronological order, even though it was made prior to the creation of this thread.

> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/822116/1):
>
> If only there was this much mod direction in the offensive threads in question. Nope, freewheeling say any foul thing.
> 
> Ugh. It’s so clear that there is never going to be any improvement. It’s all just too hard, every discussion ends the same way, mods throw their arms in the air and announce, ‘Well what can we do?’
> 
> And yes, our voices are clearly being silenced. Anyone ever see a thread with quite this much specific direction on what is ‘acceptable’ to discuss? I can’t recall one. Two moderation chastisements in the first four posts? Not reaction, preemptive! You’re joking, right?
> 
> Since the moderation for misogyny is apparently beyond the mod skill set, why not offer us a misogyny free forum of our own. So, Y’know, the bros can still be free to shit up ALL the rest of the board without interference.
> 
> Maybe, if it WAS a forum specific rule then you’d all be willing to actually mod for misogyny.

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**Author:** ![engineer\_comp\_geek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/engineer_comp_geek/32/504_2.png) [@engineer\_comp\_geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/engineer_comp_geek)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/3 "2018-09-25T17:54:22Z")

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> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/822116/1):
>
> Ugh. It’s so clear that there is never going to be any improvement. It’s all just too hard, every discussion ends the same way, mods throw their arms in the air and announce, ‘Well what can we do?’

If you have any specific suggestions on what we should do, please post them here.

> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/822116/1):
>
> Since the moderation for misogyny is apparently beyond the mod skill set, why not offer us a misogyny free forum of our own. So, Y’know, the bros can still be free to shit up ALL the rest of the board without interference.

This suggestion seems like more of a dig at the current moderation, but if there actually is enough interest in a “misogyny free” forum or a forum specifically for women, then perhaps we can create one. Anyone interested in this, please feel free to discuss.

> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/822116/1):
>
> Maybe, if it WAS a forum specific rule then you’d all be willing to actually mod for misogyny.

Feel free to discuss any rule changes as well. Maybe start with a proposed rule change, as in spell out exactly what you would want this rule to say.

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**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/4 "2018-09-25T18:05:03Z")

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> [@On another topic](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/822116/1):
>
> If only there was this much mod direction in the offensive threads in question. Nope, freewheeling say any foul thing.

Have you considered the nerdish misandry of the Dope? Men being automatically in the wrong? Women being on pedestals? Women demanding they be put on pedestals?

Two wrongs don’t make a right, but consider this: seeing people make misandrist and misogynist comments allows you to know that they are misandrist or misogynist.

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**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/5 "2018-09-25T18:20:50Z")

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> [@Quartz](#):
>
> seeing people make misandrist and misogynist comments allows you to know that they are misandrist or misogynist.

Yes, it most certainly does.

Everybody knows who’s on that list.

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**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/6 "2018-09-25T18:25:13Z")

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> [@Quartz](#):
>
> Have you considered the nerdish misandry of the Dope? Men being automatically in the wrong? Women being on pedestals? Women demanding they be put on pedestals?

Don’t really see it, so there isn’t really anything to consider as far as I’m concerned.

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**Author:** ![RobDog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f07891/32.png) [@RobDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RobDog)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/7 "2018-09-25T18:40:25Z")

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Didn’t Nerdish Misandry win the 1993 Man Booker Prize?

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**Author:** ![Bone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bone/32/407_2.png) [@Bone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bone)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/8 "2018-09-25T18:40:43Z")

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> [@Quartz](#):
>
> Have you considered the nerdish misandry of the Dope? Men being automatically in the wrong? Women being on pedestals? Women demanding they be put on pedestals?
> 
> Two wrongs don’t make a right, but consider this: seeing people make misandrist and misogynist comments allows you to know that they are misandrist or misogynist.

In a thread about misogyny, your first thought is what about the dudes? That’s either super meta or incredibly bad form.

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**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/9 "2018-09-25T18:49:07Z")

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> [@Bone](#):
>
> In a thread about misogyny, your first thought is what about the dudes? That’s either super meta or incredibly bad form.

Let’s vote on which one it was.

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**Author:** ![Ulfreida](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ulfreida/32/8014_2.png) [@Ulfreida](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ulfreida)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/10 "2018-09-25T18:51:09Z")

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> [@RobDog](#):
>
> Didn’t Nerdish Misandry win the 1993 Man Booker Prize?

I’m pretty sure you’re right. In fact I think he’s won quite a few awards.

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**Author:** ![octopus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/octopus/32/3716_2.png) [@octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/octopus)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/11 "2018-09-25T18:52:35Z")

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Weaponizing language in order to empower the internet equivalent of the Hecklers’ Veto strikes me as a bad idea. Can we get a clear definition of misogynistic language and when it’s appropriate to sanction a poster for said transgression? Would pointing out differences in life choices as an impact in lifetime earnings be misogynistic or misandristic or some other form of so-called hate speech? What about gendered slurs in the Pit?

I’m not sure how a forum that encourages debates, discusses politics, and has a pit can reconcile freedom of expression which is on topic and appropriate for those sort of forums and insulate each reader from any potentially triggering content.

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**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/12 "2018-09-25T18:56:43Z")

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> [@Bone](#):
>
> In a thread about misogyny, your first thought is what about the dudes? That’s either super meta or incredibly bad form.

It’s his thing.

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**Author:** ![Quartz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quartz/32/267_2.png) [@Quartz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quartz)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/13 "2018-09-25T18:57:48Z")

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> [@Exapno\_Mapcase](#):
>
> Everybody knows who’s on that list.

Really? You for one would be wrong.

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**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/14 "2018-09-25T19:59:59Z")

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> [@Quartz](#):
>
> Really? You for one would be wrong.

Huh. I thought I was agreeing with you. Why did you make that post if the result wasn’t to imply that we would judge people by their words and remember who said what?

We know who the misogynist posters are, because they post misogynistic comments. They do so persistently, in thread after thread.

We also know who keeps saying there’s rampant misandry on the Dope. There’s an amazing amount of correlation between those two lists.

Don’t want to be on those lists? I got a solution for you.

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/15 "2018-09-25T20:02:07Z")

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> [@Quartz](#):
>
> Have you considered the nerdish misandry of the Dope?

Ooh, ooh, what about the knee-jerk reaction against declawing cats on the Dope!

I have an idea! What if I try to turn this thread about misogyny into a thread about something else, and then the next five pages can be increasingly irritated people telling me to start my own damn thread.

Alternatively, what if Quartz’s hijack gets nipped in the bud, maybe even moved to its own new thread, as elbows’s post was?

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**Author:** ![The\_Librarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_librarian/32/402_2.png) [@The\_Librarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Librarian)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/16 "2018-09-25T20:16:36Z")

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Ok

Let us throw some concrete ideas around:

- Complaints get you warnings: warnings get you a topic ban. No questions asked.

Let’s do it without “endless discussion in the mod loop”. And don’t be afraid to err on the side of being heavy handed: We’ll sort them out later. But let us lean AWAY from misogyny for a while.

If some old white dude gets a unjust gag: I’m sure we’ll manage with one less voice in that part of the choir. There’s enough of those. (Hell, I’m one)

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**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/17 "2018-09-25T20:20:39Z")

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> [@The\_Librarian](#):
>
> But let us lean AWAY from misogyny for a while.

Yeah. The free speech concerns aren’t so great that erring on the side of not saying shitty misogynistic things is gonna bring about re-education camps.

> [@](#):
>
> If some old white dude gets a unjust gag: I’m sure we’ll manage with one less voice in that part of the choir. There’s enough of those. (Hell, I’m one)

For real.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Exapno\_Mapcase](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/exapno_mapcase/32/1051_2.png) [@Exapno\_Mapcase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Exapno_Mapcase)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/18 "2018-09-25T20:24:24Z")

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Old white dudes. #We’reNotAllLikeThat

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/19 "2018-09-25T20:29:55Z")

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> [@Exapno\_Mapcase](#):
>
> Old white dudes. #We’reNotAllLikeThat

Granted, but also this is one of those things more persuasively communicated through actions, not claims. Also, if we want to talk about that anyway (and I guarandamntee some folks do), seems like the topic for another thread.

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<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![The\_Librarian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_librarian/32/402_2.png) [@The\_Librarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Librarian)\
**Post date:** [September 25, 2018, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899/20 "2018-09-25T21:37:57Z")

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[ol]  
[/ol]

> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#):
>
> If you have any specific suggestions on what we should do, please post them here.(…)

Hand out warnings/topic bans liberally.

> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#):
>
> (…)This suggestion seems like more of a dig at the current moderation, but if there actually is enough interest in a “misogyny free” forum or a forum specifically for women, then perhaps we can create one. Anyone interested in this, please feel free to discuss.(…)

Yes, and rightly so. The apparent impotence is getting frustrating. For example, the amount of effort some members had to put in to get Skald to tone down was ridiculous.  
For the “misogyny free” forum I would nominate ATMB, GQ, E, CS, TGR, TG, IMHO, MPSIMS and the Pit. Maybe you can resurrect the Barn House for the usual suspects.

> [@engineer\_comp\_geek](#):
>
> (…)Feel free to discuss any rule changes as well. Maybe start with a proposed rule change, as in spell out exactly what you would want this rule to say.

“Any complaints about misogyny, racism or other bigotry results in a insta-suspension to be reviewed at our leisure”  
If someone makes too many unfounded complaints turn the sword around. But for starters give the benefit of doubt.  
If we can make the suspension for specific forums that would be even better.

The mods don’t have to be perfectly fair. It is OK to make mistakes. But right now we are erring to the side of inaction too often.

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/misogyny-on-the-sdmb-sept-2018-edition/821899.md?page=2)
