# Monday Monkey Post: A Very Monkey MMP **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** mmp\ **Created:** [August 30, 2010, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949 "2010-08-30T01:59:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/21 "2010-08-30T12:46:39Z")
Sadly I’ve little experience with monkeys either. In fact, the sum total was hanging out at an Anchorage establishment called Darwin’s Retreat who’s logo featured a monkey sitting on an encyclopedia and studying a human skull, pondering no doubt our strange lack of brow. With the catchphrase _“A smart monkey doesn’t monkey with another monkey’s monkey”_ it’s obvious they were quite capable of higher learning. That monkey with a stick photo was amusing. I couldn’t decide if he was trying to protect the other monkey or make off with a nifty leisure suit. ---
**Author:** ![RalfCoder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@RalfCoder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RalfCoder)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/22 "2010-08-30T13:24:13Z")
Damned little monkey experience here, too. A kid I went to school with had a big brother with a pet spider monkey. His dad was career military, or diplomatic corps, or some such, and they had traveled all over the world. Somewhere they got the monkey, and brought it home to Michigan. This was back in the 60’s, when you could bring things like that through customs. Try carrying a live monkey through customs now, and you’ll have to grease someone’s palm with a lot of bananas. Of course, if you tried to come through customs with a Monkee then, you’d have to deal with tons of screaming teeny-bopper girls, so maybe the spider monkey was a better deal. Ya wants another monkey story? It’s the only other one I got. Hokay… we were in a zoo somewhere when I was a teenager, and there was a monkey in a cage. Remember when you could buy bubble gum in a little cloth bag? It looked like gold nuggets. I had me some, and I held it up by the cage. Why? I dunno… I was a teenage boy then. My brain hadn’t grown in yet - wouldn’t for a good 10 years or so. Any way, that monkey ignored my little bag of gum completely, until I was close enough. Then a little hairy arm shot out, snagged my gum, and disappeared faster than you could say, “W…”? Monkeys is fast! And monkeys won’t give back your gum, either. I got my revenge by imagining him trying to blow a bubble, and getting sticky gum all over his whiskers. That’ll show the gum-grabbing little goomer! ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/23 "2010-08-30T14:51:14Z")
> [@SpazCat](#): > > … > > Trunk Monkey! Oh, it is a happy Monday! > > I like Wile E’s monkey with a stick photo too. > > Although I know both Stick Monkey and Trunk Monkey are technically apes. But “ape” isn’t as fun to say as “monkey.” “Ape” is just…plain. Boring. One-syllabic. But “monkey,” that’s a word! Monkeymonkeymonkeymonkeymonkey. > > I leave you all with [Bathroom Monkey](http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/310504/). > > MONKEY! I was using “monkey” as a generic term for any primate because as you said “monkey” is more fun to say. In some other thread, I commented that I knew the subject was actually a chimp so don’t correct me for calling it a monkey. So someone corrected me anyway and stated that it was perfectly okay to use monkey as a generic term for any primate. Ugh, that was the monkey and frog thread! I thought I had finally blocked that from my mind. ---
**Author:** ![VunderBob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/839c29/32.png) [@VunderBob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VunderBob)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/24 "2010-08-30T15:13:18Z")
Oddly relevant to today’s [OP and the MMP in general](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/southafrica/7969313/Drunk-baboons-plague-Cape-Towns-exclusive-suburbs.html)… ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/25 "2010-08-30T15:32:19Z")
> [@VunderBob](#): > > Oddly relevant to today’s [OP and the MMP in general](http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/southafrica/7969313/Drunk-baboons-plague-Cape-Towns-exclusive-suburbs.html)… From the article: > [@](#): > > Last week, a 12 year old boy was left traumatised after confronting a troop who had broken into his family home. > Hearing noises from the kitchen, he went to investigate and found the beasts ransacking cupboards. When the child fled upstairs to find his babysitter, three males gave chase and surrounded him as he made a tearful phone call to his mother, while the animals pelted him with fruit. > “When he called me he was terrified. They had him surrounded,” said the Constantia housewife, who did not wish to be identified. They pelted him with fruit? If the baboons had been in a car it would have been a drive-by fruiting. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/26 "2010-08-30T15:44:01Z")
> [@Wile\_E](#): > > So, please share your own monkey-musings or remembrances or just monkey about in this very monkey MMP. > > … and have a banana. Terrific OP!!! Even though I had fair warning I have little to add. One is my favorite bumper sticker that shows a platypus humping a monkey and says “Hey Uncle Darwin!” and the other is that I once told the father of an unruly child “Control your monkey or I’m calling the zoo”. > [@Hockey\_Monkey](#): > > You can’t have a Very Monkey MMP without me, so here I am. 😃 WOOHOO!!! The various Trunk Monkey mentions reminds me ------ a friend called his son his Truck Monkey because the boy always got the inside job of packing and unpacking for camping trips. Our first trip to Indy we saw one of the Trunk Monkey dealerships and got the lad all kinds of gifts and shirts and stuff with the monkey on them. Just in case it was him moon-lighting. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![peedin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peedin/32/14095_2.png) [@peedin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peedin)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/27 "2010-08-30T16:02:08Z")
I love monkeys, and apes. I recently learned that monkeys have tails and apes don’t. So chimps really are apes but I still think of them as monkeys. My nephew doesn’t like monkeys (or apes). He said (and I quote) “I find monkeys disturbing.” Needless to say I gave him quite a few monkey birthday cards. A few years back I had nothing to do on a Saturday so I made a sock monkey for myself. He is the cutest thing and I named him Sockmonkey Underpants. He lives with little sockmonkey Carl, and a stuffed moose named Monty. The commerical with the trunk monkey offering the cop a donut, then a handful of money, is all sorts of awesome. ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/28 "2010-08-30T16:02:25Z")
Monkeys!!! Hi guys! I just put in a request for Friday off, so I’m gonna have four days off this weekend! w00t! (Our server is going to be down for maintenance anyway.) C’mon, Firday… ---
**Author:** ![Misnomer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misnomer/32/14897_2.png) [@Misnomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Misnomer)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/29 "2010-08-30T16:09:27Z")
Mike was my favorite Monkee, too. I never had any imaginary friends, but there was a time in my young life when I would sometimes pretend that I was talking to Ponch and Jon (from [CHiPs](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0075488/)). I wound up having a crush on Jon, but wasn’t pretending to talk to him anymore by then. _grin_ I went to a piano bar with a friend on Saturday night, and sent the pianist on a trip down memory lane when I asked to sing “The Little Blue Man” (an old novelty song first recorded by Betty Johnson). I think I’ll add that one to my repertoire, and will get the sound guy (who is the pianist’s son) to be the “little blue man” for me in future. 🙂 There were a lot of singers that night, so I only got to do two other songs: I picked “Night in Tunisia” and “Never Will I Marry.” It was a lot of fun, and it was nice to sing publically for the first time in three weeks. I might go to another piano bar this Friday (same pianist, different location), but lately I’m wishing that my vocal workshop was starting again sooner than 9/23! Yesterday I didn’t do much in the morning, but in the afternoon I vacuumed 2/3 of the house, went to the grocery store, and took Bailey to the dog park. None of the other regulars were there, and it was kind of hot, but I found a shady spot where there was just enough of a breeze to be pleasant and I talked a little with a couple of the other dog owners. We stayed for about 45 minutes. Last night I watched two really good documentaries via Netflix streaming: _[Tales from the Script](http://jadetiger.com/talesfromthescript/)_, wherein several Hollywood screenwriters discuss their experiences, and _[The Butch Factor](http://www.thebutchfactor.com/)_ (totally SFW), about definitions of masculinity among gay men. Both were compelling and informative/thought-provoking. Good stuff. This should be a pretty good, if quiet, week for me. My boss is having a birthday/farewell party on Saturday (she’s turning 40, and will be going to Djibouti for a year at the end of next month), but I’m not sure yet if I’ll go to it. We’re not very close, and I kind of dread events with a lot of co-workers where I’ll have to pretend to be glad to be there. Plus the location is kind of a pain in the butt to get to. The good thing is that if I _don’t_ go, there can’t really be any social/political repercussions because she’s leaving. 😉 Right now I’m telling everyone that I’ll be there, but I may back out Saturday morning (I think I feel a cold coming on… _cough_). ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/30 "2010-08-30T17:12:16Z")
What no monkey jokes! Where should a monkey go when he loses his tail? To a retailer! Why don’t monkeys play cards in the jungle? Too many cheetahs running around! Thank You! I’ll be here all week. Try the waitstaff and don’t forget to tip the veal. ---
**Author:** ![RalfCoder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@RalfCoder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RalfCoder)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/31 "2010-08-30T17:30:15Z")
> [@swampbear](#): > > Thank You! I’ll be here all week. Try the waitstaff and don’t forget to tip the veal. Hey, no cow-tipping allowed, **Swampy**. This is a monkey MMP!! ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/32 "2010-08-30T18:13:22Z")
I need to go home and play Monkey Island. Where’s Guybrush Threepwood when you need him? ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/33 "2010-08-30T18:14:06Z")
I called my friend today and sang ‘Happy Birthday’ to her… Except her birthday isn’t until Wednesday. Woops!!! :smack: She said, ‘Oh, you’re calling me early, huh,’ and I said, ‘Yes, it’s the _birthday season_.’ :rolleyes:😛 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/34 "2010-08-30T18:21:59Z")
[Peter Sellers] It’s _minkey!_ [/Peter Sellers] ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Onimous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ea5d25/32.png) [@Ann\_Onimous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Onimous)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/35 "2010-08-30T18:57:22Z")
> [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](#): > > She said, ‘Oh, you’re calling me early, huh,’ and I said, ‘Yes, it’s the _birthday season_.’ :rolleyes:😛 Of course! Everyone needs a birthday season! Why limit it to just one day? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/36 "2010-08-30T19:30:51Z")
Monkeys!!! True fact: When we bought our house five years ago, my wife, scoffing at my decorative tastes, said I get only one room in the house to decorate and decreed it would be the downstairs washroom, aka:the powder room. It’s done in MONKEY!!! Pictures, posters, statues, a monkey-with-an-erection shot glass, Curious George books, clocks… Last count I had 37 monkeys in the room. Also, an announcement: It’s [Cuervo’s](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=335117) Birthday!!! [Obligatory pictures.](http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/bg51XxCTRvWfWIfqeNaKhA?feat=directlink) [First day](http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/qMbmKIoUSHVR6EuR9caxUw?feat=directlink) [His first date](http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/HynzAJKy46fN4pvZzY0u7g?feat=directlink) [A King and his castle](http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/nVXYTASr5pq6qWh4qeg-Sg?feat=directlink) ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/37 "2010-08-30T19:41:54Z")
:mad: ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/38 "2010-08-30T19:51:04Z")
Happy Birthday Cuervo! I couldn’t see the pics though. I visited JDD’s Brother a little bit ago. He’s in good spirits especially for someone who will shortly undergo a combo of chemo and radiation. The good news is the doctor feels the cancer was discovered soon enough to treat it. The bad news is all the chemo and radiation therapy. So, good thoughts and prayers would still be very much appreciated. He likes that all my “imaginary internet friends” (though some of you I’ve seen and/or talked to) are thinkin’ about him. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/39 "2010-08-30T20:03:56Z")
Just remember: Someday monkey won’t play piano song, play piano song. ---
**Author:** ![FairyChatMom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fairychatmom/32/21906_2.png) [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)\ **Post date:** [August 30, 2010, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949/40 "2010-08-30T20:35:01Z")
OK, you alleged Monkees fans, let’s get this straight. It’s [Micky Dolenz](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Micky_Dolenz)- no e before the y. I want you to write it 100 times and promise never to spell it wrong again. And anyway, Micky was \*my \*boyfriend, so you can’t have him. 😛 Otherwise, very spiffy OP - ya done good! 😃 Home - I worked an hour over today. Sketties for supper. Gotta feed the canines now. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monday-monkey-post-a-very-monkey-mmp/551949.md?page=3)