# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 307
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2017, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6121 "2017-02-09T09:50:31Z")
Good evening, last week we learned how to saw a lady in half. This week we’re going to learn how to saw a lady into three bits and dispose of the body… ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2017, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6122 "2017-02-09T14:42:32Z")
No, not really, no she’s been going very well in training, and at Doncaster last week, and I fancy her very strongly for the Cheltenham weekend. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2017, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6123 "2017-02-09T15:34:08Z")
They’re a couple of little bastards. I hate 'em. They’ve got eyes like little pigs, just like their mother. She’s a disaster… a really horrible-looking person, she is. I thought that one would stay on the shelf, but along comes this stupid dentist git. He’s a real creepy little bastard, he is. I hate 'im. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2017, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6124 "2017-02-09T22:17:22Z")
Well, that’s about it for tonight, ladies and gentlemen, but remember if you’ve enjoyed watching the show just half as much as we’ve enjoyed doing it, then we’ve enjoyed it twice as much as you. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2017, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6125 "2017-02-10T05:14:42Z")
If you don’t care for your scalp, you get rabies. Then there’s Kenneth, he’s our youngest. Mind you, he’s a bit of a problem… at least my husband thinks he is, anyway. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2017, 10:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6126 "2017-02-10T10:37:13Z")
Well, absolutely, and what makes it worse, sometimes at the end of a sentence I’ll come out with the wrong fusebox. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2017, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6127 "2017-02-10T15:46:28Z")
Mr. Neutron: This is a nice area. Mr. Entrail: It’s like a bloody graveyard. I hate it. Mr. Neutron: It’s handy for the shops and convenient for the West End. Mr. Entrail: If you like going to the West End. I think it’s a stinking dump. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2017, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6128 "2017-02-10T22:49:31Z")
Do you want to come upstairs?..Oh! Or have you come to arrange a holiday? ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2017, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6129 "2017-02-11T03:04:49Z")
Now, many of the medical profession are sceptical about my work. They point to my record of treatment of athlete’s foot sufferers - eighty-four dead, sixty-five severely wounded and twelve missing believed cured. But then, people laughed at Bob Hope, they laughed at my wife when she wrapped herself up in greaseproof paper and hopped into the Social Security office, but that doesn’t mean that Pasteur was wrong! Look, I’ll show you what I mean. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2017, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6130 "2017-02-11T05:10:57Z")
Mrs. Ottershaw never used to bother… then of course she was very old… she was 206! Well, must be going… if you need any help I’ll send Frank round. He could do with a bit of exercise, ha! ha! ha! ha!.. Fat old bastard. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2017, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6131 "2017-02-12T05:06:04Z")
He doesn’t give me any confidence at all - he’s obviously a dummy. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2017, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6132 "2017-02-12T05:48:15Z")
Oh, yes, sir. We’ve bombed a lot of places flat, sir. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2017, 10:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6133 "2017-02-12T10:58:36Z")
Cyril Connolly? No, semi-carnally. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2017, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6134 "2017-02-12T15:14:46Z")
Yes, please Mr Roosevelt, but try and keep the noise to a minimum. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2017, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6135 "2017-02-12T18:30:39Z")
Look my lad, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I’m looking at one right now. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2017, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6136 "2017-02-12T19:05:28Z")
He’s the most brilliant man I ever met. We were in the CIA together. He’s retired now. He breeds rabbits up in the Yukon. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2017, 9:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6137 "2017-02-13T09:08:26Z")
It’s _Tess of the d’Urbervilles_ all over again. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2017, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6138 "2017-02-13T15:20:52Z")
Er… no… I’m… er… I’m… I’m from the ballet. The U.S. Government Ballet. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2017, 4:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6139 "2017-02-13T16:40:18Z")
Excuse me. Are you the Judean People’s Front? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2017, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/6140 "2017-02-13T20:07:13Z")
Oh, we had a marvelous time. It was Margot Fonteyn dancing _Les Sylphides_… oh, it was so beautiful… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=306) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=308)