# Modern Manners, aka Standing In The Way **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 19, 2020, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681 "2020-01-19T23:16:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [January 20, 2020, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/41 "2020-01-20T21:46:14Z")
Reminds me of the time back in the 80’s when I was in the left-hand turn lane at a traffic light. I was about two cars back of the lead car. The light changed and he turned left. Meanwhile, an oncoming car turned right, and as they are both in the intersection, they discover that they know each other. What to do? Why, stop where they are and begin a conversation! Which went on and on. I didn’t bother honking, as everyone else was doing that. The conversationalists just kept talking for at least two minutes, finally resolving matters to their satisfaction and driving on. ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/42 "2020-01-21T00:04:43Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > That’s a very very long story just to point out people stop at the top of escalators. Welcome to the 21st century. > > Just plow through them. What else can you do? Time and escalators wait for no man. If I was brief, I’d be on Twitter. ---
**Author:** ![Jeff\_Lichtman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jeff_lichtman/32/1531_2.png) [@Jeff\_Lichtman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jeff_Lichtman)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/43 "2020-01-21T04:46:05Z")
Stopping at the top of an escalator isn’t just rude, it can be dangerous, especially when it’s crowded. It doesn’t take much to make a bunch of people tumble down a flight of moving metal stairs. Obliviousness makes me nuts. There are people who seem to look for the narrowest spots to leave their shopping carts, and if they can’t find one, they park their carts sideways to ensure no one can get past. There are those who converge on the one lane to get out of a parking lot only to jam it up so no one can move, like The Three Stooges trying to get through a door. There are the people who cluster around the demo station at Trader Joe’s, because obviously no one else wants a free sample. There are the people who park in driveways so their cars stick out and block the sidewalk, because pedestrians can always walk out into the street where they belong. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/44 "2020-01-21T14:16:53Z")
And when your transaction at the cash register is finished, please move your ass. Don’t stand there having a phone conversation, sending a message, or whatever it is people do while standing there after there transaction is completed. I have to stand there doing nothing until you are gone and even if there is no one on line behind you, I still have things to do. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/45 "2020-01-21T17:21:33Z")
My experience in North America was in the 20th century. I recall no episode similar to that which OP describes. > [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > That’s a very very long story just to point out people stop at the top of escalators. Welcome to the 21st century. > > Just plow through them. What else can you do? Time and escalators wait for no man. Are you saying American social behavior is different now, in the 21st century? (Your own “Just plow through them” suggests you’re no stickler for 20th-century etiquette.) Is today’s behavior generally worse lately in, e.g. scenarios like OP describes? If so, the shift is _opposite_ to what I’ve observed in the Land of Smiles. Here, good road manners etc. are much _better_ now than they were two decades ago. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/46 "2020-01-21T17:36:23Z")
I’m on a bus that stops at the bus stop. The person gets on the bus and proceeds to stand on the stairs and continue texting, holding up the bus, the driver and all the passengers I was tempted to call 911 and report her for mass kidnapping! If that ain’t rude (and illegal) I don’t know what is. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/47 "2020-01-21T19:22:14Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > I have to stand there doing nothing until you are gone and even if there is no one on line behind you, I still have things to do. At the very minimum you should say one of your oh-so-clever comments that the entire store breaks out in applause. ---
**Author:** ![TimfromNapa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d26b3c/32.png) [@TimfromNapa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TimfromNapa)\ **Post date:** [January 21, 2020, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/48 "2020-01-21T20:17:54Z")
> [@Llama\_Llogophile](#): > > Ugh, I started a thread about this kind of thing a while back. I’m becoming convinced there are people put on this Earth whose only purpose is to get in my way in public places. They apparently live for the chance to stand still in a traffic area, as the OP describes. Or get in front of me and then drive or walk as slowly as possible. Or walk several people abreast such that nobody can pass. But my favorite has to be people who walk diagonally - you get ready to pass them, then they lazily change direction and you have to go around the other way. > > I’m frequently struck by the feeling that we are really bad at designing public spaces in which people need to move. Part of this seems to be that malls, airports and such seem to be purposely obstructing walking paths with advertising signs. Is it me, or is that relatively recent? I don’t remember it years ago when malls were more of a thing. At airports the goddam TSA takes over huge swaths of walking space for their lines and create bottlenecks, to say nothing of gate areas that can’t remotely hold the number of people getting on the plane (Boston Logan, I’m looking at you…). > > In any case, I make an effort to be aware of the traffic around me when I’m walking, and especially when I’m STOPPING. I wish we had more firm social conventions about this. There should be a word for this phenomenon, where a group of people cluster right in the middle of a thoroughfare, oblivious to or unconcerned about the fact they are causing an obstruction. I’ve encountered this often on shared use bike/pedestrian trails. The last time a family group was stopped in the middle of a trail and ignored my bell I simply squeezed by and said to the dad, “You have a good day…Douche!” I had to chuckle thinking that at least one of his children would ask him, “Daddy, what’s a douche?” ---
**Author:** ![Kimstu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecd19e/32.png) [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/49 "2020-01-22T02:15:13Z")
> [@septimus](#): > > Are you saying American social behavior is different now, in the 21st century? IME the cell-phone/headphones phenomenon has resulted in a net increase of obliviousness in public places. But I’d say it has also produced a net decrease in irritation/confrontation levels, as people encountering an irritating situation are more likely to just go on their phone/music/whatever while waiting for it to resolve. There are always some easily angered types, but I’d say that overall people are less quarrelsome with strangers. ---
**Author:** ![saucywench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/85e7bf/32.png) [@saucywench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/saucywench)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/50 "2020-01-22T02:43:14Z")
> [@TimfromNapa](#): > > There should be a word for this phenomenon, where a group of people cluster right in the middle of a thoroughfare, oblivious to or unconcerned about the fact they are causing an obstruction. I’ve encountered this often on shared use bike/pedestrian trails. The last time a family group was stopped in the middle of a trail and ignored my bell I simply squeezed by and said to the dad, “You have a good day…Douche!” I had to chuckle thinking that at least one of his children would ask him, “Daddy, what’s a douche?” ^:D Similar to a murder of crows, etc., we could call them… An aggravation of obliviots. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/51 "2020-01-22T04:25:16Z")
I hate to meet at a end of a grocery aisle. The opposing cart driver stops and says come on out. No I’m trying to turn your way, just keep moving, please. I’m not gonna walk through a pack of people, I don’t want to touch those people. OP, in the escalator I’m not sure what I would’ve done. I know I would not like any of the choices you mention. Elevators are a big phobia for me. If I have a choice I take the stairs. One of my fears is people not letting me get off. Every person went to elementary school. We all learned to walk down a hall orderly. Why does this go away in a public place? ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/52 "2020-01-22T06:32:46Z")
> [@TimfromNapa](#): > > There should be a word for this phenomenon, where a group of people cluster right in the middle of a thoroughfare, oblivious to or unconcerned about the fact they are causing an obstruction. I’ve encountered this often on shared use bike/pedestrian trails. The last time a family group was stopped in the middle of a trail and ignored my bell I simply squeezed by and said to the dad, “You have a good day…Douche!” I had to chuckle thinking that at least one of his children would ask him, “Daddy, what’s a douche?” I’d call them a “clot,” because they’re behaving exactly like an arterial blockage. "My progress was slowed by a clot of people blocking the sidewalk. " ---
**Author:** ![Pardel-Lux](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pardel-lux/32/20182_2.png) [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 9:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/53 "2020-01-22T09:46:43Z")
I can whistle. I do it seldom, but when I have to, I can reach over 100 dB at close range. I use two fingers (thumb and index finger) of one hand and it works. Being male and about 6’ 4" also helps. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Pardel-Lux](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pardel-lux/32/20182_2.png) [@Pardel-Lux](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pardel-Lux)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 10:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/54 "2020-01-22T10:49:44Z")
This [magpie](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yzWZvlax2DM)has a similar trick, only better. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/55 "2020-01-22T15:36:29Z")
> [@saucywench](#): > > An aggravation of obliviots. I am so using the word “obliviot” from now on. It annoys the hell out of me that something on a screen is now more important than real life. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/56 "2020-01-22T15:49:14Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > My local Shop Rite has aisles wide enough for two people, yet people stand there in the middle with their carts blocking all traffic I don’t understand it. Move to the side, idiot. This one irks me. Happens every time I shop. I will say ‘excuse me’ and the person will move and look a little embarrassed. I nod politely, but I can’t thinking ‘why did it not occur to you that other people exist and will want to use the aisle also’? ---
**Author:** ![BrickBat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac91a4/32.png) [@BrickBat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrickBat)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/57 "2020-01-22T17:11:07Z")
This one involves more of sitting in the way. I go to refuel at a gas station, the usual one I go to. It has 3 pump islands, able to refuel two cars each side of the island. It was quite crowded, with a few vehicles waiting to pull up to a pump as others leave. Anyway, I take station by one of them, and notice one car has been sitting there a good long time. Finally, said owner of vehicle comes out of convenience store and gets in the vehicle. I begin inching toward it in anticipation of his departure…but departure never comes. Several minutes go by, but by then the vehicle at the pump in front of him leaves, so I maneuver and get into that spot at the pumps. As I’m refueling, I notice the original driver: he’s just sitting in the driver’s seat take the phone down from his ear and begin dicking around with his phone. Finally several _more_ minutes later, he finally leaves. I gave him a glare and he just looked back nonplussed. I was mad for the next half hour at how some can have absolutely zero self-awareness. I’ve seen the same thing happen before other times, but this was the most egregious display of selfishness I’ve seen at a filling station. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/58 "2020-01-22T18:49:23Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > And when your transaction at the cash register is finished, please move your ass. Don’t stand there having a phone conversation, sending a message, or whatever it is people do while standing there after there transaction is completed. I have to stand there doing nothing until you are gone and even if there is no one on line behind you, I still have things to do. **IN** line. That is all. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/59 "2020-01-22T19:02:32Z")
_Checks location_ People in the NJ/NY area stand and wait ON line. That is all. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 22, 2020, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681/60 "2020-01-22T19:22:26Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > I’d call them a “clot,” because they’re behaving exactly like an arterial blockage. > > "My progress was slowed by a clot of people blocking the sidewalk. " See post #36. I am entitled to royalty payments. 🙂 > [@kaylasdad99](#): > > IN line. > [@Annie-Xmas](#): > > ON line. Doesn’t matter to me, but would you like your purchase in a sack?\* \*Midwesternism. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/modern-manners-aka-standing-in-the-way/846681.md?page=4)