# Mods/Admins, seriously stop it with the "Pls help, I need money" threads. **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [August 13, 2012, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333 "2012-08-13T01:57:47Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/81 "2012-08-14T03:34:27Z")
> [@jackdavinci](#): > > So if you are worried about being scammed, just ignore those threads. I’d agree with that for the most part with one caveat. That in those threads it is pefectly acceptable to question the reasons for asking for the money as well as arguing why said person does not “deserve” the money. Neither behavior in my opinion should be construed as either thread shitting or the poster asking the hard questions being told “if you don’t like it don’t participate”. Consider it as a group sanity check I suppose. If you need/want the help that bad you can suck it up. I guess you can sorta do that now, but I don’t think it has been codified that such behaviours are perfectly acceptable in such threads. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/82 "2012-08-14T03:34:50Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > I’m not seeing a serious conflict between Marley’s and Dex’s statements. We do vet requests to the extent we can, but we can’t do any serious investigation beyond what people tell us. So if it’s not an overt request to run a scam then it gets approved? ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/83 "2012-08-14T03:35:06Z")
> [@aldiboronti](#): > > Any misgivings I may have had about this have been entirely dispelled by **TubaDiva** ’s post. I wouldn’t argue with a word of it. This _is_ a community and that’s what community members do, help each other out in times of trouble. Sure, the generosity of members could be taken advantage of, but we have the admins and mods as our first line of defense and anyway Dopers are a pretty astute bunch and I fancy it wouldn’t be easy to pull the wool over their eyes for long. I would argue with it. To me right now it’s in some sort of untenable middle ground. Permission has to be asked but they really don’t check and buyer beware. IMHO which will be ignored is either they reserve these threads to those that are in desperate need such as critical health problems or eviction or something like that or just opening a sub-forum and let anyone ask. I don’t expect the mods to be detectives and ensure the 100% accuracy of the problem but there needs to be a consistent level of need for the begging posts or just let them all happen and have the dopers make up their own minds. > [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > Hell, I even joked about it in MPSIMS recently! I’d prefer people keep their facts straight, though, but that’s also my fault for not being clear in the first place. > > I’ll shut up now. FTR I certainly don’t hold it against you and I’m glad you can joke about it now. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/84 "2012-08-14T03:50:50Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > So if it’s not an overt request to run a scam then it gets approved? That’s not what I said. We evaluate requests on a case by case basis. I’m not going to discuss hypotheticals, since the specific case is what’s going to matter. Really, although there have been several such threads lately, we don’t have all that many of them in total. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/85 "2012-08-14T04:04:55Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > Since it looks like CK is opening the flood gates now I’ll just automatically ignore any pleas. I would otherwise have been inclined to help with those in genuine need. You would intentionally hurt people you would otherwise have helped because you didn’t get your way on a message board? You somehow think such an unethical stance is going to change anyone’s mind here? Because that is what it seemingly boils down to: ethical people versus selfish people. The former can’t stand the idea of one legitimate cause being left out. The latter can’t stand the idea of one illegitimate idea taking up their time–the super long amount of time it takes to read a freaking post. The Dope is not here to do your thinking for you. The mods are not going to coddle you and decide for you what deserves your attention and what doesn’t. What surprises me most though is that **Fenris** of all people is on the “coddle me” side. EDIT: And why in the world don’t you just pit the people who do something you don’t like? Oh, wait, such pit threads often go awry. So you’re jumping to the mods to force your opinions. Funny how that was a horrible idea when it was done about Bo’s catchphrase. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/86 "2012-08-14T04:09:38Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > That’s not what I said. We evaluate requests on a case by case basis. I’m not going to discuss hypotheticals, since the specific case is what’s going to matter. > > Really, although there have been several such threads lately, we don’t have all that many of them in total. Ok, fair enough. If it continues hopefully it evolves to the point where there are some known guidelines. ---
**Author:** ![Beastly\_Rotter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/45deac/32.png) [@Beastly\_Rotter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beastly_Rotter)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/87 "2012-08-14T06:40:51Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > Ok, fair enough. If it continues hopefully it evolves to the point where there are some known guidelines. They need Heart, Drive and Hustle. They’re my three miniature schnauzers; anyone who volunteers to walk all three of them gets the dough. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/88 "2012-08-14T07:00:44Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > Really, although there have been several such threads lately, we don’t have all that many of them in total. How many do there have to be before concerns like those expressed by **Shakes** and **Fenris** get taken seriously? ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/89 "2012-08-14T08:38:36Z")
Oh for goodness sakes people. It is tres simple. On a messageboard that has become a virtual community, why shouldn’t members be able to ask for help? We ask for medical advice, psychological assistance, building tips, recipes…and for some of us sometimes financial help is needed. If you don’t want to assist, don’t. But don’t shit on the person needing that help by denying them the right to ask. I have helped a couple of members who were experiencing difficult times (because I was able to at the time). And I don’t regret it one iota. Some requests have raised my eyebrow a few centimetres, but it is my choice to help or not as the case may be. It isn’t rocket surgery…let the mods vet requests (so that blow-ins aren’t able to do a shifty begging routine) but let the longer term members have the opportunity to ask for help as needed. See? Simple!! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/858c86/32.png) [@Mame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mame)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 9:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/90 "2012-08-14T09:21:18Z")
What **Kam** said. ---
**Author:** ![Cicero](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cicero/32/3594_2.png) [@Cicero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cicero)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/91 "2012-08-14T10:42:08Z")
Obviously begging requests need to go to the Market Place. Only legitimate requests, need to be a member and seen by folks with green stuff to spend. Problem solved. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/92 "2012-08-14T11:35:38Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > That’s not what I said. We evaluate requests on a case by case basis. I’m not going to discuss hypotheticals, since the specific case is what’s going to matter. > > Really, although there have been several such threads lately, we don’t have all that many of them in total. That’s kind of the point. Such requests were rare. When they were allowed it was for dire need. The bar seems to have been lowered considerably. Hence the thread. You can allow all of them without approval and I wouldn’t care a bit. I just would or wouldn’t open them. As with many of these threads it’s more about inconsistencies in enforcement or a perceived unannounced change in the rules. > [@BigT](#): > > You would intentionally hurt people you would otherwise have helped because you didn’t get your way on a message board? You somehow think such an unethical stance is going to change anyone’s mind here? > > Because that is what it seemingly boils down to: ethical people versus selfish people. The former can’t stand the idea of one legitimate cause being left out. The latter can’t stand the idea of one illegitimate idea taking up their time–the super long amount of time it takes to read a freaking post. > > The Dope is not here to do your thinking for you. The mods are not going to coddle you and decide for you what deserves your attention and what doesn’t. > > What surprises me most though is that **Fenris** of all people is on the “coddle me” side. > > EDIT: And why in the world don’t you just pit the people who do something you don’t like? Oh, wait, such pit threads often go awry. So you’re jumping to the mods to force your opinions. Funny how that was a horrible idea when it was done about Bo’s catchphrase. I know you are the self appointed moral authority on the board. You suck at your job. The occasional plea for a dire emergency will get my attention and help if possible. Increasing numbers of threads asking for money for problems that are less dire than most of my normal days will make such requests fade into background noise. It’s as simple as that. ---
**Author:** ![GrandWino](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grandwino/32/67_2.png) [@GrandWino](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrandWino)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/93 "2012-08-14T13:18:06Z")
The only guideline that I feel should be implemented is a requirement to add “Donation Solicitaion” or something similar to the thread title so that we know what the thread is before we open it. That will make it easier to ignore the thread if you’re that averse to them. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/94 "2012-08-14T13:50:48Z")
I read this whole thread. I don’t agree the mods should vet anything beyond checking to make sure it’s not outright a scam. Why shouldn’t Dopers be allowed to ask? It’s YOUR job to not give if you don’t like the idea. Likewise, Dopers should be allowed to call out the people who ask, in the thread (provided they follow the rules of the forum). I also think a “Donation Solicitation” title would be appropriate. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/95 "2012-08-14T13:54:59Z")
> [@Loach](#): > > The occasional plea for a dire emergency will get my attention and help if possible. Increasing numbers of threads asking for money for problems that are less dire than most of my normal days will make such requests fade into background noise. It’s as simple as that. Agreed. If we set a high bar, some needy folks will likely get some relief. If we set a low bar, a random selection of people will get less relief, IMO. I’m not sure I would donate any money under the former system, but I definitely won’t donate under the latter. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/96 "2012-08-14T13:55:09Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I read this whole thread. I don’t agree the mods should vet anything beyond checking to make sure it’s not outright a scam. Why shouldn’t Dopers be allowed to ask? It’s YOUR job to not give if you don’t like the idea. Likewise, Dopers should be allowed to call out the people who ask, in the thread (provided they follow the rules of the forum). Because we don’t want MPSIMS to turn into the Begging Forum, and if people see that others are posting “send me money for [non-emergency reason]” threads and getting cash as a result, I promise you it will. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/97 "2012-08-14T13:59:08Z")
“I lost my job unexpectedly, the car gave its last gasp and my wife left me-looking for enough to pay the mortgage this month.” = appropriate. “I wanna do X but don’t have the funds this minute-help me out please” = not appropriate. If anyone ever posts again about the entitlement attitude of the millennial generation, I’m going to laugh in their face. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/98 "2012-08-14T14:01:30Z")
> [@MsWhatsit](#): > > Because we don’t want MPSIMS to turn into the Begging Forum, and if people see that others are posting “send me money for [non-emergency reason]” threads and getting cash as a result, I promise you it will. I guess it doesn’t bother me that much. Sometimes I think it’s fun to hear people criticize, even harshly, the stupid requests of other people. Regardless, if it’s a dumb cause, it will either drop off the front page pretty quick, or we’ll get a nice yelling match where people tell exactly how stupid their request is. ---
**Author:** ![Moonlitherial](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/4bbf92/32.png) [@Moonlitherial](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moonlitherial)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/99 "2012-08-14T14:25:31Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally Posted by Marley23 > We do vet all threads of this type, and we’re trying that much hard to evaluate them carefully after the bunny thread. … We can’t do very much to prove the people asking for money are telling the truth, and for that reason and because it’s just good common sense, we’ve always encouraged people to think carefully about these situations and come to their own conclusions. > [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](#): > > ON THE TOPIC: Sorry to disillusion y’all, but (generally speaking) mods don’t do any serious vetting of requests beyond superficial levels. We can’t – we don’t have the resources or the time to check whether someone is expressing a legitimate need or not. We don’t ask for bank statements, sworn affadavits, or a credit check. We just take the person pretty much at their word. > [@Colibri](#): > > I’m not seeing a serious conflict between Marley’s and Dex’s statements. We do vet requests to the extent we can, but we can’t do any serious investigation beyond what people tell us. While I understand that you don’t see the conflict between those statements **Marley’s** in isolation led some to believe that more vetting was being done than **CK’s** suggests. I don’t have an issue with the mods not vetting the requests, it always seemed like an impossible job BUT if there’s not any vetting at all being done we’d actually be better off without mod permission being required because that assumption would go away and people would understand that they were responsible to ask questions themselves. Also other people might understand that asking questions of someone requesting donations doesn’t make you the devil or unsympathetic just someone who would like to help without feeling robbed later. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2012, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333/100 "2012-08-14T14:31:04Z")
I don’t care if someone wants money to pay for hookers and blow as long as there up front in asking for it. I would like to know when a ‘mod approved’ request for money is made: A. That it’s a member. Then the mods claim they at least have a valid email address for the person B. That the mods have read the OP and know what will actually be asked for and why [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-admins-seriously-stop-it-with-the-pls-help-i-need-money-threads/631333.md?page=6)