# Modern hat etiquitte **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 10, 2008, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400 "2008-06-10T02:57:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![The\_Them](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/898d66/32.png) [@The\_Them](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Them)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2008, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/21 "2008-06-11T05:32:17Z")
**Naja** , I can’t speak for everywhere, but hats (mostly baseball caps) are pretty common around me, and nobody looks at you funny or anything, not even in better restaurants. I have several hats; my cowboy hats are my favorite, but in some indoor places, the brim can get in the way. In any case, I _would_ get some funny looks if I wore barettes or a hairband. Even a headband only works in certain milieus. And getting hair in your mouth is a drag, especially when you’re eating. And yeah, sure, I could get a haircut. But why? I honestly like the way it feels, and it doesn’t hurt anyone. My hair and hats aren’t to offend anybody, aside from your James Dobson types, though it expresses solidarity with a certain mindset. In not too much more time, my hair should be long enough to make a headband _out of the hair itself._ This sort of thing goes over great at a Dead tribute show! But this is all about hats. Mine have practical as well as stylish functions. ---
**Author:** ![Eggerhaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d2c977/32.png) [@Eggerhaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eggerhaus)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2008, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/22 "2008-06-11T07:08:49Z")
My father, 85, _hates_ hats. ☹ My adult son and I wear them a lot. 🆒 One of my father’s favorite conversations with hat wearers is as follows: Dad: “You ought to have two hats like that…” Hat wearer: “Why?” Dad: “So you can shit in one and wipe your ass with the other.” I can’t wait until I’m 85… ---
**Author:** ![NajaNivea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NajaNivea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NajaNivea)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2008, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/23 "2008-06-11T12:53:05Z")
[QUOTE=The Them] nobody looks at you funny or anything, not even in better restaurants. [/QUOTE] Well, one of the rules about good manners is that you don’t go around correcting other people’s manners. If I saw you with a baseball cap in a nice restaurant, I’d think it was rude and disrespectful, but I’d never say anything to you or anyone else. [QUOTE=The Them] In any case, I _would_ get some funny looks if I wore barettes or a hairband. Even a headband only works in certain milieus. And getting hair in your mouth is a drag, especially when you’re eating. And yeah, sure, I could get a haircut. But why? I honestly like the way it feels, and it doesn’t hurt anyone. … But this is all about hats. Mine have practical as well as stylish functions. [/QUOTE] And yet, women everywhere manage to do just fine without headbands, haircuts, or hats indoors. 😉 I’m only gently teasing. There’s nothing wrong with your hair. My own is getting to be a bit absurd at mid-thigh length, so I’d be the last one to harass you about getting a haircut. I would, however, be secretly channeling **Zsofia** ’s mom if you ever came to my house for dinner. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2008, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/24 "2008-06-11T17:58:59Z")
[QUOTE=Myself] I never take my hat off because if I do, my pet monkey will escape. [/QUOTE] That’s the part I forgot to mention. Even if you are a magician, when offstage, keeping a small animal in your hat is bad form, in my book. I think I read that elevator thing wrong. The double negative threw me off. If any of you are thinking of taking up fedora-wearing, I should warn you about something. If you wear a fedora into a breast bar, at least one dancer will grab your hat to wear onstage. A dancer may even think to jam both of her breasts inside the hat, and dance around that way. It must be dancer code for, “nice hat, sweetheart.” With that in mind, you have to wonder; why is it, you hear a$$hat all the time, but nobody says t t-hat. Or is that (_)(_)hat? ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2008, 11:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/25 "2008-06-11T23:23:34Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] If you wear a fedora into a breast bar, at least one dancer will grab your hat to wear onstage… [/QUOTE] Yes, a friend of mine lost a hat that way. Although, since the hat in question was a beret, perhaps it was all for the best. 😃 (Not a military beret… just an unfortunate french-style one). ---
**Author:** ![Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spectre_of_pithecanthropus/32/12343_2.png) [@Spectre\_of\_Pithecanthropus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spectre_of_Pithecanthropus)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2008, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/26 "2008-06-12T18:01:47Z")
[QUOTE=mbh] My dad grew up in farm and ranch country, in an era when our state still had more horses than automobiles. The rule he taught me was “A gentleman always removes his hat indoors, or in the presence of a lady.” That nonsense about keeping your hat on is a Baby Boomer’s act of rebellion, and is emphatically NOT part of the traditional etiquette. [/QUOTE] In traditional etiquette between male and female, the lady is treated in some ways like a social superior–evident in a number of things like rising when a lady enters the room, “ladies first”, and so on. In the British upper classes, too, daughters of Earls, who can use the title Lady are one step ahead of their brothers who are mere “Honorables”. So, back to hats: Was it not once the custom that when encountering a high superior, like a King or what have you, you were expected to bare your head and bow at the same time? And when outdoors, I think the gentleman is merely expected to briefly lift his hat briefly when he meets a lady, or even symbolically just slightly nod and touch the brim. But I do think this is a vestige of the whole bowing and head-baring gesture. This thread makes me wish I lived in a more hat-friendly environment. As I said, it’s almost never cold enough to wear one comfortably; our climate here makes it hard to wear the kind of classic clothes, such as suits, that look so good with hats. ---
**Author:** ![ratatoskK](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ratatoskk/32/2987_2.png) [@ratatoskK](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratatoskK)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2008, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/27 "2008-06-12T19:05:41Z")
[QUOTE=The Them] **Naja** , I can’t speak for everywhere, but hats (mostly baseball caps) are pretty common around me, and nobody looks at you funny or anything, not even in better restaurants. [/QUOTE] As **NajaNivea** said, it’s because they’re polite and won’t correct a stranger’s behavior. Personally, I have not seen men wearing baseball caps in “better” restaurants, but have seen them in other restaurants, and it looks really uncouth. ---
**Author:** ![Alex\_Dubinsky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dbc845/32.png) [@Alex\_Dubinsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alex_Dubinsky)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2008, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/28 "2008-06-12T22:51:18Z")
Why is wearing hats a matter of etiquette and “rude and disrespectful” if you don’t take it off? Especially at dinner, where it’s like a hairnet and sort of hygienic? I think people would take off hats indoors because their heads would get warm. If you didn’t, you were weird. It’s like if you wear a coat in a restaurant. But rude and disrespectful? ---
**Author:** ![Alex\_Dubinsky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/dbc845/32.png) [@Alex\_Dubinsky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alex_Dubinsky)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2008, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/29 "2008-06-12T22:56:37Z")
btw, I think taking off your hat when bowing is so that the king could see your eyes/face (not your bald spot). ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2008, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400/30 "2008-06-12T23:02:27Z")
[QUOTE=Alex\_Dubinsky] Why is wearing hats a matter of etiquette and “rude and disrespectful” if you don’t take it off? Especially at dinner, where it’s like a hairnet and sort of hygienic? I think people would take off hats indoors because their heads would get warm. If you didn’t, you were weird. It’s like if you wear a coat in a restaurant. But rude and disrespectful? [/QUOTE] Why is anything a matter of etiquette? Were you here for the Incredible Shoes On/Off In the House debacle? (If not, were you aware that Canada is WEIRD?) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-hat-etiquitte/452400.md?page=1)