# Monfort: Care to make a wager with the Devil? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 27, 2000, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572 "2000-10-27T07:11:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/1 "2000-10-27T07:11:09Z")
No, not for your soul. For your sig! Taking a cue from another _ahem_ friendly wager placed elsewhere, I am laying down the gauntlet. My Giants will destroy your Iggles this weekend in Giants Stadium, just like we beat you in your own house. I am on a roll against you, pal: I kicked your ass last week in The Teeming Minions Fantasy Football League (with two positions open, I must add!) and, of course, my beloved Yankees thwarted your evil thoughts by winning yet ANOTHER World Series, in a battle of your two worst nightmare teams. So, let’s have this game be the icing on my cake of defeating you, eh Cheesesteak breath? Now then, the stakes: The winner will write a sig file for the loser. The loser must use this sig file for 100 posts. Anything within the SDMB rules can be in this sig file, and it has to be reasonable length - if a Moderator says it is too long, it’s too long. So how about it, tough guy? You in? * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) _TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING: Six months, two weeks, four days, 5 hours, 11 minutes and 56 seconds. 8048 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,006.08. Extra time with Drain Bead: 3 weeks, 6 days, 22 hours, 40 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/2 "2000-10-27T07:19:20Z")
Don’t do it, Montfort!! Oh, this can only end badly… (Satan, a dollar says he’s sleeping or something.) ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/3 "2000-10-27T07:40:23Z")
The game isn’t until Sunday, dearie. If he’s sleeping THAT long, he’s got worse problems than my wager… 🙂 * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) _TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING: Six months, two weeks, four days, 5 hours, 40 minutes and 56 seconds. 8049 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,006.18. Extra time with Drain Bead: 3 weeks, 6 days, 22 hours, 45 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![Silver\_Fire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e4f/32.png) [@Silver\_Fire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Silver_Fire)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/4 "2000-10-27T07:45:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Satan \* > **The game isn’t until Sunday, dearie.** Yep. I know. I’m just saying that you probably won’t get a response from him until sometime after the sun comes up. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![SPOOFE](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c5a1d2/32.png) [@SPOOFE](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SPOOFE)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/5 "2000-10-27T08:08:42Z")
I’ll bet with you, Satan! I… wait a minute… Sig lines?!? I thought that said “sex lives”… ---
**Author:** ![Falcon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/49beb7/32.png) [@Falcon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Falcon)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/6 "2000-10-27T13:58:39Z")
Can’t imagine what gave Satan this idea… 😉 (And according to Yahoo Messenger, Montfort is in fact still asleep.) ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/7 "2000-10-27T14:46:46Z")
Okay, beelezebub, you’re on. **The Eagles will beat the Giants** , straight up (no point spread – although I’m sure it’d only help me – I’m that confident), on Sunday. I can’t wait to see a sig that says something like… > [@](#): > > Yer pal, > [Satan](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=43890) > > TIME ELAPSED SINCE THE EAGLES WHIPPED THE GIANTS: > Three months, four days, 5 hours, 40 minutes and 56 seconds. > _8049 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,006.18._ > Extra time acknowledging Montfort’s football prognisticating supremacy: Three months, four days, 5 hours, 40 minutes and 56 seconds. I’m gonna have to think of something for that “cigarettes not smoked” line, but I’m sure I’ll think of something ere Sunday 7:15pm. Of course, I’m open to advice, folks. Remember, too, the last person to make a football-related bet with me. Whammo? How’s Anniz doing? 🙂 (BTW, Satan, there are **two** _t_s in my name. Just not next to each other. And, I have no elephant books.) ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/8 "2000-10-27T18:16:27Z")
The sig is for one hundred posts, not one hundred days. So, I’ll have to revise the rules: No test posts (except to test out your new sig, of course) No post padding There’s no cheesesteak on my breath, either. Unless it’s a tofu cheesesteak. ---
**Author:** ![Gazoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ce73a5/32.png) [@Gazoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gazoo)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/9 "2000-10-27T18:32:04Z")
**Montfort** - Perhaps instead of the # of cigarettes line, you should change it to “Number of Posts in which I have Praised Montfort’s football knowledge supremacy.” Or something to that effect. Go IGGLES!!! ---
**Author:** ![Anniz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cc9497/32.png) [@Anniz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anniz)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/10 "2000-10-27T19:49:59Z")
Go **Eagles** , goooooooooo!!! I hope you don’t lose your sig **MOntfort** :)🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/11 "2000-10-27T19:54:51Z")
New rules? Trust me - I would not change my posting style for any wager, mustard-on-pretzel face. Besides, this is not a wager that I plan on losing… As for you **Gazoo** , I am already smiting you. Don’t push your luck, Jimmy The Geek! * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) \*I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Six months, two weeks, four days, 17 hours, 59 minutes and 40 seconds. 8069 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,008.75. Extra life with Drain Bead: 4 weeks, 25 minutes. \*_THE YANKEES WIN! THAAAAAAH YANKEES WIN! 1996 · 1998 ··· WORLD CHAMPIONS ··· 1999 · 2000 26 Titles! The #1 Dynasty of all-time! And most importantly… RULERS OF NYC!!_ ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/12 "2000-10-27T19:58:46Z")
Now I really hope I win, just to get rid of that obnoxious (but typical New Yawkah) addition to you sig you added today. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/13 "2000-10-27T20:17:28Z")
Imagine how obnoxious it’ll look as your sig! 😃 * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) \*I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Six months, two weeks, four days, 18 hours, 22 minutes and 22 seconds. 8070 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,008.83. Extra life with Drain Bead: 4 weeks, 30 minutes. \*_THE YANKEES WIN! THAAAAAAH YANKEES WIN! 1996 · 1998 ··· WORLD CHAMPIONS ··· 1999 · 2000 26 Titles! The #1 Dynasty of all-time! And most importantly… RULERS OF NYC!!_ ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/14 "2000-10-27T20:23:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Satan \* > **Imagine how obnoxious it’ll look as your sig! 😃** And that’s all I’ll be doing is **imagining** it. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/15 "2000-10-27T21:35:59Z")
Trust me, Montfort… I’ve heard your music. You don’t have that vivid an imagination… * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) \*I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Six months, two weeks, four days, 19 hours, 40 minutes and 57 seconds. 8072 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,009.10. Extra life with Drain Bead: 4 weeks, 40 minutes. \*_THE YANKEES WIN! THAAAAAAH YANKEES WIN! 1996 · 1998 ··· WORLD CHAMPIONS ··· 1999 · 2000 26 Titles! The #1 Dynasty of all-time! And most importantly… RULERS OF NYC!!_ ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/16 "2000-10-27T22:15:59Z")
Well, I guess it’s good then that I don’t need to have a vivid imagination in order to think about your sig being under my name. After all, it’s rather shallow and immature. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/17 "2000-10-27T22:35:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Montfort \* > > **Well, I guess it’s good then that I don’t need to have a vivid imagination in order to think about your sig being under my name. After all, it’s rather shallow and immature.** I don’t need a critical review here, Monty! I said that I already heard your music… * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) \*I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Six months, two weeks, four days, 20 hours, 40 minutes and 23 seconds. 8074 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,009.31. Extra life with Drain Bead: 4 weeks, 50 minutes. \*_THE YANKEES WIN! THAAAAAAH YANKEES WIN! 1996 · 1998 ··· WORLD CHAMPIONS ··· 1999 · 2000 26 Titles! The #1 Dynasty of all-time! And most importantly… RULERS OF NYC!!_ ---
**Author:** ![Montfort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Montfort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Montfort)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/18 "2000-10-27T22:36:54Z")
Hey, you started with the criticism. And, that music is the past now. ---
**Author:** ![Lloyd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/2acd7d/32.png) [@Lloyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lloyd)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/19 "2000-10-27T22:43:32Z")
I say you bet Satan starting up smoking again. It only seems fair. ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2000, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572/20 "2000-10-27T22:56:08Z")
Um… No? :wally * * * Yer pal, [Satan](http://www.members.tripod.com/jmspoofe/sdmb/satan.jpg) \*I HAVE BEEN SMOKE-FREE FOR: Six months, two weeks, four days, 21 hours, 1 minute and 5 seconds. 8075 cigarettes not smoked, saving $1,009.38. Extra life with Drain Bead: 4 weeks, 55 minutes. \*_THE YANKEES WIN! THAAAAAAH YANKEES WIN! 1996 · 1998 ··· WORLD CHAMPIONS ··· 1999 · 2000 26 Titles! The #1 Dynasty of all-time! And most importantly… RULERS OF NYC!!_ [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monfort-care-to-make-a-wager-with-the-devil/38572.md?page=2)