# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 404
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2020, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8061 "2020-07-30T13:17:53Z")
Splunge! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8062 "2020-08-01T02:59:22Z")
Oh, go get a glass of water! ---
**Author:** ![Locrian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/locrian/32/14146_2.png) [@Locrian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Locrian)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8063 "2020-08-01T08:52:07Z")
That, My Liege, is how we know the Earth to be banana-shaped. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8064 "2020-08-01T12:23:47Z")
It’s a simple question of _weight ratios_ ! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8065 "2020-08-01T16:07:26Z")
Fine, fine. Well, um… adopt, adapt and improve. Just a pair of knickers then, please. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8066 "2020-08-01T21:09:54Z")
``` And welcome to 'Spot the Loony', where once again we invite you to come with us all over the world to meet all kinds of people in all kinds of places, and ask you to . .. Spot the Loony! ``` ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8067 "2020-08-01T21:12:06Z")
Razor, razor, cut, cut, blood, spurt, artery, murder. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2020, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8068 "2020-08-01T21:48:37Z")
Uh, oh, here comes that wacky Queen again! ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 12:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8069 "2020-08-02T00:46:54Z")
Must be a king. He hasn’t got shit all over him. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8070 "2020-08-02T00:49:52Z")
No-Time Toulouse. The story of the wild and lawless days of the post-Impressionists. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8071 "2020-08-02T16:16:49Z")
So it was that on a cold November morning, RSM Urdoch and Sapper MacDonald, one of the most highly trained Kamikaze experts the Scottish Highlands have ever witnessed, left on a mission which was to… oh I can’t go on with this drivel. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8072 "2020-08-02T17:23:01Z")
Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8073 "2020-08-02T18:36:30Z")
I come about your advert - ‘Small white pussy cat for sale. Excellent condition’. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8074 "2020-08-02T21:24:29Z")
I mean, apart from the Marines, they’re all dead butch. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 2, 2020, 11:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8075 "2020-08-02T23:52:14Z")
``` Can I please speak! I came all the way from Oslo to do this program! I'm a professor of archaeology. I'm an expert in ancient civilizations. All right, I'm only five foot ten. All right my posture is bad, all right I slump in my chair. But I've had more women than either of you two! I've had half bloody Norway, that's what I've had! So you can keep your Robert Eversley! And you can keep your bloody Watutsi! I'd rather have my little body... my little five-foot-ten-inch body... ``` ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2020, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8076 "2020-08-03T00:22:30Z")
Now, it’s quite simple to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana. First of all you force him to drop the banana; then, second, you eat the banana, thus disarming him. You have now rendered him helpless. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2020, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8077 "2020-08-03T15:56:15Z")
It’s funny how one can go through life, as I have, disliking bananas and being indifferent to cheese, and then be able to eat, and enjoy, a banana and cheese sandwich like this. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [August 3, 2020, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8078 "2020-08-03T19:40:42Z")
I asked them to put it on my form, sir: “No killing.” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2020, 1:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8079 "2020-08-04T01:05:04Z")
My brain hurts! ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2020, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/8080 "2020-08-04T02:30:21Z")
Oh, go change your armor. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=403) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=405)