# MMP: Garage Sales, an early Father's Day and a birthday party **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [May 22, 2006, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715 "2006-05-22T05:40:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/241 "2006-05-25T14:57:27Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > VunderKind got hisself gradjumakated last night. Oh, dear sweet God in heaven–I am one sick bastard. I thought this said that Vunderkind got hisself ejaculated last night. :eek: I’m off to raise havoc and mistinterprete things at HD and the Village Hall (car stickers, finally). ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/242 "2006-05-25T15:13:13Z")
> [@Sean Factotum](#): > > ´´´´´´´éé > cliché > risqué > brouléé > > Cool. Thanks. Thîs îs fùň. Ĩ thįŋk wè sĥőůld ālwāys dö thís. Or not, it gets tiresome very quickly. Anyway, As Arthur Dent once said, “Today must be Thursday. I never could quite get the hang of Thursdays.” My sister is asleep on the couch, she’s just had her wisdom teeth removed. Where mine were well behaved, hers were less so. Impacted or somesuch, so she’s going to be out of it for a couple of days. Fortunately, I, her heroic older brother, am here to take care of her. Also my father is home today. **Rebo** , nice pun. I’m impressed. 🙂 CONGRATULATIONS VUNDERKIND My plans for today involve (yep, you guessed it) more video games, and also going to see my [del]head shrinker[/del] psychiatrist this afternoon. I’ve been seeing this doctor since I was in the first grade, and now it seems his semi-retirement is becoming full retirement. So I may have to go find another doctor by the end of this year. Ah well. Life moves on, as always. And speaking of life moving on: > [@](#): > > Pun of the Day: > > Naturally, I didn’t suspect anything. I came home, the toilet paper was scattered all over the house, and the cat food formed what can only be termed a blast radius around the dish. All in a day’s work for a cat owner, but Sparky was such a cute cat. The unnatural moans should have tipped me off, I suppose, but I didn’t think anything was wrong until I walked into the next room and saw Sparky, who now apparently had opposable thumbs, and could stand on his suddenly 4 foot long hind legs. > > Yes, that’s right. My cat had mewtated. Try not to throw anything larger or more painful than a tomato, okay? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tupug\_Anachi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7993a0/32.png) [@Tupug\_Anachi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tupug_Anachi)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/243 "2006-05-25T15:22:57Z")
> [@Spatial Rift 47](#): > > Try not to throw anything larger or more painful than a tomato, okay? 🙂 ::Flings several muskrats and some bunny babies for good measure!:: ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/244 "2006-05-25T15:28:32Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > She’s fine in the Lupus department, but all the time sitting last night took a toll on her plain ol’ arthritis, and she’s moving slow today. :smack: I forgot to say CONGRATS to **VunderKind** Um, **Spatsie** , mayhaps you could try life without a therapist for a while? (I’m one to talk, heh, I’ve been seeing mine since 1985, but then I’m also 20++ years older than you) ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/245 "2006-05-25T15:29:36Z")
:: flings confetti :: ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/246 "2006-05-25T15:30:28Z")
I’m at work! OK, it’s just a one-day temp assignment–I’m phone girl at a tile place, because one of their guys broke a tooth and has to go to the dentist, but I’m working, and I’ll get paid. The temp agency also should have some actual accounting work for me to do as my next assignment. And someone bought me two months of paid livejournal time. Time to make more icons! And I was worried that this would be a bad day. I have a lot of other stuff to do, like faxing a whole bunch of papers to a company so they will talk to me, and buying some khakis. I haven’t found decent khakis anywhere. Except Lane Bryant, and theirs are just what I’m looking for, but a bit more than this cheapskate wants to pay. I’ve lost weight, but not enough yet to move from the fat chick stores. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/247 "2006-05-25T15:35:29Z")
Congrats, **Tel**! ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/248 "2006-05-25T15:40:03Z")
Yay **Tel!** Yay for **Vunderkid!** ::Picks up a muskrat covered in spaghetti, tosses it aside, accidently (ha) hits **mika** with it, grabs a bunny covered in whatever that stuff is they’re eating in **rigs’** garden, tosses it aside, finds some confetti and tosses THAT:: ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/249 "2006-05-25T15:41:37Z")
> [@Spatial Rift 47](#): > > As Arthur Dent once said, “Today must be Thursday. I never could quite get the hang of Thursdays.” heh. Moments before I read this, i said this VERY thing to someone here, and got the blankest stare ever in return. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/250 "2006-05-25T15:43:14Z")
> [@Telperien](#): > > I’ve lost weight, but not enough yet to move from the fat chick stores. Wait till you get to the point where everything at LB is a little too big, and everything everywhere else is a little too small. That precise spot is the low end of my constantly-fluctuating weight range. (And when you add the fact that even petite sizes are three to four inches too long for me, you understand why I hate clothes shopping. 🙂 ) But congrats on any kind of employment. 🙂 And all the associated congrats and feel betters and everything else I missed this week because I was so taken up with my stupid, traitorous reproductive system. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/251 "2006-05-25T15:46:14Z")
In between LB and JCP is Catherine’s - and they have some gorgeous stuff there. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/252 "2006-05-25T15:52:08Z")
Why do I find it funny that a guy at a tile place would chip a tooth? But – congrats on finding temp employment. Don’t bite any tile. ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/253 "2006-05-25T15:55:21Z")
My Lane Bryant story: Early days of our marriage, and not yet accustomed to buying chicks clothing, I was out Christmas shopping. I passed by a sign in the mall that said: \*\* “Sweaters - Really Cheap!! And One Size Fits All, Yes Even Her!!!”\*\* So, I amble in, not caring or knowing what Lane Bryant is for. The helpful salesgirl didn’t help, and since the bin said “One size…”, I just found a nice pink one and paid. Happy that I did the “shopping for wimmen” thing right. FF to Christmas, Bus Wife, who’s 5’9", and at the time maybe 150, not your typical LB customer, unwraps, sees the box and just stares at me. She’s understanding, if just a BIT bugged that I thought I should shop for her there. I’m mystified, til she explains. ooops. :smack: So she tries on the sweater. It’s big, but COMFY big. She actually likes it because it has that hanging really loose look to it. Likes it so much that it was 10-12 years before it got too threadbare too wear anymore. So, Stooopid guy me, but a happy ending. ---
**Author:** ![welby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/d78d45/32.png) [@welby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/welby)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/254 "2006-05-25T16:13:16Z")
> [@Ellen Cherry](#): > > What? WHAT? [Bunnies](http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/images/17157513_b83c8d3351.jpg) … [are](http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/images/152685082_f2b873405d.jpg) … [the …](http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/images/mike_4.jpg) [cutest](http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/images/bunny.jpg) …[things](http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/images/3918964.jpg) …[ever!!](http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/images/mrsnuggles01_1.jpg) I don’t know aobut cute, but they sure look good like [this.](http://moblog.co.uk/blogs/4823/moblog_f87ab56e20655.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/255 "2006-05-25T16:16:05Z")
> [@Sean Factotum](#): > > Are we done throwing food around? You know there are starving children in Africa, it’s a sin to waste food, etc etc etc. (Yes, trotting out all those grandmother cliches)(and I’m typing from a Mac-type computer, so I can’t make the little accent marked e for cliche.) Of course you can. You can do anything on a Mac that you can do on a PC. Just hold down Apple for 5 seconds, hit banana-banana, and then spin around in a circle while holding you head on the “tygh” cluster of keys. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/256 "2006-05-25T16:16:15Z")
> [@Draelin](#): > > Wait till you get to the point where everything at LB is a little too big, and everything everywhere else is a little too small. That precise spot is the low end of my constantly-fluctuating weight range. (And when you add the fact that even petite sizes are three to four inches too long for me, you understand why I hate clothes shopping. 🙂 ) Heh. I’m looking forward to that point, and at least I won’t have the length issues, Og be praised. My ambition is not to be skinny by any means, but healthy. Anyway, to paraphrase _King of Queens,_ I don’t have a thin-girl head. I know just whom I will force to shop with me, too. Though the last time we did that, I didn’t buy anything, and he did. Hee hee. ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/257 "2006-05-25T16:19:21Z")
> [@Telperien](#): > > And I was worried that this would be a bad day. I have a lot of other stuff to do, like faxing a whole bunch of papers to a company so they will talk to me, and buying some khakis. I haven’t found decent khakis anywhere. Except Lane Bryant, and theirs are just what I’m looking for, but a bit more than this cheapskate wants to pay. I’ve lost weight, but not enough yet to move from the fat chick stores. You just may find that thrift stores can be your friend in this quest. Most of my work and work-in-the-yard wardrobe comes from the ones around here. And I look spiffy. And not to pry, **Rifty** and **Spats** , but after 20-some years of therapy, shouldn’t you have reached the point where you don’t need it anymore? ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/258 "2006-05-25T16:22:20Z")
**Rose and Spats** , I meant. Oh, never mind. ---
**Author:** ![Telperien](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/65b543/32.png) [@Telperien](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telperien)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/259 "2006-05-25T16:26:05Z")
**Sean,** that’s not a bad idea. I hadn’t even considered it, since I generally have not found my size in thrift stores, but I’ll look into it. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2006, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715/260 "2006-05-25T16:29:01Z")
> [@Sean Factotum](#): > > And not to pry, **Rifty** and **Spats** , but after 20-some years of therapy, shouldn’t you have reached the point where you don’t need it anymore? I used to have multiple personalities, but we’re okay now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715.md?page=12) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mmp-garage-sales-an-early-fathers-day-and-a-birthday-party/357715.md?page=14)