# Mods, just what does a moderator do? **URL:** \ **Category:** About This Message Board\ **Created:** [May 25, 2002, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817 "2002-05-25T18:29:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2002, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/1 "2002-05-25T18:29:16Z")
Aaah, yes, that question the mailboy in your company asks you innocently. That question that a supervisor asks you, and you just wanna smack him. Beyond the publicly visible side of Modship (i.e. popping into threads to make sure the mudslinging isn’t getting too rough, moving threads, etc. . .), what do you do with threads? Since my posts appear near-realtime onto threads, I assume that you don’t queue up posts to proofread them or deny them. Is there some little box that you click on to indicate ‘Yep! I read it. He’s OK!’. But there’s got to be more than that, unless I’m simply misguided. Is there a statement-of-work or job description you have to read and sign under? Is there a li’l blurb in the local papers looking for help from the want-ads? Tripler Really, just curious. ---
**Author:** ![bibliophage](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bibliophage/32/7615_2.png) [@bibliophage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bibliophage)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2002, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/2 "2002-05-25T18:34:24Z")
I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you. And the goat. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2002, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/3 "2002-05-25T18:36:47Z")
Aw man, not the goat . . . ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2002, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/4 "2002-05-25T20:43:19Z")
Oh, George, not the livestock! ---
**Author:** ![Arnold\_Winkelried](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Arnold\_Winkelried](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Arnold_Winkelried)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2002, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/5 "2002-05-26T00:21:06Z")
The board could be set up so that each post would have to be approved before it is publicly available, but given the high volume of posting and the lack of paid moderators, it would be unfeasible to implement that feature at the SDMB. A set of guidelines is sent to people who join the staff. There is also a probation period and on-the-job training. And of course the **perks**! But the confidentiality agreement prevents me from revealing what those are. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2002, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/6 "2002-05-26T06:36:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Arnold Winkelried \* > \*\*But the confidentiality agreement prevents me from revealing what those are. \*\* Duly noted. I’ll politely shut up now. . . 😃 Tripler One card short of a full deck. ---
**Author:** ![Derleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2002, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/7 "2002-05-26T07:03:36Z")
I imagine they read all (or nearly all) the posts in a given forum, paying particular attention to some topics (gravity bongs in GQ, abortion in GD, bannedfests in The Pit) that are known to bring the nuts out of the scrotum, so to speak. Then they do what they deem is needed to maintain this message board. I guess I’ll add the obligatory Flaming Freemason Illuminati (So Mote It Be) Monkey reference here. It seems to make them so happy: 🙂 Then, when the day is over, they set aside a certain time to sacrafice pit threads, Tug-Ahoys, and pieces of Bo Diddley’s undies to Flaming Freemason Illuminati Monkeys as they _seig heil_ pictures of Stalin and play _La International_ to a picture of Hitler. After all, they have an image to maintain. ---
**Author:** ![handy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b5a626/32.png) [@handy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handy)\ **Post date:** [May 26, 2002, 11:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/8 "2002-05-26T23:28:46Z")
Wow, Tripler,you have been here two years already, who knows, you might be asked to join their secret society sometime. I moderate a UBB board with around 76,000 members & most of our time is spent deleting messages, warning users, putting messages in the right forum, Etc. We don’t get any instructions–but we have a few super secret forums of our own, visible only to us, which we use to manage users & forums. Basicially I just learn it reading what UBB board instructs mods to do. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/9 "2002-05-27T05:55:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by handy \* > \*\*Wow, Tripler,you have been here two years already, who knows, you might be asked to > join their secret society sometime. \*\* Yeah, only if Cecil ever needs a one-man _Straight Dope SWAT Team_. 😃 So, I gather there is no wrong or right to modship, but it’s more of keeping the boards on the right track. . . Tripler Kinda like a driver keeping a car from hitting the walls. ---
**Author:** ![C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b2d939/32.png) [@C\_K\_Dexter\_Haven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/C_K_Dexter_Haven)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/10 "2002-05-27T14:36:57Z")
\<\< So, I gather there is no wrong or right to modship, but it’s more of keeping the boards on the right track. . . \>\> Mostly, but there are Rules that cover most contingencies, such as 42(b)(vii)(1) that prevents us from telling you explicitly what we do. ---
**Author:** ![grimpixie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecb155/32.png) [@grimpixie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grimpixie)\ **Post date:** [May 27, 2002, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/11 "2002-05-27T15:46:20Z")
I think they drink coffee quite a bit of the time - they keep refering to these mugs… 😕 😉 Gp ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/12 "2002-05-28T02:53:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by C K Dexter Haven \* > \*\*Mostly, but there are Rules that cover most contingencies, such as 42(b)(vii)(1) that prevents us from telling you explicitly what we do. \*\* I figured as such, 'specially from **bibliophage** and **Arnold**. However my open employment still stands. Should Cecil need a _SWAT Team_ . . . 😃 Tripler Seems I’ve delved into deep deeeeeeeeep waters. ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 8:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/13 "2002-05-28T08:23:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by C K Dexter Haven \* > \*\*Mostly, but there are Rules that cover most contingencies, such as 42(b)(vii)(1) that prevents us from telling you explicitly what we do. \*\* I see Dex has forgetten about Rule 42(b)(vii)(2) which explicity prevents us from telling you what Rule 42(b)(vii)(1) is. ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 10:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/14 "2002-05-28T10:15:16Z")
Goddammit, now the CK Dexter Haven and the Eutychus programs are going haywire, making explicit references to Rules 42(b)(vii)(2) and 42(b)(vii)(1) when Rule 42(b)(vii)(0.447.999.123.456) explicitly forbids it. I’m just going to have to format their drives and reinstall the Moderator program… dammit, when is vB going to release the Mod 3.0 update patch? ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [May 28, 2002, 10:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/15 "2002-05-28T10:27:37Z")
No pooftas! ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [May 29, 2002, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mods-just-what-does-a-moderator-do/110817/16 "2002-05-29T04:11:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dijon Warlock \* > \*\*No pooftas! \*\* No Whammies, no Whammies, no Whammies… Tripler DAMN! Outta luck.