# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 186
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2014, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3701 "2014-07-19T20:18:01Z")
You must tie her down on a bed and spank her. You must spank her well. And after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like. And then, spank me. Yes, yes, you must give us all a good spanking. And after the spanking… the oral sex! ---
**Author:** ![K364](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k364/32/5_2.png) [@K364](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K364)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2014, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3702 "2014-07-19T22:36:31Z")
And now for something completely different … a man with three buttocks… We’ve done that! Oh all right. All right! A man with nine legs. He ran away. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2014, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3703 "2014-07-19T23:14:52Z")
Well that’s settled then…everyone’s gonna eat me! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2014, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3704 "2014-07-19T23:52:56Z")
Look! It’s Bicycle Repairman! But how? ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2014, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3705 "2014-07-20T16:33:39Z")
I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3706 "2014-07-21T14:22:57Z")
He hasn’t got shit all over 'im. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3707 "2014-07-21T14:47:27Z")
Fine, fine. Well, um… adopt, adapt and improve. Just a pair of knickers then please. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3708 "2014-07-21T15:37:31Z")
Dead Indian! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3709 "2014-07-21T16:13:56Z")
There’s another dead bishop on the landing, Dad. ---
**Author:** ![Srsly\_Dad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@Srsly\_Dad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Srsly_Dad)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2014, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3710 "2014-07-21T17:12:48Z")
Now, you listen here! He’s not the Messiah. He’s a very naughty boy! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3711 "2014-07-22T03:58:24Z")
I don’t care how many times its been used Oh, intercourse the penguin. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2014, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3712 "2014-07-22T23:11:46Z")
Is your wife interested in…photography? Snap, snap, grin, grin, wink, wink, nudge, nudge, say n’more? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3713 "2014-07-23T02:21:07Z")
Are you selling something? ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3714 "2014-07-23T02:55:23Z")
Yes, shrubberies are my trade. I am a shrubber. My name is Roger the Shrubber. I arrange, design, and sell shrubberies. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3715 "2014-07-23T14:03:40Z")
**Election official** Malcolm Peter Brian Telescope Adrian Umbrella Stand Jasper Wednesday _(pops mouth twice)_ Stoatgobbler John Raw Vegetable _(sound effect of horse whinnying)_ Arthur Norman Michael _(blows squeaker)_ Featherstone Smith _(blows whistle)_ Northgot Edwards Harris _(fires pistol, then ‘whoop’)_ Mason _(chuff-chuff-chuff-chuff)_ Frampton Jones Fruitbat _(laughs)_ _(squeaker)_ Gilbert _(sings)_ ‘We’ll keep a welcome in the’ _(three shots, stops singing)_ Williams If I Could Walk That Way Jenkin _(squeaker)_ Tiger-drawers Pratt Thompson _(sings)_ ‘Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head’ Darcy Carter _(horn)_ Pussycat _(sings)_ ‘Don’t Sleep In The Subway’ Barton Mainwaring _(hoot, ‘whoop’)_ Smith… **Announcer (V.O.)** Very Silly Party. **Election official** Two. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3716 "2014-07-23T14:13:34Z")
No. 1. The Larch. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3717 "2014-07-23T14:17:09Z")
Me heap dizzy. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3718 "2014-07-23T14:46:03Z")
Ou sont les voyageurs? Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Srsly\_Dad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/53a042/32.png) [@Srsly\_Dad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Srsly_Dad)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3719 "2014-07-23T18:02:14Z")
Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! … Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2014, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/3720 "2014-07-23T23:45:11Z")
I’m not dead! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=185) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=187)