# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 148
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2013, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2941 "2013-12-15T21:10:25Z")
Some Python swag you might like: [http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VP3862](http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VP3862) [http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VP3852](http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VP3852) [http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VP3842](http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VP3842) [http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VN1802T](http://www.thewirelesscatalog.com/cgi-bin/hazel.cgi?action=DETAIL&ITEM=VN1802T) ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2013, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2942 "2013-12-15T23:45:34Z")
Lord! I am affected by a bald patch. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2013, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2943 "2013-12-15T23:47:52Z")
Ni! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2013, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2944 "2013-12-16T04:12:24Z")
_Run away!_ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2945 "2013-12-30T14:33:01Z")
I’m not dead. ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2013, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2946 "2013-12-30T16:59:07Z")
Nothing, nothing, I just like the word, it gives me confidence. Gorn…gorn.It’s got a sort of woody quality about it. Gorn. Gorn. Much better than ‘newspaper’ or ‘litterbin’. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2014, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2947 "2014-01-01T16:24:53Z")
Good morning. I’m sorry to have kept you waiting, but I’m afraid my walk has become rather sillier recently, and so it takes me rather longer to get to work. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 1, 2014, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2948 "2014-01-01T18:44:58Z")
If I may begin at the beginning. First there is the Cherry Fondue. Now this is extremely nasty. (pause) But we can’t prosecute you for that. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2949 "2014-01-03T16:16:43Z")
I come about your advert - ‘Small white pussy cat for sale. Excellent condition’. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2950 "2014-01-03T16:58:57Z")
The cat just choked on a lupin! ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2951 "2014-01-03T17:17:13Z")
No, no, I meant terrible in the sense of unfortunate. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2952 "2014-01-03T17:19:28Z")
Will you stand UP, please? ---
**Author:** ![Tazmanian\_Devil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cc9497/32.png) [@Tazmanian\_Devil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tazmanian_Devil)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2953 "2014-01-03T17:37:19Z")
_After several seconds_ Mr Nesbitt has learnt the value of not being seen. However he has chosen a very obvious piece of cover. _Bush explodes, we hear a muffled scream_ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2954 "2014-01-03T18:13:18Z")
When the Piranhas left school they were called up but were found by an Army Board to be too unstable even for National Service. Denied the opportunity to use their talents in the service of their country, they began to operate what they called ‘The Operation’. They would select a victim and then threaten to beat him up if he paid the so-called protection money. Four months later they started another operation which the called ‘The Other Operation’. In this racket they selected another victim and threatened not to beat him up if he didn’t pay them. One month later they hit upon ‘The Other Other Operation’. In this the victim was threatened that if he didn’t pay them, they would beat him up. This for the Piranha brothers was the turning point. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2955 "2014-01-03T18:15:22Z")
Read to me a bit, dear wife, of Will Shakespeare’s _Gay Boys in Bondage_. ---
**Author:** ![randompattern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@randompattern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randompattern)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2014, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2956 "2014-01-03T18:17:37Z")
Dinsdale ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2014, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2957 "2014-01-07T18:32:38Z")
One on’t cross beams gone owt askew on treddle. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2014, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2958 "2014-01-07T19:29:13Z")
Geoffrey was a mounted policeman - with a difference. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2014, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2959 "2014-01-07T23:49:54Z")
Listen, lad. I built this kingdom up from nothing. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2014, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/2960 "2014-01-07T23:59:29Z")
Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise…surprise and fear…fear and surprise… our two weapons are fear and surprise…and ruthless efficiency… Our three weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency…and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope… Our four…no… amongst our weapons… amongst our weaponry…are such elements as fear, surprise… I’ll come in again. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=147) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=149)