# Missing Coworker, Part II **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 18, 2003, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741 "2003-06-18T17:16:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/241 "2003-06-23T17:47:07Z")
There was a writing contest many months ago like this. Anyone could participate, all were given the same general theme. Entries were emailed to one person, who then posted each in a thread, and votes were placed in the thread. I’m not sure how ‘official’ the voting was. Afterwards the anonymous authors came out to take a bow, supporters were thanked, and we had a big after-party at the Viper Room. Okay, everything except that last bit. ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/242 "2003-06-23T17:47:22Z")
Oh, Auntie! Those two encounters really creeped me out! Worse than the Missing Cow-Orker scenario. Maybe she made a quilt with a square for each bizarre thing that happened during her MIA period. 😉 The “blind” story ending could be done by people e-mailing their story endings to Auntie or someone else. Then they could be re-posted by “number” or something and let people vote on them. ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/243 "2003-06-23T17:47:31Z")
Someone impartial could receive the submissions, strip out the usernames, and either post them in a thread or on a website and link it here. Heck, I’d even volunteer to do that to continue this saga. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/244 "2003-06-23T18:20:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lno \* > \*\*Heck, I’d even volunteer to do that to continue this saga. \*\* Tag, then: you’re it! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/245 "2003-06-23T18:34:59Z")
But I wanna see if if MC has a hissy fit IRL!!! I want hysterics! I want paperclips to be thrown. I want protests of “you can’t fire me – I quit!” I want MC doused with a bucket of water so she screams “Ack! I’m melting! I’m melting!..” ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/246 "2003-06-23T18:35:30Z")
**lno** , I’d say you’re hired! But since this was **Shibb’s** idea, I’ll leave it up to . . . him? her? to be Human Resources Director. 🙂 BTW, **Kalhoun** , MC _did_ send a baby quilt (via yours truly) months later to my friend (keep in mind that their only contact was that awkward 15 minutes at my house), when she found out that said friend had adopted a child. Oh, and she also sent two to my sister (whom she’d also met ONCE) when she had twins. I’m feeling a little less “special”, here. :dubious: But I bet Trucker still loves me. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/247 "2003-06-23T18:43:19Z")
I’m fine with **lno** running the show. He could even add a little rage to it. And I’m a hymn, not a Hur. ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc348/32.png) [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/248 "2003-06-23T18:51:01Z")
Stay away from Trucker Auntie, he has away of making women wig out and disapear for weeks. ANd if you go, I don’t think skip would start the thread “My missing fiance”. He be to busy buying shotguns and what now :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![lno](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@lno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lno)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/249 "2003-06-23T19:01:09Z")
Right. The [Missing Coworker Contest](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=192857) is underway. ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2003, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/250 "2003-06-23T23:39:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by MonkeyMule \* > \*\*Stay away from Trucker Auntie, he has away of making women wig out and disapear for weeks. ANd if you go, I don’t think skip would start the thread “My missing fiance”. He be to busy buying shotguns and what now :dubious: \*\* Not unless I’m that trucker after all… ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/251 "2003-06-24T03:00:44Z")
Is there some reason why **auntie em & SkipMagic** couldn’t kidnap and murder this woman to give this thread a proper ending? Aside from the moral and legal issues I mean. ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/252 "2003-06-24T04:12:33Z")
Dammit, Zebra, that was what I was going to write! I was basing it on “The Postman Always Rings Twice,” with **SkipMagic** the besotted male tempted into a web of evil by the seductive **auntie em.** ☹ Now I have to think up something else entirely… ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc348/32.png) [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/253 "2003-06-24T12:53:39Z")
I’m still holding out for MC to show up t o work and demand her job back!: “Yeah I know I’m crazy and disappeared for two weeks, but you know what – I’m a NON-WHITE WOMAN with some unknown disorder that smells! Do you have any idea what it’s like to walk through this office with that disease sniffer out there? Oh and lets not get started on my cheap assed “friends” who can’t send money orders to non disclosed locations when I’m out gallivanting around the mid west _ON A MISSION FROM THE FBI TO SAVE THE FREE WORLD_. I guess national security isn’t a big deal to you now is it? This is only my cover job (I don’t know why I’m telling you this) but the government _needs_ me to work here so as to provide enough cover from my efforts to undermine Bin Ladin. These disappearances of mine are all secret missions, I haven’t told you till now because my job was never in jeopardy before. Now where is my crap, I’m going back to work [cries] it’s hard work not being white, working for the FBI, saving the world all the while being a woman, please understand. Y the way do you need a quilt?” ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc348/32.png) [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/254 "2003-06-24T12:53:51Z")
I’m still holding out for MC to show up t o work and demand her job back!: “Yeah I know I’m crazy and disappeared for two weeks, but you know what – I’m a NON-WHITE WOMAN with some unknown disorder that smells! Do you have any idea what it’s like to walk through this office with that disease sniffer out there? Oh and lets not get started on my cheap assed “friends” who can’t send money orders to non disclosed locations when I’m out gallivanting around the mid west _ON A MISSION FROM THE FBI TO SAVE THE FREE WORLD_. I guess national security isn’t a big deal to you now is it? This is only my cover job (I don’t know why I’m telling you this) but the government _needs_ me to work here so as to provide enough cover from my efforts to undermine Bin Ladin. These disappearances of mine are all secret missions, I haven’t told you till now because my job was never in jeopardy before. Now where is my crap, I’m going back to work [cries] it’s hard work not being white, working for the FBI, saving the world all the while being a woman, please understand. By the way do you need a quilt?” ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/255 "2003-06-24T13:03:51Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by StarvingButStrong \* > **Dammit, Zebra, that was what I was going to write! I was basing it on “The Postman Always Rings Twice,” with SkipMagic the besotted male tempted into a web of evil by the seductive auntie em.** You have. No. Idea… ---
**Author:** ![DeVena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/dec6dc/32.png) [@DeVena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeVena)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/256 "2003-06-24T13:51:26Z")
I’m wanting to know what they found when they cleaned out MC’s desk. Why yes, I am the nosiest woman you’ve ever seen. Why do you ask? ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/257 "2003-06-24T14:14:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SkipMagic \* > \*\*You have. No. Idea… \*\* A-ha! Hit the nail on the head, didn’t I? Huh? Huh? Didn’t I? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/258 "2003-06-24T14:58:16Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by DeVena \* > \*\*I’m wanting to know what they found when they cleaned out MC’s desk. > > Why yes, I am the nosiest woman you’ve ever seen. Why do you ask? \*\* Lots of teddy bears and poems about frienship, hugs, and Jesus. You’re disappointed, aren’t you? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/259 "2003-06-24T15:03:48Z")
No severed fingers? Damn. ---
**Author:** ![MonkeyMule](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc348/32.png) [@MonkeyMule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MonkeyMule)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2003, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741/260 "2003-06-24T15:22:58Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by auntie em \* > \*\*You’re disappointed, aren’t you? 😉 \*\* you have no idea ☹ This has to be the biggest let down since Mission Impossible 2 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/missing-coworker-part-ii/182741.md?page=14)