# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 358
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2018, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7141 "2018-02-12T16:21:08Z")
Father: And when do you expect to get married? Shabby: Oh, right away, sport, right away. You know, I haven’t had it for weeks! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2018, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7142 "2018-02-12T16:58:19Z")
She’s beautiful, she’s rich, she’s got huuuuge…tracts of land… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2018, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7143 "2018-02-13T15:59:07Z")
Shabby: I clean out public lavatories. Father: Is there promotion involved? Shabby: Oh yeah, yeah. (produces handkerchief and clears throat horribly into it) After five years they give me a brush. I’m sorry, squire, I’ve gobbed on your carpet. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2018, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7144 "2018-02-13T16:20:37Z")
Yes, you know, we find that nine out of ten British housewives can’t tell the difference between Whizzo butter and a dead crab. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2018, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7145 "2018-02-13T16:48:57Z")
You have green, scaly skin with a soft yellow underbelly with a series of fin-like ridges running down your spine and tail. Although lizardlike in shape, you can grow anything up to thirty feet in length, with huge teeth that can bite off great rocks and trees. You inhabit arid and sub-tropical zones and wear spectacles. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2018, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7146 "2018-02-13T17:59:17Z")
You have to play him all, you know, shaky legs and pratfalls and the dentures coming out. And then there’s that heart-rending scene where he goes right off his nut - beee bid dee deee - which can take out of you, what with having the crown to keep on. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2018, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7147 "2018-02-13T18:16:05Z")
The low slim-line has been cut off-the-shoulder to heighten the effect of the Minister’s fine bone structure. Well, I think the Minister is coming to the end of his answer now, so let’s go back over and join the discussion. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2018, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7148 "2018-02-14T15:22:38Z")
You probably noticed that I didn’t say ‘and now for something completely different’ just now. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 14, 2018, 4:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7149 "2018-02-14T16:02:01Z")
It’s… ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2018, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7150 "2018-02-15T14:57:01Z")
…a sign that we must gather shoes together in abundance. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2018, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7151 "2018-02-15T16:26:13Z")
Tonight on _The Money Programme_, we’re going to look at money. Lots of it. On film, and in the studio. Some of it in nice piles, others in lovely clanky bits of loose change, some of it neatly counted into fat little hundreds, delicate fivers stuffed into bulging wallets, nice crisp clean cheques, pert pieces of copper coinage thrust deep into trouser pockets, romantic foreign money rolling against the thigh with rough familiarity, beautiful wayward curlicued banknotes, filigree copperplating cheek by jowl with tumbling hexagonal milled edges, rubbing gently against the terse leather of beautifully-balanced bank books… ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [February 15, 2018, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7152 "2018-02-15T19:30:05Z")
Spare a talent for an old ex-leper? ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 16, 2018, 4:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7153 "2018-02-16T16:26:54Z")
That’s you, m’lud, not _you_, m’lud. ---
**Author:** ![K364](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k364/32/5_2.png) [@K364](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/K364)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 1:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7154 "2018-02-17T01:19:21Z")
Tough titty if it did, ya nasty spotted prancer. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7155 "2018-02-17T03:41:56Z")
It’s perfectly ordinary banter, Squiffy. Bally Jerry…pranged his kite right in the how’s yer father…hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper’s and caught his can in the Bertie. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2018, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7156 "2018-02-17T20:59:19Z")
It is the rabbit! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7157 "2018-02-18T15:32:21Z")
Well don’t worry about that. But please do sit down. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2018, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7158 "2018-02-18T18:45:23Z")
You’re no fun anymore! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 4:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7159 "2018-02-20T16:24:04Z")
Well, they’ve had very bad luck on the tour so far. They missed four very easy kicks against the Exeter Amateur Operatic Society, which must have cost them the match and then of course there was that crippling defeat at the hands of the Derry and Toms Soft Toy Department, so I don’t think they can be really fancying their chances against the London Pooves on Saturday. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2018, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7160 "2018-02-20T17:13:30Z")
I want you to be my helpmate. As Tarzan had his Jane, as Napoleon had his Josephine, as Frankie Laine had whoever he had, I want you to help me in my plan to dominate the world! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=357) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=359)