# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 244
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4861 "2016-02-17T17:29:34Z")
How do you know so much about swallows? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4862 "2016-02-17T17:31:13Z")
African swallows are non-migratory. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4863 "2016-02-17T17:55:42Z")
You were lucky to have a lake! There were a hundred and sixty of us living in a small shoebox in the middle of the road. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4864 "2016-02-17T17:56:42Z")
No, no. Look. This shed business, it doesn’t really matter at all, the sheds aren’t important. It’s just a few friends call me Two Sheds and that’s all there is to it. I wish you’d ask me about my music. I’m a composer. People always ask me about the sheds, they’ve got it out of proportion, I’m fed up with the shed, I wish I’d never got it in the first place. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4865 "2016-02-17T19:41:51Z")
Mr. and Mrs. Watson of ‘Ivy Cottage’, Worplesdon Road, Hull, chose a very cunning way of not being seen. When we called at their house, we found that they had gone away on two weeks holiday. They had not left any forwading address, and they had bolted and barred the house to prevent us getting in. However a neighbour told us where there were. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4866 "2016-02-17T20:19:22Z")
I didn’t know you were called Dennis. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4867 "2016-02-17T20:38:02Z")
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o’clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed, drink a cup of sulphuric acid, work twenty-nine hours a day down mill, and pay mill owner for permission to come to work, and when we got home, our Dad and our mother would kill us, and dance about on our graves singing ‘Hallelujah.’ ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4868 "2016-02-17T21:23:34Z")
Malcolm Peter Brian Telescope Adrian Umbrella Stand Jasper Wednesday (pops mouth twice) Stoatgobbler John Raw Vegetable (sound effect of horse whinnying) Arthur Norman Michael (blows squeaker) Featherstone Smith (blows whistle) Northgot Edwards Harris (fires pistol, which goes ‘whoop’) Mason (chuff-chuff-chuff) Frampton Jones Fruitbat Gilbert (sings) ‘We’ll keep a welcome in the’ (three shots, stops singing) Williams If I Could Walk That Way Jenkin (squeaker) Tiger-draws Pratt Thompson (sings) ‘Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head’ Darcy Carter (horn) Pussycat ‘Don’t Sleep In The Subway’ Barton Mannering (hoot, ‘whoop’) Smith. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2016, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4869 "2016-02-17T22:48:13Z")
Why is it that the world never remembered the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nürnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- shönedanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm? ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4870 "2016-02-18T01:19:25Z")
Yes. Nudge nudge. Snap snap. Grin grin, wink wink, say no more? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4871 "2016-02-18T02:40:36Z")
[Roll end credits.] ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4872 "2016-02-18T11:43:39Z")
No, no, no - it’s spelt Raymond Luxury Yach-t, but it’s pronounced ‘Throatwobbler Mangrove’. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4873 "2016-02-18T16:09:50Z")
A spanking! A spanking! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4874 "2016-02-18T17:51:19Z")
It’s the Bishop! ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2016, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4875 "2016-02-18T19:43:39Z")
Call the Church Police! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 12:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4876 "2016-02-20T00:34:52Z")
And now, the sound of John Denver being strangled. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4877 "2016-02-20T01:28:59Z")
As for me, huh, if you want to know what I think, I’ll show you something. Come with me. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 12:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4878 "2016-02-20T12:36:29Z")
Llamas are larger than frogs. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4879 "2016-02-20T13:23:30Z")
Well, it’s five past nine and nearly time for six past nine. On BBC 2 now it’ll shortly be six and a half minutes past nine. Later on this evening it’ll be ten o’clock and at 10.30 we’ll be joining BBC 2 in time for 10.33, and don’t forget tomorrow when it’ll be 9.20. Those of you who missed 8.45 on Friday will be able to see it again this Friday at a quarter to nine. Now here is a time check. It’s six and a half minutes to the big green thing. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4880 "2016-02-20T16:11:04Z")
You came on my pil-low…Aaarrrrrgggggggghhhhhhhhhhh! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=243) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=245)