# MLB: September 2017

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mlb-september-2017/795238>\
**Category:** The Game Room\
**Created:** [September 1, 2017, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mlb-september-2017/795238 "2017-09-01T12:09:58Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Showing post:** 42

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**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\
**Post date:** [September 5, 2017, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mlb-september-2017/795238/42 "2017-09-05T16:52:32Z")

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> [@dalej42](#):
>
> The Jeter Marlins are planning on slicing payroll while paying Jeter a 5 million dollar annual salary.  
> This isn’t from The Onion.  
> [The new Marlins owners plan to slash payroll - NBC Sports](http://mlb.nbcsports.com/2017/09/04/the-new-marlins-owners-plan-to-slash-payroll/)
> 
> You have got to be kidding me. The Marlins have been a joke for so long and now they’re going to get worse because owning a baseball team, even if non competitive and only draws fans of the visiting team, is a licence to print money.
> 
> It isn’t a good way to get fans from the younger generation. A kid growing up in South Florida who has only memories of years of lousy Marlins baseball isn’t likely to become a fan for life. Especially if their memories of going to the ballpark consists of going with their grandparents who used to live in Boston to see a Marlins vs Red Sox game and the entire crowd is rooting for the Red Sox.

My post in the “If I was king of baseball” thread last month (with added bolding):

> [@If I was king of baseball](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/if-i-was-king-of-baseball/793110/74):
>
> 1. No more designated hitter.
> 2. The two teams I hate the most (Cardinals and White Sox) are relegated to AA, with no possibility of being promoted back up to the major leagues or even to AAA. No other teams may relocate to Chicago or St. Louis, leaving this territory to the Cubs alone.
> 3. No player may use country music as his walk-up song. No country music will be played in the stadium at all, in fact. There will be large cash bonuses for players who pick Kesha songs as their walk-up songs.
> 4. Batting helmets must be kept reasonably clean, with no ugly pine tar residue all over the place.  
> **5. I don’t like the teams that didn’t exist when I first started following baseball (1986). Therefore, the Marlins, Diamondbacks, Rays, and Rockies must make do with minimum-salary players. Obviously these teams will suck year after year, but that’s not my problem.** (The Nationals don’t count because they existed as the Expos)

My initiatives are already starting to be implemented!

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