# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 178
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2014, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3541 "2014-05-09T01:56:06Z")
_Knight_: Perhaps he was dictating. _King Arthur_: Oh, shut up. ---
**Author:** ![Tazmanian\_Devil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cc9497/32.png) [@Tazmanian\_Devil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tazmanian_Devil)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2014, 2:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3542 "2014-05-09T02:41:32Z")
> [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](#): > > Wait. Don’t tell me - it’s something to do with moonlight - it goes with her eyes - it’s soft and gentle, warm and yielding, deeply lyrical and yet tender and frightened like a tiny white rabbit. It’s Deirdre. ---
**Author:** ![Tazmanian\_Devil](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cc9497/32.png) [@Tazmanian\_Devil](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tazmanian_Devil)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2014, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3543 "2014-05-09T02:44:06Z")
> [@CheshireKat](#): > > He’s not dead! He’s resting. > ps tried to read all 70 pages…I’m cross-eyed…anyway, this one’s worth repeating 😃 All right then, if he’s resting, I’ll wake him up! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2014, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3544 "2014-05-09T14:53:55Z")
You get a nude lady with fully comprehensive motor insurance. If you just want third party then she has to keep her bra on, ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3545 "2014-05-10T00:31:49Z")
Oh, wicked, bad, naughty, evil Zoot! Oh, she is a naughty person, and she must pay the penalty – and here in Castle Anthrax, we have but one punishment for setting alight the grail-shaped beacon. You must tie her down on a bed…and spank her! And after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like. And then…spank me. Yes, yes, you must give us all a good spanking. And after the spanking, the oral sex! ---
**Author:** ![randompattern](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7993a0/32.png) [@randompattern](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/randompattern)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3546 "2014-05-10T01:35:23Z")
I’m a Red Sea pedestrian! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2014, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3547 "2014-05-10T04:26:41Z")
Kipling Road was a typical sort of East End street; people were in and out of each other’s houses with each other’s property all day. They were a cheery lot. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2014, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3548 "2014-05-11T23:09:02Z")
…and there was much rejoicing. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2014, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3549 "2014-05-12T17:26:23Z")
Well one day I was sitting at home threatening the kids, and I looked out of the hole in the wall and sees this tank drive up and one of Dinsdale’s boys gets out and he comes up, all nice and friendly like, and says Dinsdale wants to have a talk with me. So he chains me to the back of the tank and takes me for a scrape round to Dinsdale’s. And Dinsdale’s there in the conversation pit with Doug and Charles Paisley, the baby crusher, and a couple of film producers and a man they called ‘Kierkegaard’, who just sat there biting the heads of whippets and Dinsdale sayd ‘I hear you’ve been a naughty boy Clement’ and he splits me nostrils open and saws me leg off and pulls me liver out, and I said my name’s not Clement and then he loses his temper and nails my head to the floor. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2014, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3550 "2014-05-12T18:19:09Z")
Luxury. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2014, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3551 "2014-05-12T19:19:30Z")
“Do you have any?” he asked, expecting the answer, “No.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2014, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3552 "2014-05-12T20:31:41Z")
Ordinarily, yes, sir. Today the van broke down. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3553 "2014-05-13T16:50:38Z")
It’s from the BBC. They want to know if I want to be in a sketch on telly. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3554 "2014-05-13T18:06:00Z")
In fact, our Accounting Department told us we really didn’t need a pantomime horse at all. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3555 "2014-05-13T18:09:36Z")
Crucifixion? Good. Out of the door, line on the left, one cross each. Next. Crucifixion? Good. Out of the door, line on the left, one cross each. Next. Crucifixion? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3556 "2014-05-13T19:15:50Z")
Oh, so you’re Italian, then? ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2014, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3557 "2014-05-13T20:20:34Z")
The only people we hate more than the Romans are the fucking Judean People’s Front. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3558 "2014-05-14T04:23:58Z")
Gimme the 'oop! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3559 "2014-05-14T14:16:34Z")
The same drawing room. One lobotomy later ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2014, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3560 "2014-05-14T15:20:08Z")
Is your name not Bruce, then? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=177) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=179)