# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 402
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2020, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8021 "2020-07-20T02:53:48Z")
At the age of fifteen, Doug and Dinsdale started attending the Ernest Pythagoras Primary School in Clerkenwell. When the Piranhas left school they were called up, but were found by an Army board to be too unstable even for National Service. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2020, 11:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8022 "2020-07-20T11:02:03Z")
Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore Galloping through the sward Dennis Moore, Dennis Moore And his horse Concorde He steals from the rich And gives to the poor Mr. Moore, Mr. Moore, Mr. Moore ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2020, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8023 "2020-07-20T15:07:01Z")
The Black Knight always triumphs! Have at you!! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2020, 4:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8024 "2020-07-20T16:11:51Z")
Another man who had his head nailed to the floor was Stig O’ Tracy. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2020, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8025 "2020-07-20T22:59:24Z")
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin! He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp, Or to have his eyes gouged out And his elbows broken. To have his kneecaps split And his body burned away And his limbs all hacked and mangled Brave Sir Robin! His head smashed in And his heart cut out And his liver removed And his bowels unplugged And his nostrils raped And his bottom burned off And his penis… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2020, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8026 "2020-07-21T02:10:03Z")
Ugh. Me heap dizzy. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2020, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8027 "2020-07-21T15:56:00Z")
My brain hurts! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2020, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8028 "2020-07-21T15:57:11Z")
Now you may think that this is very harsh behaviour, but let me tell you that our management consultants actually queried the necessity for us to employ a pantomime horse at all. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2020, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8029 "2020-07-21T23:11:09Z")
Now what happens? Well now, Launcelot, Galahad, and I wait until nightfall and then leap out of the rabbit and take the French by surprise, not only by surprise but totally unarmed! Who … Who breaks out? Er … We … Launcelot, Galahad, and I … Er … leap out of the rabbit and … Look, if we were to build a large wooden badger… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2020, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8030 "2020-07-22T01:22:19Z")
Yes, a hat. A lion taming hat. A hat with “Lion Tamer” on it. I got it at Harrods. And it lights up saying “Lion Tamer” in great big neon letters, so that you can tame them after dark when they’re less stroppy. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2020, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8031 "2020-07-22T18:54:29Z")
But there aren’t any lions in the Antarctic. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2020, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8032 "2020-07-22T20:17:16Z")
If it came from the zoo, it’d have “property of the zoo” stamped on it! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8033 "2020-07-23T00:28:53Z")
Well, it’s a difficult decision. But in accordance with our traditional principles of free enterprise and healthy competition I’m going to ask the two of you to fight to the death for it. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8034 "2020-07-23T14:40:37Z")
I’m not dead! ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8035 "2020-07-23T15:35:29Z")
This is Mr Nesbitt of Harlow New Town. Mr Nesbit would you stand up please. * * * Mr Nesbitt has learnt the value of not being seen. However he has chosen a very obvious piece of cover. _BOOM_ ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2020, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8036 "2020-07-23T23:22:41Z")
Beethoven, Mozart, Chopin, Liszt, Brahms, panties… I’m sorry. Schumann, Schubert, Mendelssohn and Bach. Names that will live for ever. But there is one composer whose name is never included with the greats. Why is it that the world never remembered the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-nürnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shönedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm? ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2020, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8037 "2020-07-24T13:24:48Z")
Wait, did you just say “Ethyl the Aardvark Goes Quantity Surveying?” ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2020, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8038 "2020-07-24T13:40:18Z")
Rex Stardust, lead electric triangle with Toad the Wet Sprocket has had to have an elbow removed following their recent successful worldwide tour of Finland. Flamboyant ambidextrous Rex apparently fell off the back of a motorcycle. “Fell off the back of a motorcyclist, most likely,” quipped ace drummer Jumbo McCluney upon hearing of the accident. Plans are already afoot for a major tour of Iceland. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2020, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8039 "2020-07-24T15:59:51Z")
I promise I won’t try to kill you. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2020, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8040 "2020-07-25T20:52:31Z")
I don’t have any ice creams; I’ve just got this albatross. ALBATROSS! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=401) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=403)