# Modern Family 1/5/2011 **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 6, 2011, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577 "2011-01-06T03:52:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/21 "2011-01-07T17:12:12Z")
I love Cougar Town too. It’s nothing like it was in the beginning. I started watching it a while back and thought I’d check out the earlier episodes. It’s like the entire premise changed completely. ---
**Author:** ![sco3tt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@sco3tt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sco3tt)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/22 "2011-01-07T18:26:26Z")
> [@Morbo](#): > > The whole “could care less,” “head is literally going to explode” scene was hilarious. But, yet, the joke that preceded it was my favorite. I also like that the Luke character is showing some depth, after serving almost two seasons as a human punchline to everyone else’s scenes. What’s his beef with the cops all about? ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/23 "2011-01-07T18:41:11Z")
> [@Disheavel](#): > > the greatest “Luke, I am your father” line ever! What I absolutely loooved about that was Claire’s reaction. As soon as Phil said “Luke, I am your father” Claire smirked and said “Ahh, that brings back old/good memories” before Phil explained it (complete with a reference to Claire’s ‘ladyparts’). What I _expected_ was for him to say it and then halfway through the explination for Claire to rip the megaphone out of his hands and say, in a nasty tone of voice, “Wasn’t funny then, not funny now”. That smirk made the scene for me. It was a “This is why I married him” moment. ---
**Author:** ![gytalf2000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ac91a4/32.png) [@gytalf2000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gytalf2000)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/24 "2011-01-07T18:53:21Z")
> [@Quimby](#): > > I don’t bother with the 8 O’Clock shows but Cougar Town is at least as funny as Modern Family. It got much better over time so it you tried it early on and didn’t like it, give it another shot. I enjoy Cougar Town quite a bit, myself! ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/25 "2011-01-07T19:58:02Z")
This episode kinda annoyed me because there wasn’t really any reason for the main Dad to not tell his wife that his client was the speeder. Sit-coms usually over-rely on the “web of lies” trope, but at least they usually try and give the characters _some_ vaguely plausible reason to hide the truth. Here, the only reasons seemed to be that a) the dad was a sit-com character and b) sit-com characters always lie to their loved ones so that hilarious hijinks may ensue. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/26 "2011-01-07T20:04:33Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > This episode kinda annoyed me because there wasn’t really any reason for the main Dad to not tell his wife that his client was the speeder. Sit-coms usually over-rely on the “web of lies” trope, but at least they usually try and give the characters _some_ vaguely plausible reason to hide the truth. Here, the only reasons seemed to be that a) the dad was a sit-com character and b) sit-com characters always lie to their loved ones so that hilarious hijinks may ensue. I figured that if he told his wife his client was the speeder, then Claire would approach her, make an ugly scene and it would somehow come out that she was Phil’s wife, causing the client to seek out another Realtor. It was mentioned that the home was selling for about $1.2 million, certainly not chump change, especially in today’s market. ---
**Author:** ![Simplicio](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/27 "2011-01-07T20:18:53Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > I figured that if he told his wife his client was the speeder, then Claire would approach her, make an ugly scene and it would somehow come out that she was Phil’s wife, causing the client to seek out another Realtor. It was mentioned that the home was selling for about $1.2 million, certainly not chump change, especially in today’s market. Only if Claire’s insane. Loosing the commission on the house would obviously cost the family a lot of money, and they even stress that its important to Phils career above and beyond just the Comission money (I think it makes him “top salemen” or something). And the speeder wants Phil to help her _move out of the neighborhood_ as quickly as possible, pretty much solving Claires problem. Plus if she really needs to, she can just wait till the sale is closed to go after her nemesis. Plus, given the energy that she’s putting into it, its pretty obvious that Claire is going to confront the speeder as some point whether Phil tells her or not. He’s obviously better off telling her whats at stake then waiting for her to freak out on the speeder and farking up his sale. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/28 "2011-01-07T20:27:53Z")
> [@Simplicio](#): > > Only if Claire’s insane. Loosing the commission on the house would obviously cost the family a lot of money, and they even stress that its important to Phils career above and beyond just the Comission money (I think it makes him “top salemen” or something). And the speeder wants Phil to help her _move out of the neighborhood_ as quickly as possible, pretty much solving Claires problem. Plus if she really needs to, she can just wait till the sale is closed to go after her nemesis. True, but she was out there with a bullhorn, and actually making the effort to print signs and put them up around the neighborhood. If she was this determined to get the speeder, there’s no guarantee (at least in Phil’s mind) that she would just quietly sit back until the place sold. And yeah, she found out anyway, but I’m guessing Phil was counting on making a quick sale (after all the seller made a point of saying she wanted to unload the house fast so as not to have a lot of people coming in and poking around). ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/29 "2011-01-07T20:35:55Z")
Yes, if Phil thought the speeder would be around indefinitely, he would have told Claire. But Claire is often insane (remember the family photo episode), so it’s perfectly plausible that Claire would have gone after her anyway even knowing that it would cost Phil a large commission. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/30 "2011-01-07T20:43:16Z")
Claire is kind of insane though. ---
**Author:** ![Pashnish\_Ewing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8797f3/32.png) [@Pashnish\_Ewing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pashnish_Ewing)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/31 "2011-01-07T20:46:42Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > Yes, if Phil thought the speeder would be around indefinitely, he would have told Claire. But Claire is often insane (remember the family photo episode), so it’s perfectly plausible that Claire would have gone after her anyway even knowing that it would cost Phil a large commission. Especially considering she was using ‘what about the children’ as a thin excuse for her vigor in going after the speeder. That would be enough for her to justify crushing Phil’s dream of top salesman (and missing out on the cash). ---
**Author:** ![fuzzypickles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/9d8465/32.png) [@fuzzypickles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fuzzypickles)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/32 "2011-01-07T21:32:23Z")
_“There’s a stranger in our hot tub! Call 911!”_ [extremely hot guy stands up] _“Hmm, let’s at least say hello first…”_ And FTR: Sophia Vergara is orders of magnitude hotter than Jami Gertz ever was (including her _St. Elmo’s Fire_ peak.) ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/33 "2011-01-07T21:53:08Z")
> [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](#): > > I just now realized that by being grabbed (by Claire) while riding a bike, Gloria’s deepest, darkest fears about cycling came true…😛 > > (I also really liked the “laces, mirror, bell” bit, knowing that Jay’s method has remained constant over 30 years) The grabbing scene, especially after the build-up, reminded me of _Arrested Development_. Personally you can keep Jami Gertz and Sophia Vergara for hotness factor, but let’s get James Marsden to join the cast. What was the name of the “non touching massage” New Age thing he was doing, because I’m sure it’s a real thing? ---
**Author:** ![pancakes3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ba9def/32.png) [@pancakes3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pancakes3)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/34 "2011-01-07T21:53:49Z")
> [@Pashnish\_Ewing](#): > > Especially considering she was using ‘what about the children’ as a thin excuse for her vigor in going after the speeder. That would be enough for her to justify crushing Phil’s dream of top salesman (and missing out on the cash). definitely crazy enough to say “oh phil… what’s more important? our children/morals/principles? or money? i’m not going to let her get away with this.” which… if you know enough stay-at-home PTA moms, is not too crazy to be plausible. ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/35 "2011-01-07T21:56:53Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > The grabbing scene, especially after the build-up, reminded me of _Arrested Development_. > > Personally you can keep Jami Gertz and Sophia Vergara for hotness factor, but let’s get James Marsden to join the cast. What was the name of the “non touching massage” New Age thing he was doing, because I’m sure it’s a real thing? Reiki I’m almost positive it’s been used as the butt of jokes in a similar fashion in at least one other sitcom. Seinfeld comes to mind, but I don’t think that was it. ---
**Author:** ![h.sapiens](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e0b2c6/32.png) [@h.sapiens](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/h.sapiens)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/36 "2011-01-07T22:07:07Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > The grabbing scene, especially after the build-up, reminded me of _Arrested Development_. > > Personally you can keep Jami Gertz and Sophia Vergara for hotness factor, but let’s get James Marsden to join the cast. What was the name of the “non touching massage” New Age thing he was doing, because I’m sure it’s a real thing? [Reiki therapy.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reiki) Mitchell was right to be skeptical. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/37 "2011-01-07T22:28:25Z")
Reiki is probably one of those things that works much better depending on the attractiveness and amount of clothing worn by the administrator. And it’s very true that if you are gay or a straight woman you’d be less likely to call the cops on James Marsden than on Steve Buscemi. Marsden is actually a good actor. You believed this guy as both a genuinely enthused New Age hippie and as a nutjob who really doesn’t see anything wrong with sleeping in a child’s playhouse without permission. “Oh my God you are LIVING in here?” “Shhh shhh shhhh inside voices…” I loved when Cameron kicked him out and his response was “Well that’s going to make dinner really awkward!” ---
**Author:** ![MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c0e974/32.png) [@MPB\_in\_Salt\_Lake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MPB_in_Salt_Lake)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/38 "2011-01-07T22:30:02Z")
> [@fuzzypickles](#): > > _“There’s a stranger in our hot tub! Call 911!”_ > [extremely hot guy stands up] > _“Hmm, let’s at least say hello first…”_ > > And FTR: Sophia Vergara is orders of magnitude hotter than Jami Gertz ever was (including her _St. Elmo’s Fire_ peak.) I don’t doubt your judgement in women, but I am almost certain that Jami Gertz was not in St. Elmo’s Fire… There were indeed three stunning brunettes in St, Elmo’s—Demi Moore, Ally Sheedy and Andie MacDowell, all of whom are more attractive (or at least WERE more attractive back then, I guess I really haven’t seen Ally Sheedy or Andie MacDowell in many years) than Sophia Vergara is… ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/39 "2011-01-07T22:45:52Z")
> [@pancakes3](#): > > definitely crazy enough to say “oh phil… what’s more important? our children/morals/principles? or money? i’m not going to let her get away with this.” > > which… if you know enough stay-at-home PTA moms, is not too crazy to be plausible. Not so crazy that John Irving didn’t do exactly the same thing more than 30 years ago in _The World According to Garp_. When Garp had writer’s block, he became a crazy, overprotective husband and father who chased speeders in his neighborhood. One of the speeders turned out to be the mother of one of his sons’ friends. As a matter of fact, my first reaction was not that Claire was nuts, or that the entire thing was implausible, but that they lifted the bit directly from TWATG. ---
**Author:** ![Batsinma\_Belfry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea5d25/32.png) [@Batsinma\_Belfry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Batsinma_Belfry)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2011, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577/40 "2011-01-08T00:11:14Z")
> [@Ruby Sees](#): > > I thought it was great. Probably the best of the season. I was giggling my ass off all alone. Second best for me. The “Baby Cheeses” episode made me almost pop my stitches from the surgery I had the day before. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-family-1-5-2011/566577.md?page=3)