# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 385
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2019, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7681 "2019-08-04T13:47:13Z")
Number 1: The Larch. The Larch. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2019, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7682 "2019-08-04T17:35:52Z")
So from now on we’re going to do things my way. For a start, David Hockney is going to design the bombs. And I’ve seen the plans! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2019, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7683 "2019-08-06T00:38:09Z")
Shut up! This a hold-up, not a botany lesson. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2019, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7684 "2019-08-06T04:02:56Z")
Well that’s sorted out then. What a mess, isn’t it. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2019, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7685 "2019-08-06T04:08:51Z")
We’ll special it for you, we’ll get it down there today and you’ll get it back in ten weeks. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2019, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7686 "2019-08-06T10:57:40Z")
What’s new Bruce going to teach, Bruce? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2019, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7687 "2019-08-06T14:14:58Z")
The story so far: Rosamund’s father has become ensnared by Mr Shabby’s extraordinary personal magnetism. Bob and Janet have eaten Mr Farquar’s goldfish during an Oxfam lunch, and Mrs Elsmore’s marriage is threatened by Doug’s insistence that he is on a different level of consciousness. Louise’s hernia has been confirmed, and Jim, Bob’s brother, has run over the editor of the ‘Lancet’ on his way to see Jenny, a freelance Pagoda designer. On the other side of the continent Napoleon still broods over the smouldering remains of a city he had crossed half the earth to conquer… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2019, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7688 "2019-08-06T17:40:46Z")
Is your name not Bruce? ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2019, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7689 "2019-08-08T11:43:52Z")
Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! Help, help! I’m being repressed! ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2019, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7690 "2019-08-08T12:56:28Z")
We love the Yangtse, Yangtse-Kiang, Flowing from Yushu down to Ching-Kiang, Passing through Chung King, Wuhan and Hoo-Kow Three thousand miles, but it gets there somehow. Oh! Szechuan’s the province and Shanghai is the port, And the Yangtse is the river that we all support. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2019, 1:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7691 "2019-08-08T13:55:47Z")
Are you \*selling \*something? ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2019, 2:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7692 "2019-08-08T14:17:31Z")
No. But what we can do, and this is between you and me, I shouldn’t really be telling you this, we’ll turn your gas on, make a hole in your pipe, you ring Hounslow emergency, they’ll be around here in a couple of days. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2019, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7693 "2019-08-08T15:38:14Z")
It’s a man’s life taking your clothes off in public. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 8, 2019, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7694 "2019-08-08T19:06:26Z")
When Martin Luther nailed his protest up to the church door in 1517, he may not have realised the full significance of what he was doing, but four hundred years later, thanks to him, my dear, I can wear whatever I want on my John Thomas. And Protestantism doesn’t stop at the simple condom. Oh, no! I can wear French Ticklers if I want. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2019, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7695 "2019-08-09T15:15:56Z")
But the police have film of Dinsdale actually nailing your head to the floor. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2019, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7696 "2019-08-13T10:57:50Z")
I’m a Yid! I’m a Heebie! I’m a hook-nose! I’m a Red Sea pedestrian, and I’m proud of it! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2019, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7697 "2019-08-14T13:12:34Z")
Er, please excuse my wife. She may appear to be rather nasty but underneath she has a heart of formica. ---
**Author:** ![atimnie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atimnie/32/11_2.png) [@atimnie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/atimnie)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2019, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7698 "2019-08-14T15:12:07Z")
He robs from the poor And gives to the rich Stupid bitch ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2019, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7699 "2019-08-14T16:01:18Z")
You can relax and enjoy this quality product, secure in the knowledge that it has been specially created for the lover of fine things and man of good taste. _fart_ Oh, sorry, you can edit that out, can’t you? Yeah, no problem. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2019, 12:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/7700 "2019-08-15T12:41:00Z")
There’s lots of people making love, but no mention of Geoff Boyott’s average. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=384) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=386)