# MMP - As serious as a heart attack. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [December 12, 2005, 7:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230 "2005-12-12T07:36:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/141 "2005-12-14T16:25:27Z")
Oh where oh where have my icons gone? Oh where oh where could they be? Against my wishes, I’ve been migrated to Windows XP at work. In reality, it was more of a “Here’s your new laptop with XP on it. Have fun!” I dunno - migrations usually migrate people’s files and settings. Not this one. Grrr… The absolute first thing I did was set a proper desktop resolution, then turn off all that XP eye candy. There’s a certain “glow” to XP that I dislike. Bye-bye, big green Start button! Now it looks like Windows 2000, but runs a heck of a lot faster. Once I find and map to the network drive that my files are on, it should be nice. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/142 "2005-12-14T16:32:43Z")
Forgot to mention the neighborhood Xmas tacky… The white trash\* renters across the street from us put one of those light nets for a bush in the front window. Except, it’s multi-colored in stripes, and not meant to be hung vertically in a window, so they have a sagging grid pattern of colored lights in the window. - Trust me on this . Between parking four cars in the two-car driveway - one diagonally so it’ll fit, their general appearance and leaving a laundry detergent bottle in the front yard, they’re sitcom source material. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/143 "2005-12-14T16:32:51Z")
> [@Spatial Rift 47](#): > > Every New Year’s we go around to this one area in Mahwah, NJ, a huge multi-part cul-de-sac of massive properties, about half of which have their entire property covered with lights. Especially this one house, the biggest property, popularly known as the “Elvis house,” because they have an illuminated animatronic Elvis on their roof as part of the display. Now _that_ is tacky. 😃 Oooh, I know that house! There’s another great one in Livingston, I think, but that might be too far for ya. I haven’t gone searching for the ubertacky need-subsidizing-from-PSE&G houses in a while. Maybe I’ll do some of that this weekend. ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/144 "2005-12-14T16:46:19Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > [**Drae** , puking Santa. HEE! They have two inflatable Frosty The Snowmen on the lawn of the hospital next door. The wind is blowing kinda strong right now, so Frosty[sup]2[/sup] are kinda dancing around. It’d be so jake if they went airborne! That is a mating display–NOT the wind. Sexual congress should initiate once winds are 20 mph. “Kinda dancing”(!)–such ignorance. **welby** --I’ll tink bout it. Have you a profile with addy and all? sending lemon bars is quite a commitment, and [digs toe in carpet] we DID just meet… Or how about virtual lemon bars? Soooo good… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/145 "2005-12-14T17:35:35Z")
> [@Spatial Rift 47](#): > > Yay! Sounds good to me! 🙂 All right then! Welcome to **Wallflower**! And it sure is cold today…brr! Chilly. The only thing exposed on me when I walked the 1/4 mile from the bus stop to work this morning were my cheeks (get your mind out of the gutter!) and they felt completely frozen. Thank Og for the coffee I was holding. Also last night is the first night we’ve gone to sleep with the heat on. The heat in our apartment is weird, we have a small radiator in each room, with seperate controls, so we can just heat the room we’re in. (Part of the reason we don’t get a parrot, even though we’re pining desperately for one, we’d have to keep him in the bedroom with us and you just dont do that with parrots unless you never want to sleep past dawn again.) And this morning the SO says to me, “It’s time to get the BIG comforter out.” We have a HUGE king-size comforter which is so warm! ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/146 "2005-12-14T17:45:19Z")
oooooooooh, **welby** was angry! :eek: Are you serious about your co-worker and your job? If so, I’d be pissed too. How’d the talk with the boss turn out? I’m so thankful that my office situation allows me to stay out of all of that bullshit. The lemon bar recipe sounds pretty yummy, but I stayed home sick today. Every part of my body aches and I cannot get warm. I have way too much stuff at work that needs to be completed. Aagh! I"m gonna spend three days catching up today. Welcome **Wallflower**! The lights still are not up on the house. **Mr. Taters** was going to do Saturday and then Sunday, but our neighbor needed his ladder more than we did. So, still no lights. I’m thinking **Mr. Taters** is just going to say “Screw it!”, which would be kinda sad. We don’t really have “the tacky”, just white icecicle lights, some lights wrapped around the column on my front porch, and a couple of lights in the bushes leading to my entry way. That’s all. No huge snowmen, Santas, or globes. Maybe some coffee would warm me up. I think I’m going to make some now. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/147 "2005-12-14T18:01:39Z")
Ok, have y’all checked out the Limerick thread? I won’t call any names, but a couple of wiseasses puggy have a limerick starring **lieu** and me. It is: **swampy and lieu** went to China Dressed as Burt Reynolds and Dinah Said **swampy** “See here, Neither’s burly, I fear But you know me – I’m no whineah” I had to close my office door I was laughin’ so hard! ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/148 "2005-12-14T18:19:13Z")
I’m officially growing a beard. I shaved off some of the scraggly neck hair that made it look ugly, but ??? has mandated that I not shave for the meantime. I’m inclined to agree with him, because I hate shaving. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 6:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/149 "2005-12-14T18:25:30Z")
> [@chaoticbear](#): > > I’m officially growing a beard. I shaved off some of the scraggly neck hair that made it look ugly, but ??? has mandated that I not shave for the meantime. I’m inclined to agree with him, because I hate shaving. 🙂 Pictures must accompany any and all reports on the progression of the beard. Understand, young man? ---
**Author:** ![scout1222](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/34f0e0/32.png) [@scout1222](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scout1222)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/150 "2005-12-14T18:46:47Z")
Any limerick featuring **lieu** is bound to be a good’un. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/151 "2005-12-14T19:02:22Z")
> [@Taters](#): > > oooooooooh, **welby** was angry! :eek: Are you serious about your co-worker and your job? Indeed I am. Basically what happened is that **Idiot Boy** and **Lazy Girl** were having a gossip session about people in our office, something which happens whenever they think no one is listening. Along comes **Nosy Dillhole** , who is a manager for another group, who listens in, participates in the gossip session, and then reports thier “accusations” to my boss. The accusation was, essentially, that I was running my real estate business form my cubicle, which is untrue. I _have_ made a few phone calls - - from my cell phone, on my lunch hour, when I’ve had business to attend to. During my work hours, the phone is off, and always has been. So several things about this make me mad: 1. **IB** is supposed to work a 9 day fortnight, meaning he’s supposed to work 9 hours a day in order to get every other Friday off. Daily, he comes in at 9:45 (15 minutes before the boss) and leaves at 3 (right after the boss goes to her daily meetings). Yet he feels the need to make up stories about my work habits, and then _defend his rattletrap nonsense when the boss calls him in to ask about it._ 2. **LG** does run a business form her cube, namely an E-Bay buy / sell operation. She is constantly on the phone with her customers, sending e-mails, and printing mailing and shipping labels on the printer here. And yet, she feels it’s okay to criticize me for my work habits. 3. **ND** , who has no idea even _who I am_ (he had to ask my boss) runs and reports this. You’d think he would report it as “hey, these two employees of yours were saying. . .” No, instead he sends an e-mail that says, essentially, **welby** is running a business out of his cube, and if you don’t stop it I will. 4. I never participate in any of the stupid gossip. I come here to work and go home, not play politics in a place where politics means nothing. So I got to talk to the uberboss about it. I sold everyone out. Screw them. I pointed out that if I had so much business that I had to do it “all day long at work, instead of doing my real job” I wouldn’t need to work here. I then suggested that she check **IB’s** server and door code access logs and reset the print queue (at her request) for **LG** to print a copy to her printer. I expect the two little motormouths are going to have a bad holiday. At least I hope they do. > [@Taters](#): > > The lemon bar recipe sounds pretty yummy, but I stayed home sick today. Lemon bars have Vitamin C in them. That’s good for you if you have a cold. Get **Mr. Taters** to make them for you. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/152 "2005-12-14T19:04:04Z")
> [@chaoticbear](#): > > I’m officially growing a beard. I shaved off some of the scraggly neck hair that made it look ugly, but ??? has mandated that I not shave for the meantime. I’m inclined to agree with him, because I hate shaving. 🙂 I love my beard. I grew it when I was hitchiking back in the days of my misspent youth, and never shaved it when I got home. I trim it every 2 weeks or so, which is so much better than shaving every day. ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/153 "2005-12-14T19:12:24Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > **Tupug** --[Rigby’s paranoia kicks in] Why do you say that about pet owners with my post? So, you sayin’ I’m dumb, eh? Well, I’m smarter than my _cat_ --and too sexy for my cat, too! [/Rigby’s paranoia gone] > > (if you knew the verbal abuse I give the kitty every morning because he won’t stop meowing until I have shown him the damn food–you would no longer like me. Stupid ass cat–he watches me put the damned food in the bowl; I leave the room to do whatever and he follows me, crying. I go back in the kitchen and point to his dish and say, “there’s your food, you feliron!” and then he is happy. We do this every morning. :rolleyes: ) Not at all, **rigs**! Somebody’s gotta take care of the cat maroons. 😉 **swampy** , glad you enjoyed it. **welby** , that just totally sucks! Keep your back to the wall. ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/154 "2005-12-14T19:34:54Z")
Why is it when someone stays home sick, her phone must ring constantly?! Grrrr. I can’t ignore the phone because it might be work calling with a question. Yes, this happens, and NO I don’t have caller ID. I’m too cheap to pay extra for the service. I wish I had a work issued laptop so I could at least take care of some work while I’m home. I can’t bring home work and do it on my personal computer because of HIPAA. They can issue me a laptop however, that links directly to my PC at work, and I would be HIPAA compliant and I could get some work accomplished. However, there are only three laptops for my division, and they’ve all been issued. :rolleyes: So, I won’t do the work. Two of the people have absolutely NO use for them, but won’t give the laptops up. One of those two, doesn’t even work when she’s AT work and pawns her work to everyone around her claiming she’s too busy. Yeah, she’s busy alright…busy coming in late, busy flitting around the hospital like a social butterfly, etc. It pisses me off. Thank Og I don’t work in her branch because she and I would not get along. Fortunately, she can’t pass any of her work to me. Unfortunately for me; I’m one deep with no back-up. When I miss work, my work doesn’t get done. Period, except for one twice a day report that takes five minutes put out on our shared drive. Our Management Assistant is supposed publish this spreadsheet to one of my shared drives during my absence, but, she’s out sick today too. So, I’ll be missing a day’s worth of data when I do my monthly report for this particular area. Oh well… Lessee, I’m sounding very cranky these last few posts. I need to cheer up and I need to quit kvetching. Oh! I almost forgot. **Mr. Taters** had a bit of an issue/sorta run-in with a customer yesterday. The hubby is a semi-driver and works for a large national transport company. Yesterday, the hubby went to make a delivery at a particular receiver. He backed the trailer in where his company has ALWAYS backed their trailers in. That’s when the irritation began. A little feller, no taller than my husband’s chin (my husband is maybe 5’9’’), began harassing my husband. “That’s not where you put that trailer”, he yelled to which my husband replied, “this is where we ALWAYS deliver our trailers”. “Now, if your policies have changed, you need to tell us…politely”. Little Mr. Napoleon Complex replied “Noooooo, that’s where the LAZY people drop their trailers.” Now, **Mr. Taters** is beginning to get pissed. Little Mr. Irritating Garden Gnome, told my husband, “You gety paid by the hour, you can move it”. To which my husband replied, “No, we get paid by LOAD, not the hour.” This little twerp had the nerve to tell my husband, "No, you get paid by the hour, you don’t know what you’re talking about. Excuse me!? I think my husband knows how he’s paid. **Mr. Taters** is thinking to himself, "I’d like to twist your head off, you friggin’ little garden gnome. So, although he’s pissed, my husband can’t really crawl down this guy’s throat. He’s also thinking to himself that this fellow was a little elf costume short of being in the Lord of the Rings. He’s thinking this along with the garden gnome thoughts. He’s seriously thinking of telling this guy what’s running through his head, but of course, he doesn’t. The husband handled it far better than I would have; I would have found a way to put this little cretin in his place. I wouldn’t have any problem doing it and I know how to do it without getting into trouble. Working for DoD has taught me many valuable lessons, and this is one of them. There I go sounding all angry and pissy again. Really and truly, I’m not like that. I don’t want to frighten off our newbies and I don’t want the “Cool Kids” to think I’m getting all crotchety and bitchy. Because I’m not…dammit! ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/155 "2005-12-14T19:42:28Z")
**welby,** I just saw your latest post on what happened. I stay out of the office politics and gossip too. Fortunately, my office is sorta private and I don’t have to go out in the main area of my division too often. So, although I might know a lot of what is going on (it’s surprising what people tell me), I keep my mouth shut and my opinions to myself. It’s just better for my mental and physical health that way. Good for you for standing up for yourself. Frankly, I have too much work to do to be worried about who’s working and who’s not working. I think some people are going to be mightily screwed when the NSPS pay system is activated though. Pay for performance is going to be a real wake up call. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/156 "2005-12-14T19:55:32Z")
**Rigs** are you saying the Frostys are about to make little Frostys? Should I alert Wendy’s of possible trademark infringment? HAH! I slay me! **welby** the gossipers will have their comeuppance and it ain’t gonna be pretty. See, their misdoin’s can be well-documented and there is absolutely no evidence of misdoin’ on your part. It’s fun to watch others dig their own graves ain’t it? One of the advantages of being a boss is, whenever I get wind of office gossip, the gossipees get their butts handed to 'em and, if possible, extra assignments because, you know, obviously if you’ve got time to gossip you don’t have enough work to do, right? Sometimes people in “professional” positions find themselves helping out with the backlog of filing and such. Like I said, sometimes being boss is gooooood! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/157 "2005-12-14T19:58:25Z")
I just found [this recipe](http://www.nytimes.com/2005/12/14/dining/141nrex.html) for Molten Chocolate Babycakes. Do you think I should try it? ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/158 "2005-12-14T20:00:47Z")
> [@taxi78cab](#): > > I just found [this recipe](http://www.nytimes.com/2005/12/14/dining/141nrex.html) for Molten Chocolate Babycakes. Do you think I should try it? It says we gotta register for it. I ain’t doin’ it cause I’m a rebel. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/159 "2005-12-14T20:04:23Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > It says we gotta register for it. I ain’t doin’ it cause I’m a rebel. I ain’t doin’ it because Molten Chocolate sounds too much like Molten Lava to me. And because I don’t feel like washing the dishes. I’ll make some after I move to the bell tower. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Taters](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/taters/32/2845_2.png) [@Taters](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taters)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2005, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230/160 "2005-12-14T20:05:42Z")
Hee-hee! **Swampy** said it for me. Can you cut and paste the recipe, **taxi?** Giving appropriate credit where credit is due, of course. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-as-serious-as-a-heart-attack/335230.md?page=9)