# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 295
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 4:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5881 "2016-12-13T04:19:10Z")
Yes, I’ve got a hat. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5882 "2016-12-13T05:04:40Z")
What? Ridden on a horse? You’re using coconuts! ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 7:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5883 "2016-12-13T07:23:03Z")
And could we have the next contender, please?..Ha ha ha… Good evening, madam, and your name is? Yes, yes. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 9:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5884 "2016-12-13T09:07:49Z")
It’s Being-hit-on-the-head lessons in here. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5885 "2016-12-13T15:13:00Z")
Right. Now write it a hundred times before sunup, or I’ll cut your balls off. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5886 "2016-12-13T23:11:28Z")
Oh, oh oh I’m sorry, this is "abuse’. You want Room 12-A just along the corridor. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 13, 2016, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5887 "2016-12-13T23:51:37Z")
No parrots were involved in an accident on the M-1 today when a Lorry carrying High-octane fuel was in collison with a bollard. That’s a BOLLARD and _NOT_ a PARROT. A spokesman for parrots said he was glad no parrots were involved. The Minister of Technology (photo of minister with parrot on his shoulder) today met the three Russian leaders (cut to photograph of 3 Russian men in a group and each with a parrot on his shoulder) to discuss a 4 million pound airliner deal…None of them went in the cage, or swung on the little wooden trapeze, or ate any of the nice millet seed. Yum, _Yum_. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2016, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5888 "2016-12-14T04:13:05Z")
You lucky bastard! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2016, 11:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5889 "2016-12-14T11:22:58Z")
Dinsdale? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2016, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5890 "2016-12-14T15:38:39Z")
I’m taking this lot in in the name of Her Gracious Majesty Queen Elizabeth. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5891 "2016-12-15T03:12:35Z")
That’s right, yes, you go left at artificial limbs and hearing aids, right at dentures and it’s on your left just by glass eyes. It doesn’t say toupees to avoid embarrassing people, but you can _SMELL’EM_. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5892 "2016-12-15T03:23:36Z")
Thank you Onan! And now: a letter, a hotel registration book, and a series of photographs, which could add up to divorce, premature retirement, and possible criminal proceedings for a company director in Bromsgrove. He’s a freemason, and a conservative M.P., so Mr S. that’s 3,000 pounds please to stop us from revealing: Your name, the name of the three other people involved, the youth organization to which they belonged, and the shop where you bought the equipment. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5893 "2016-12-15T15:25:41Z")
Good evening You may think it strange that we should be asking you to vote Norwegian at the next election but consider the advantages. In Norway, we have one of the highest per cappa income rates in Europe; we have an industrial re-investment rate of 14%. And girls with massive knockers! Honestly, they’ll do anything for you; they’ll go through the card - you name it, they know it! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5894 "2016-12-15T15:27:36Z")
Mr Larch, you heard the case for the prosecution. Is there anything you wish to say before I pass sentence? ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5895 "2016-12-15T16:33:08Z")
Hostile! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5896 "2016-12-15T17:48:45Z")
But Kids were different in them days. They didn’t have their heads filled with all this Cartesian Dualism! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 15, 2016, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5897 "2016-12-15T19:23:54Z")
(singing) If I were not in the CID Something else I’d like to be If I were not in the CID A window cleaner, me! With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub And a rub-a-dub all day long With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub I’d sing this merry song! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2016, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5898 "2016-12-16T02:42:38Z")
Top-hole. Bally Jerry, pranged his kite right in the how’s your father. Hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper’s and caught his can in the Bertie. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2016, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5899 "2016-12-16T04:53:03Z")
The battle raged long and hard, but as night fell Sidney overcame the Spaniards. 6,000 copies of _Tits and Bums_ and 4,000 copies of _Shower Sheila_ were seized that day. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2016, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/5900 "2016-12-16T05:29:11Z")
Oh mother don’t be so sentimental. Things explode everyday. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=294) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=296)