# Mom has horrible table manners and it drives me crazy **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 9, 2011, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007 "2011-08-09T00:00:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/41 "2011-08-11T08:09:31Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > Why does working require driving? In most of the US, you simply can’t get to work without a car. That includes most urban areas, where you’re lucky if a bus passes every hour. I suspect my grandmother may have some sort of ADHD… she sucks at paying attention, had hyperfocus until a lifetime with a husband who couldn’t be trusted shattered it and can’t stand or sit still for more than five minutes. She’s also doing the “grab the food with her hand” thing, but didn’t start that until she was over 90. It sounds to me like your mom’s enormously unhappy with her lot in life and throwing a constant tantrum at it rather than figuring out what can she change, **what do I write here**. I hope you can move out soon (I know it’s not always easy even if it’s economically feasible, my own culture expects unmarried children of any age to live with the parents). ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/42 "2011-08-11T13:37:38Z")
> [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](#): > > Eh, I’m not getting the great outrage over the dog food thing, if it was dry kibble. There’s really not much of anything on the spoon after putting it in kibble, just dust really. And, possibly, [salmonella](http://www.livescience.com/8439-dry-pet-food-linked-human-salmonella-outbreak.html). If you’re going to use the same utensils with dry pet food and human food, you wash them well in between. Doing otherwise is disgusting and dangerous. ---
**Author:** ![rogerbox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/76d3ee/32.png) [@rogerbox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rogerbox)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/43 "2011-08-11T15:42:24Z")
How about the fact that I wouldn’t want my HUMAN potatos to TASTE like DOG FOOD? I don’t understand how that is hard to understand. Sorry about your mother, I definitely would not eat in that environment. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/44 "2011-08-11T17:02:27Z")
I thought the week I spent with my food smacking friend was driving me nuts. My sympathies. If she can move around why don’t you grab your plate and leave the area. ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/45 "2011-08-11T17:04:34Z")
> [@rogerbox](#): > > How about the fact that I wouldn’t want my HUMAN potatos to TASTE like DOG FOOD? I don’t understand how that is hard to understand. If you’re eating human potatoes, I’d say their tasting like dog food should be one of the least of your concerns. But even cannibals are entitled to have standards of sanitation, I guess. ETA: Have you ever been in the kitchen when she’s cooking? If she’s putting spoons she just used to scoop dog food directly into the mashed potatoes, and grabbing food with her hands, her cooking is probably not done in a safe and sanitary way. I’d be surprised if she does those things and also handles raw meat and poultry correctly to prevent cross-contamination, keeps things at safe temperatures, etc. I’d be very wary of eating there, and be on the lookout for food poisoning. ---
**Author:** ![rogerbox](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/76d3ee/32.png) [@rogerbox](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rogerbox)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/46 "2011-08-11T17:47:33Z")
^That’s another reason the story about the dog food squicked me out so much. If she cannot have the common sense to know that people do not want dog food in their human food, I don’t trust her sanitation practices. In fact, I was living in a situation very similar to the OP: I lived with mom, stepdad and MUCH younger little sister, and I started eating dinner in my room because of how uncomfortable the dinner table was, plus I was DONE eating my stepfather’s food when he was in the bathroom long enough that he was definitely going #2, but did not turn the faucet on to wash his hands, then proceeded to work on dinner. The thinking nothing is wrong with mixing dog and human food, and fussing over the dogs seems like she probably just prefers her animals to problematic humans I would think. ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2011, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/47 "2011-08-12T01:14:26Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > Why does working require driving? > [@Nava](#): > > In most of the US, you simply can’t get to work without a car. That includes most urban areas, where you’re lucky if a bus passes every hour. How about working from home? Going by bicycle? From what we know so far I simply don’t believe she’s trying. ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2011, 1:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/48 "2011-08-12T01:20:56Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > How about working from home? Going by bicycle? From what we know so far I simply don’t believe she’s trying. I’m telling you, it sounds like passive-aggression to me. ---
**Author:** ![Bridget\_Burke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7cd45c/32.png) [@Bridget\_Burke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bridget_Burke)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2011, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/49 "2011-08-12T01:27:49Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > How about working from home? Going by bicycle? From what we know so far I simply don’t believe she’s trying. If she has fainting spells, a bicycle wouldn’t be a good idea. And it sounds as though she has issues that might work against any kind of employment. If possible, the OP needs to move out. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2011, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007/50 "2011-08-12T05:06:35Z")
The fact that she’s your mom and you don’t want to be rude or hurt her feelings has to be terrible. And just having to be around atrocious manners in and of itself is bad. Add them together and it sounds like an impossible situation. I don’t know what you can do other than just never eat at home. That’s probably not terribly realistic though. Bad table manners and eating piggishly are two things I just can’t tolerate. I had a friend stay over the other night, and I made bacon and pancakes in the morning. She was in the living room eating hers while I was still making mine, and I could hear her chomping and talking with her mouth full from all the way in there! I knew I couldn’t be in the room with her eating like that, much less eat my own food at the same time, so I just took my sweet time in the kitchen until I knew for sure she was done. Heh, I love her to death, but dear god that was disgusting.😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-has-horrible-table-manners-and-it-drives-me-crazy/592007.md?page=2)