# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 235
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2015, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4681 "2015-11-25T16:15:49Z")
Good evening and welcome, ladies and gentlemen. At this time we’d like to up the tempo a little, change the mood. We’ve got a number requested by Pip, Pauline, Nigel, Tarquin, and old Spotty - Tarquin’s mother - a little number specially written for the pubescence of ex-King Zog of Albania, and it’s entitled “Art Gallery.” Hope you like it. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2015, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4682 "2015-11-27T00:36:33Z")
You were lucky. We lived for three months in a brown paper bag in a septic tank. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2015, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4683 "2015-11-27T06:22:50Z")
Yeah, it’s hidden in his trousers! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2015, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4684 "2015-11-28T22:43:23Z")
Somebody. In this room. Must the murderer be. The murderer of the body is somebody in this room, which nobody must leave… leave the body in the room not to be left by anybody. Nobody leaves anybody or the body with somebody. Everybody who is anybody shall leave the body in the room body. Take the tablets Tiger. Anybody (as he searches for the tablets) with a body but not the body is nobody. Nobody leaves the body in the … (he takes the tablet) Albody me introbody albodyduce. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2015, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4685 "2015-11-29T01:45:09Z")
Luxury! ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2015, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4686 "2015-12-01T15:45:30Z")
“Ethel the Aardvark goes Quantity Surveying.” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 12:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4687 "2015-12-02T00:03:59Z")
Always look on the bright side of life. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4688 "2015-12-02T06:17:31Z")
Still, there’s one thing about being a hermit: at least you meet people. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4689 "2015-12-02T06:35:08Z")
Nuuuuuuuuuu! ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4690 "2015-12-02T13:55:31Z")
And when we got home, our dad would slice us in two with a bread knife. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4691 "2015-12-02T15:36:09Z")
Listen. If you really wanted to join the P.F.J., you’d have to really hate the Romans. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2015, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4692 "2015-12-02T17:47:00Z")
A _lot_. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2015, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4693 "2015-12-03T04:50:58Z")
Well, don’t think of them. Just count four in your head. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2015, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4694 "2015-12-03T15:08:55Z")
And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2015, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4695 "2015-12-03T15:31:58Z")
Yeah, I’ll have six bottles of Château Latour Forty-five… ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2015, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4696 "2015-12-04T22:21:11Z")
Oh, intercourse the penguin. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2015, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4697 "2015-12-05T04:43:14Z")
Venezuelan beaver cheese? ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2015, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4698 "2015-12-05T06:20:13Z")
I’m a lumberjack and I’m ok… ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4699 "2015-12-06T20:13:46Z")
Dad… it’s the man from ‘The Hay Wain’ by Constable to see you. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2015, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4700 "2015-12-06T20:43:49Z")
Taking life as it comes, sharing the good things and the bad things, finding laughter and fun wherever they go - it is with these two happy-go-lucky rogues that our story begins. For it is they who were run over by Alex Diamond … international crime fighter … and playboy … fast-moving … tough-talking … and just one of the many hundreds of famous people who suffer from lumbago, the epidemic disease about which no one knows more than this man … Dr Emile Koning … doctor … surgeon … proctologist … and selfless fighter against human suffering, whose doorbell was the one above the hero of our story tonight Rear-Admiral Humphrey De Vere! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=234) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=236)