# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 138
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2013, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2741 "2013-09-05T14:12:13Z")
Mr. Vercotti, are you sure there isn’t a spade? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2013, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2742 "2013-09-05T14:14:31Z")
Hello again, and welcome to the show. Tonight we continue to look at some famous deaths. Tonight we start with the wonderful death of Genghis Khan, conqueror of India. Take it away Genghis. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2013, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2743 "2013-09-05T14:27:43Z")
Yes. Good. Nibbling the earlobe, uhh, kneading the buttocks, and so on and so forth. So, we have all these possibilities before we stampede towards the clitoris, Watson. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2744 "2013-09-09T19:54:45Z")
Ah - good evening everyone, and welcome to the second of our Italian language classes, in which we’ll be helping you brush up your Italian. Last week we started at the beginning, and we learnt the Italian for a ‘spoon’. Now, I wonder how many of you can remember what it was? ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2745 "2013-09-09T20:56:37Z")
I don’t know much about art but I know what I like! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2013, 12:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2746 "2013-09-11T12:02:08Z")
Yes, mothers, new improved Whizzo butter containing 10% more or less is absolutely indistinguishable from a dead crab. Remember, buy Whizzo butter and go to HEAVEN! ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2013, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2747 "2013-09-11T14:40:31Z")
It’s funny how one can go through life, as I have, disliking bananas and being indifferent to cheese, and then be able to eat, and enjoy, a banana and cheese sandwich like that. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2013, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2748 "2013-09-11T14:42:43Z")
He’s going to split a railway carriage with his nose. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [September 11, 2013, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2749 "2013-09-11T21:38:38Z")
Good evening. One of the main elements in any assessment of the medieval open field farming system is the availability of oxen for the winter plowing. Professor Tofts of the University of Manchester puts it like this: _To plough once in the Winter sowing and again in lent Sowing with as many oxen Sowing with as many oxen As he shall have yoked in the plough Oh yeah, oh yeah As he shall have yoked in the plough oh yeah yeah oh yeah oh yeah_ ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2750 "2013-09-12T03:08:15Z")
_Holy Grail_ gets a new trailer: [http://now.msn.com/monty-python-and-the-holy-grail-modern-trailer-goes-viral](http://now.msn.com/monty-python-and-the-holy-grail-modern-trailer-goes-viral) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 11:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2751 "2013-09-12T11:58:26Z")
Let us not go to Camelot. It is a silly place. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2752 "2013-09-12T13:11:26Z")
The only difficult bit for Ron is getting out of the Earth’s atmosphere. Er, once he’s in orbit he’ll be able to run straight to Mercury. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2753 "2013-09-12T13:50:39Z")
First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once at the number three, being the third number to be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2754 "2013-09-12T14:10:01Z")
I am now extremely hopeful that Ron will break the world record for remaining underground. He’s a wonderful boy for this, he’s got this really enormous talent, this really huge talent. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2755 "2013-09-12T14:43:27Z")
Don’t say that word! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2756 "2013-09-12T14:46:07Z")
Ni! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2757 "2013-09-12T15:32:10Z")
Splunge! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2758 "2013-09-12T15:35:18Z")
Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely Spam! Lovely Spam! ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [September 13, 2013, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2759 "2013-09-13T19:09:20Z")
Don’t call me señor! I’m not a Spanish person. You must call me Mr Biggles, or Group Captain Biggles or Mary Biggles if I’m dressed as my wife, but never señor! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2013, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2760 "2013-09-14T17:56:33Z")
You went to Ibiza last year. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=137) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=139)