# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 274
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2016, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5461 "2016-08-20T02:38:36Z")
Mr Neutron! The most dangerous and terrifying man in the world! The man with the strength of an army! The wisdom of all the scholars in history! The man who had the power to destroy the world. Mr Neutron. No one knows what strange and distant planet he came from, or where he was going to!.. Wherever he went, terror and destruction were sure to follow. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2016, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5462 "2016-08-20T03:34:42Z")
Hello, good evening and welcome to another edition of Blood, Devastation, Death, War and Horror, and later on we’ll be meeting a man who does gardening. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2016, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5463 "2016-08-20T04:05:35Z")
Watery tarts lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2016, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5464 "2016-08-20T06:01:15Z")
It’s spelt Raymond Luxury-Yacht but it’s pronounced Throat-Wobbler Mangrove! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2016, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5465 "2016-08-21T02:52:32Z")
Why is it that nobody remembers the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle- dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz- ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer- spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein- nurnburger-bratwustle-gernspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut- gumberaber-shonedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft… of Ulm? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2016, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5466 "2016-08-21T04:24:54Z")
Oh, I thought you were complaining about the bouzouki player. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2016, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5467 "2016-08-21T08:13:42Z")
So, let’s just stop gabbing on about it. It’s completely pointless and it’s getting us nowhere! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2016, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5468 "2016-08-21T15:15:04Z")
All things dull and ugly, All creatures short and squat, All things rude and nasty, The Lord God made the lot. Each little snake that poisons, Each little wasp that stings, He made their brutish venom He made their horrid wings. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 1:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5469 "2016-08-22T01:07:51Z")
I mean a lot of others say they unclog you, but I never had a single bowel movement with the ‘Recto-Puffs’. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5470 "2016-08-22T02:35:21Z")
We have a lot of trouble with these oldies. Pension day’s the worst - they go mad. As soon as they get their hands on their money they blow it all on milk, bread, tea, tin of meat for the cat. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 7:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5471 "2016-08-22T07:42:33Z")
Don’t stand there gawping like you’ve never seen the Hand of God before! Now, today, we’re going to do marching up and down the square! That is, unless any of you got anything better to do. Well?! Anyone got anything they’d rather be doing than marching up and down the square?! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5472 "2016-08-22T09:31:47Z")
I would tax Raquel Welch. I have a feeling she’d tax me. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 10:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5473 "2016-08-22T10:28:48Z")
. . . and their lovely daughter Mitzi Gaynor, who had fabulous tits and an enchanting smile, and wooden teeth which she had bought at a chemist’s in Augsburgh, despite the fire risk. She treasured these teeth, which were made of the finest pine, and she varnished them after every meal. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 12:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5474 "2016-08-22T12:53:31Z")
And what is the name of your ravishing wife? Wait, don’t tell me - it’s something to do with moonlight - it goes with her eyes - it’s soft and gentle, warm and yielding, deeply lyrical and yet tender and frightened like a tiny white rabbit. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5475 "2016-08-22T12:58:37Z")
This is supposed to be a happy occasion! Let’s not bicker and argue about who killed who. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5476 "2016-08-22T13:34:10Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > We have a lot of trouble with these oldies. Pension day’s the worst - they go mad. As soon as they get their hands on their money they blow it all on milk, bread, tea, tin of meat for the cat. See 11 posts earlier. All things sick and cancerous, All evil great and small, All things foul and dangerous, The Lord God made them all. ---
**Author:** ![Knorf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/58956e/32.png) [@Knorf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knorf)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5477 "2016-08-22T15:50:12Z")
It could be carried by an African swallow! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5478 "2016-08-22T17:06:05Z")
Look! Two people . . . three people have just fallen past that window. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5479 "2016-08-22T20:36:21Z")
She’s got a big bottom. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2016, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5480 "2016-08-22T20:57:14Z")
You see, your cat is suffering from what we Vets haven’t found a word for. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=273) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=275)