# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 245
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2016, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4881 "2016-02-20T18:35:36Z")
What I was thinking was, I was going to ask him if he could make me a bit lame in one leg during the middle of the week. You know, something beggable, but not leprosy, which is a pain in the arse, to be blunt. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 3:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4882 "2016-02-23T03:28:35Z")
Still, what is washing when we are on the verge of a great scientific breakthrough? ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 11:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4883 "2016-02-23T11:44:27Z")
I don’t know. I just don’t know. I really just don’t know. I’m afraid I really just don’t know. I’m afraid even I really just don’t know. I have to tell you I’m afraid even I really just don’t know. I’m afraid I have to tell you… ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4884 "2016-02-23T13:30:24Z")
I come about your advert - ‘Small white pussy cat for sale. Excellent condition’. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4885 "2016-02-23T13:41:35Z")
Lemming Lemming Lemming of the BDA Lemming Lemming Lemming of the BD - Lemming of the BD - Lemming of the BD, BDAaaaaaa. It’s a man’s life in the British Dental Association! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4886 "2016-02-23T15:20:50Z")
Highlights of that broadcast will be discussed later by Lord George-Brown, ex-Foreign Secretary, Mr Sven Olafson, the ex-Norwegian Minister of Finance, Sir Charles Ollendorff, ex-Chairman of the Norwegian Trades Council, Mr Hamish McLavell, the Mayor of Wick, the nearest large town to Norway, Mrs Betty Norday, whose name sounds remarkably like Norway, Mr Brian Waynor, whose name is an anagram of Norway, Mr and Mrs Ford, whose name sounds like Fiord, of which there are a lot in Norway. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4887 "2016-02-23T15:26:27Z")
And Saint Atila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, “Oh, Lord, bless this thy hand grenade, that with it thou mayest blow thy enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2016, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4888 "2016-02-23T18:30:02Z")
The text, vic! Don’t say the text! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2016, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4889 "2016-02-24T16:43:09Z")
What they want is filth: people doing things to each other with chainsaws during Tupperware parties, babysitters being stabbed with knitting needles by gay presidential candidates, vigilante groups strangling chickens, armed bands of theater critics exterminating mutant goats. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2016, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4890 "2016-02-24T16:53:01Z")
Well, we haven’t got any lupins. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2016, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4891 "2016-02-24T18:16:39Z")
Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, Galloping through the sward, Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, And his horse Concorde. He steals from the rich and Gives to the poor. Mr Moore, Mr Moore, Mr Moore. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4892 "2016-02-25T01:18:19Z")
When danger reared its ugly head He bravely turned his tail and fled Yes, Brave Sir Robin turned about And gallantly he chickened out Bravely taking to his feet He beat a very brave retreat Bravest of the brave Sir Robin Petrified of being dead Soiled his pants then brave Sir Robin Turned away and fled ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4893 "2016-02-25T12:27:03Z")
I cut down trees, I skip and jump I like to press wild flowers. I put on women’s clothing and hang around in bars. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 12:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4894 "2016-02-25T12:31:51Z")
Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, Dum dum dum the night. Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore, Dum de dum dum plight. He steals dum dum dum And dum dum dum dee Dennis dum, Dennis dee, dum dum dum. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 3:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4895 "2016-02-25T15:31:39Z")
Well, on second thought, let’s not go to Camelot: it is a silly place. Right. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4896 "2016-02-25T15:42:19Z")
I’m sorry, is this a 5 minute argument or the full half hour? ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4897 "2016-02-25T16:45:08Z")
I like traffic lights, I like traffic lights, I like traffic lights, Although my name’s not Bamber. I like traffic lights, I like traffic lights, I like traffic lights, I…Oh God! ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4898 "2016-02-25T17:19:20Z")
There is only one thing worse than playing squash together, and that is playing it by yourself. _(silence)_ I wish I hadn’t said that. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4899 "2016-02-25T18:54:04Z")
And he’s down again, and I don’t think he’s going to get up this time. [referee counts him out] No, Jack Bodel has defeated Sir Kenneth Clark in the very first round here tonight and so this big Lincolnshire heavyweight becomes the new Oxford Professor of Fine Art. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2016, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/4900 "2016-02-25T19:29:41Z")
Simon’s there and he’s putting the boot in, and not terribly hard, but he’s going down and Simon can move on. Now Vivian’s there. Vivian is there and waiting for a chance. Here he comes, oh a piledriver, a real piledriver, and now Simon’s on No. l, Vivian 2, Nigel 3, Gervaise on 4 and Oliver bringing up the rear. Ah there’s Oliver _(Oliver is still trying to jump the matchboxes)_, there’s Oliver now, he’s at the back. I think he’s having a little trouble with his old brain injury, he’s going to have a go, no, no, bad luck, he’s up, he doesn’t know when he’s beaten, this boy, he doesn’t know when he’s winning either. He doesn’t have any sort of sensory apparatus. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=244) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=246)