I hereby nominate this for funniest post of the year!
Pour encourager les autres.
Labor is cheap in China too. And poison is amazingly cheap – it’s used as a filler in most of their processed export foods.
Except that they executed this guy real fast, before he had a chance to testify in court about other Chinese officials who might also have been taking bribes.
Way to get rid of the cooperating witness!
Bet lots of higher-up Chinese Officials breathed a sigh of relief.
“Scooter? Hi, Dick Cheney, here. Listen, you sitting down? Got some kinda bad news…”
Not nearly as cheap as in Rwanda. Chinese salaries keep climbing and executions can’t be outsourced cheaply or easily. And the filler poisons don’t work fast enough to shut a guy up.
Rwandan execution costs are skewed downward by the unusually high levels of volunteerism. Plus, they have just about reached the technological limits of the machete as an execution tool. Making them bigger or sharper just won’t make much total difference in throughput.
The Chinese Death Bus, however, is still relatively early in its development. AFAIK, they haven’t yet harnessed the exhaust system for gassing, their kinetic kills are by sheer accident on the way to and from execution sites – hell, they could even take power off an axle using some kind of block and tackle for mass strangulation. There is a great deal of untapped potential.
How do you think they make the petfood? “New FRISKY-BITS! Give your cat a REAL taste of Asia!”
Puts a whole new meaning to “General Tsao’s Chicken”.
I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for this administration to apply the existing sanctions for corruption in high places, much less the death penalty.
How are you so sure they won’t eventually make a machete so big and so sharp it destroys us all? I, for one, believe the UN must, before it’s too late, put in place a treaty stopping machete escalation and which eventually ends machete disarm- and disheadament.
The Nazis got good, but not great, results from using truck exhaust, normally a waste product thrown willy-nilly into the atmosphere, but they usually used the trucks stationary, piping the gases into a room, which was a waste of fuel. Only rarely did they load up the back and poison the prisoners there, and that was while driving around the German, Czech, or Polish countryside, making a great loop before ending at a mass gravesite near where they started. A pleasant outing for the driver but wasteful joyriding from an environmental standpoint. Your idea for using the trip between execution sites for additional executions is the sort of breakthrough thinking we need to fight Global Warming!
Taking power off the wheel for mass strangulations is good, and how about this idea I got from a documentary about the Romans called “Ben Hur”: You mount the blades from some Rwandan machetes to the Death Bus’ wheels and you don’t even need to slow down to execute people! Remember folks, we’re brainstorming so there’s no such thing as a bad idea.
Continuing the Charlton Heston theme…nah, “Soylent Green” references are too easy.
One word: Biodiesel.
Does anyone know if China also executed the people who offered/paid the bribes to get their poisons approved? Because I have no problem with those scumbags getting justice.
“Give your cat that GREAT LEAP FORWARD with new CHAIRMAN MEOW.”
Szechuan dumplings,
after the deal has been done…
it’s a glamour profession…
with cardboard compression…
[/my steely dan parody]
Seconded.
So far, they have not even been arrested or charged with any crime. Indeed, their names have been left out of the news reports on this.