# Mom is dying. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 19, 2007, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820 "2007-02-19T16:29:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![Baron\_Greenback](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/baron_greenback/32/48_2.png) [@Baron\_Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baron_Greenback)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/101 "2007-02-20T22:48:07Z")
Try and be with your siblings **Bosda**. ---
**Author:** ![meek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce73a5/32.png) [@meek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/meek)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/102 "2007-02-21T00:04:51Z")
Some pains cannot be shared. My deepest sympathy. . ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/103 "2007-02-21T02:08:28Z")
When my mother died recently I learned that there really is nothing anyone can say to make you feel better, but that they say something at all somehow helps. Take care. It will hit you in waves but you’ll pull through and she would want you to. ---
**Author:** ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 7:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/104 "2007-02-21T07:24:05Z")
I’m so sorry, **Bosda**. My condolences to you and your family. ---
**Author:** ![MerryMagdalen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c2a13f/32.png) [@MerryMagdalen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MerryMagdalen)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 10:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/105 "2007-02-21T10:56:43Z")
{{{ **Bosda** }}} ---
**Author:** ![Girl\_From\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/3da27b/32.png) [@Girl\_From\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Girl_From_Mars)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 11:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/106 "2007-02-21T11:26:49Z")
So sorry to hear that **Bosda**. I hope you and your family are doing OK. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/107 "2007-02-21T13:27:06Z")
I’m doing better than I thought I would when this time came. ---
**Author:** ![phall0106](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phall0106/32/5934_2.png) [@phall0106](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phall0106)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/108 "2007-02-21T13:34:09Z")
**Bosda** , I’m so sorry to hear about the passing of your mother. ---
**Author:** ![Kitchen\_Wench](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f08c70/32.png) [@Kitchen\_Wench](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kitchen_Wench)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/109 "2007-02-21T14:04:41Z")
Oh **Bosda**. I can’t begin to express how sorry I am for your loss. Like Sampiro, I experienced waves of grief… along with sorrow, numbness and anger when my dad died in 2002. I was on a roller coaster for weeks. But as time went on, the waves weren’t as strong and overwhelming. Not to say I wouldn’t give anything just to see him one last time right now. I miss him terribly. Remember that being strong when someone so close to us dies doesn’t necessarily mean being stoic. If the tears come, let them. If you need to talk, do so. I’m sorry,\*\* Bosda\*\*. If I were in your neck of the woods, I’d bring you a casserole and a great big hug Take care… ---
**Author:** ![LonesomePolecat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a88e57/32.png) [@LonesomePolecat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LonesomePolecat)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/110 "2007-02-21T14:39:16Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor] I’m doing better than I thought I would when this time came. [/QUOTE] I lost my mom to lymphoma back in August. I feel for you, and hope and pray for you and your siblings. ---
**Author:** ![Cub\_Mistress](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ea666f/32.png) [@Cub\_Mistress](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cub_Mistress)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/111 "2007-02-22T00:46:13Z")
Bosda, I’m so sorry for your loss. It is obvious how much you love your mom. She must have been a wonderful woman. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/112 "2007-02-22T01:24:25Z")
I’m truly sorry, Bosda. I wish you all peace and comfort and strength. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/113 "2007-02-22T18:04:46Z")
Memorial ceremony in an hour. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/114 "2007-02-22T18:21:01Z")
Good luck, kind sir. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/115 "2007-02-22T20:28:26Z")
Memorial’s over. Old friends of the family we hadn’t seen in years turned out. Nobody broke down. Nothing but the empty spot in life, now. Bye, Mom. I love you. ---
**Author:** ![badkittypriestess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/8baadc/32.png) [@badkittypriestess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/badkittypriestess)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/116 "2007-02-22T20:38:41Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor] Memorial’s over. Old friends of the family we hadn’t seen in years turned out. Nobody broke down. Nothing but the empty spot in life, now. Bye, Mom. I love you. [/QUOTE] {{sends hugs to Bosda}} ☹ ---
**Author:** ![vivalostwages](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/d07c76/32.png) [@vivalostwages](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vivalostwages)\ **Post date:** [February 22, 2007, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/117 "2007-02-22T20:38:51Z")
**Bosda** , this is a very vulnerable time for you and yours, physically as well as emotionally. I gently suggest that you take it easy for a while, don’t push yourself, pamper yourself if you want. It takes a while but it will get better. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2007, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/118 "2007-02-23T02:02:20Z")
[QUOTE=vivalostwages] **Bosda** , this is a very vulnerable time for you and yours, physically as well as emotionally. I gently suggest that you take it easy for a while, don’t push yourself, pamper yourself if you want. It takes a while but it will get better. [/QUOTE] We’ve been following that advice, except for my Brother-in-Law & my Sister. They left for Florida today, to attend the funeral of my B-I-L’s Grandmother. We’ve tried to give him all the support we can. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2007, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/119 "2007-02-23T02:15:40Z")
Miscellaneous suggestions: Have a friend of the family collect her clothing to donate to Goodwill (or whoever), don’t do it yourself. For some reason this was the hardest part for me (I think perhaps the scent of the items) and it is for others, so don’t do it yourself. Keep some items for sentimental sake but store them away. Some accounts (especially at credit unions) automatically include small life insurance policies. (One of my mother’s bank accounts had a $2,000 policy and one of her credit cards had a $1,000 policy.) Whoever serves as executor should ask about these as often the insured doesn’t know about them. Make copies of her photograph collections so that you and your siblings can each have them. There’ll be times when you’re annoyed at how quickly and calmly (coldly it may seem) you’ve accepted her death. Don’t beat yourself up over it, because it offsets the times nothing-in-particular will jog a memory that leaves you staring into space. If she had any especially cherished collections (for my mother it was porcelain flowers and glass dolphins) they make wonderful gifts for family friends. Above all take care of yourself and be grateful for the time you had together. She sounds like a wonderfully selfless and caring woman. ---
**Author:** ![newcrasher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/b3f665/32.png) [@newcrasher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/newcrasher)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2007, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820/120 "2007-02-23T02:29:15Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor] She’s dead. [/QUOTE] Peace on you and your family. God bless your wonderful mother. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/mom-is-dying/392820.md?page=7)