# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1)
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218
**Category:** Thread Games
**Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 100
### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 26, 2012, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1981 "2012-11-26T17:50:26Z")
Well, I mean, we’ve got two children, and we’ve had sexual intercourse twice.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 26, 2012, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1982 "2012-11-26T17:55:48Z")
Well, that’s where we take a new baby out of a lady’s tummy.
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 26, 2012, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1983 "2012-11-26T17:59:35Z")
Good evening, Your Holiness.
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### Author:  [@Runestar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Runestar)
#### Post date: [November 26, 2012, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1984 "2012-11-26T19:57:15Z")
Even those of us who arrange and install shrubberies are in considerable economic duress during these dark times.
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### Author:  [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)
#### Post date: [November 26, 2012, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1985 "2012-11-26T21:09:27Z")
There must have been a Pentultimate Supper…
Regards,
Shodan
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 26, 2012, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1986 "2012-11-26T21:23:48Z")
I’ve come to give myself up.
What for?
Looting, pillaging and sacking a major city.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1987 "2012-11-27T05:04:20Z")
Bring out yer dead!
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 11:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1988 "2012-11-27T11:40:04Z")
I told you to lay off the beans, you whore!
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1989 "2012-11-27T15:12:12Z")
We was not snoggin’!
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1990 "2012-11-27T15:54:16Z")
You’re using coconuts!
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1991 "2012-11-27T17:21:33Z")
Hello. Tonight on ‘Face the Press’ we’re going to examine two different views of contemporary things. On my left is the Minister for Home Affairs who is wearing a striking organza dress in pink tulle, with matching pearls and a diamante collar necklace. The shoes are in brushed pigskin with gold clasps, by Maxwell of Bond Street. The hair is by Roger, and the whole ensemble is crowned by a spectacular display of Christmas orchids. And on my right - putting the case against the Government - is a small patch of brown liquid …which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing.Good evening. Minister, may I put the first question to you? In your plan, ‘A Better Britain For Us’, you claimed that you would build 88,000 million, billion houses a year in the Greater London area alone. In fact, you’ve built only three in the last fifteen years. Are you a bit disappointed with this result?
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1992 "2012-11-27T17:27:25Z")
Every time I try to talk to someone it’s “sorry this” and “forgive me that” and “I’m not worthy”…
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1993 "2012-11-27T19:33:47Z")
M’lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show m’lud, that m’lud - ah, not you m’lud, that m’lud, m’lud, while passing sentence at the Central Criminal Court blotted his copy book. Call exhibit Q.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1994 "2012-11-27T20:49:20Z")
Call the Church Police!
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 27, 2012, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1995 "2012-11-27T22:17:14Z")
Get your own arts programme, you fairy!
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### Author:  [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2012, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1996 "2012-11-28T03:54:38Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#):
>
> Call the Church Police!
The Church Police!
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2012, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1997 "2012-11-28T05:18:30Z")
Stop thinking about sex!
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2012, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1998 "2012-11-28T14:30:59Z")
Not ve–… It’s the single most popular cheese in the world!
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### Author:  [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)
#### Post date: [November 28, 2012, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/1999 "2012-11-28T21:23:29Z")
Suck the nipple, sir?
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 29, 2012, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2000 "2012-11-29T14:26:56Z")
Now you may think that this is very harsh behaviour, but let me tell you that our management consultants actually queried the necessity for us to employ a pantomime horse at all.
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