# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 362
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2018, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7221 "2018-04-13T20:52:53Z")
It’s our cat. He doesn’t do anything. He just sits out there on the lawn. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 13, 2018, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7222 "2018-04-13T22:37:55Z")
Splunge! ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2018, 10:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7223 "2018-04-15T22:45:54Z")
Ooh … why does anyone want to be a private dick? Fame, money, glamour, excitement, sex! ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2018, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7224 "2018-04-15T22:49:17Z")
I’m raising polecats for peace. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7225 "2018-04-16T04:50:12Z")
There seems to be no end to McTeagle’s poetic invention. ‘My new cheque book hasn’t arrived’ was followed up by the brilliantly allegorical ‘What’s twenty quid to the bloody Midland Bank?’ and more recently his prizewinning poem to the Arts Council: ‘Can you lend me a thousand quid?’ ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7226 "2018-04-16T13:31:45Z")
Thank you. I didn’t want to seem a bit of an old fusspot just now you know, but it’s just as easy to get these things right as they are easily found in the BALPA handbook. Oh, one other thing, in the Sherlock Holmes last week Tommy Cooper told a joke about a charter flight, omitting to point out that one must be a member of any organization that charters a plane for at least six months beforehand, before being able to take advantage of it. Did rather spoil the joke for me, I’m afraid. (phone ring) Yes, ah yes - yes. (puts phone down) My wife just reminded me that on a recent ‘High Chapparal’ Kathy Kirby was singing glibly about ‘Fly me to the Stars’ when of course there are no scheduled flights of this kind, or even chartered, available to the general public at the present moment, although of course, when they are BALPA will be in the vanguard. Or the Trident. Little joke for the chaps up at BALPA House. And one other small point. Why is it that these new lurex dancing tights go baggy at the knees after only a couple of evenings’ fun? Bring back the old canvas ones I say. It is incredible, isn’t it, that in these days when man can walk on the moon and work out the most complicated hire purchase agreements, I still get these terrible headaches. Well . … I seem to have wandered a bit, but still, no harm done. Jolly good luck. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2018, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7227 "2018-04-16T13:32:41Z")
No. 1. The Larch. The… Larch. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7228 "2018-04-17T12:47:17Z")
My brain hurts. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7229 "2018-04-17T14:36:56Z")
We are here today to witness the opening of a new box to replace the box which used to stand at the corner of Ulverston Road and Sandwood Crescent. Owing to the road-widening program carried out by the Borough Council, the Ulverston Road box was removed, leaving the wall box in Esher Road as the only box for the Ulverston Road area. This new box will enable the people of the Ulverston Road area to post letters, post-cards and small packages without recourse to the Esher Road box or to the box outside the post office at Turner’s Parade which many people used to use, but which has now been discontinued owing to the opening of this box and also the re-organization of box distribution throughout the whole area, which comes into force with the opening of new boxes at the Wyatt Road Post Office in July. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7230 "2018-04-17T15:09:34Z")
Ohhhhhh, the cat’s eaten it. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2018, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7231 "2018-04-17T17:20:03Z")
Oh, waiter? This conversation isn’t very good. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2018, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7232 "2018-04-19T14:36:06Z")
Shut up! This is a hold-up, not a botany lesson. Right, now my fine friends, no false moves please. I want you to hand over all the lupins you’ve got. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2018, 3:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7233 "2018-04-20T03:49:23Z")
Please excuse my wife, she may not be very beautiful, and she may have no money, and she may be a little talentless, boring and dull, but on the other hand … (long pause) … sorry I can’t think of anything. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2018, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7234 "2018-04-21T22:30:30Z")
Well, no, you don’t do that, but you do duck down and shout ‘Hey! Balloons!’ when there are none about. Your whole life is becoming obsessively balloonic, you know. Why do I have to hang from this bloody gas bag all day? Don’t I mean anything to you? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2018, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7235 "2018-04-22T00:13:35Z")
Well, there’s egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg, bacon and spam; egg, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam; spam, spam, spam, egg and spam; spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam; or Lobster thermidor aux crevettes with a mornay sauce garnished with truffle pâté, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2018, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7236 "2018-04-22T02:37:16Z")
All right, I’ll have the dead unjugged rabbit fish. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2018, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7237 "2018-04-22T19:42:52Z")
Ah, well you’ve got to know where to look. Er, they’re on the side of the engine above the piston box. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2018, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7238 "2018-04-23T05:00:24Z")
_Albatross!_ ---
**Author:** ![Ken001](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/43a26b/32.png) [@Ken001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ken001)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2018, 12:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7239 "2018-04-23T12:57:19Z")
Tonight’s the night I shall be talking about of flu the subject of word association football. This is a technique out a living much used in the practice makes perfect of psychoanalysister and brother and one that has occupied piper the majority rule of my attention squad by the right number one two three four the last five years to the memory. It is quite remarkable baker charlie how much the miller’s son this so-called while you were out word association immigrants’ problems influences the manner from heaven in which we sleekit cowering timrous beasties all-American Speke, the famous explorer. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2018, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7240 "2018-04-23T17:00:26Z")
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Say no more! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=361) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=363)