# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 466
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 2, 2022, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9312 "2022-06-02T18:20:49Z")
No. 1. The Larch. ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2022, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9313 "2022-06-03T14:02:54Z")
listen to me, smartarse, when you’re King of France,… you’ve got better things to do than go around all day remembering your bloody number. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2022, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9314 "2022-06-03T17:24:36Z")
You have to know these things when you’re King, you know. ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2022, 2:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9315 "2022-06-04T14:34:29Z")
Er… aye, yeah… the trouble is he’s been drinking a bit recently … you’ know, fourteen lagers with his breakfast… that sort of thing. ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 5, 2022, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9316 "2022-06-05T18:02:25Z")
Oh dear, I’m not supposed to go mad till 1800! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2022, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9317 "2022-06-06T12:59:50Z")
How tall are you, Professor? ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2022, 1:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9318 "2022-06-06T13:01:03Z")
And here, in Castle Anthrax, we have one punishment for setting alight the _Grail_ - shaped beacon. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2022, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9319 "2022-06-06T13:19:55Z")
Sir Robert… are you really five foot ten? ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2022, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9320 "2022-06-06T13:34:42Z")
It’s not a balloon! You stupid little thick-headed Saxon git! It’s not a balloon! Balloons is for kiddy-winkies. If you want to play with balloons, get outside. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2022, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9321 "2022-06-06T14:46:59Z")
Are you slumped forward in your chair at all? ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2022, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9322 "2022-06-06T14:53:51Z")
The text, vic! Don’t say the text! ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2022, 2:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9323 "2022-06-07T14:29:53Z")
No. You’ve not been properly trained. I demand another assistant. ---
**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2022, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9324 "2022-06-07T14:33:43Z")
The Germans playing 4-2-4, Leibnitz in goal, back four Kant, Hegel, Schopenhauer and Schelling, front-runners Schlegel, Wittgenstein, Nietzsche and Heidegger, and the mid-field duo of Beckenbauer and Jaspers. Beckenbauer obviously a bit of a surprise there. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2022, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9325 "2022-06-07T17:54:06Z")
Ni! Ni! ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2022, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9326 "2022-06-07T18:32:10Z")
A Møøse once bit my sister… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2022, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9327 "2022-06-07T21:56:30Z")
Say no _more!_ ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2022, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9328 "2022-06-08T13:38:44Z")
We were out strolling across a fiord one day when one of the local matadors came out of his tree house and flung a load of old scimitars and guillotines out that he’d got cluttering up his wine cellar and apparently rather a large proportion of them landed on my wife causing her to snuff it without much more ado. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [June 8, 2022, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9329 "2022-06-08T17:09:15Z")
He has a wife , you know. You know what she’s called. She’s called Incontinentia - Incontinentia Buttocks . ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2022, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9330 "2022-06-09T13:19:21Z")
Bunch of monkeys on the ceiling, sir! Grab your egg-and-fours and let’s get the bacon delivered! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 9, 2022, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9331 "2022-06-09T17:22:32Z")
Blimey, whatever did I give the wife? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=465) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=467)