# Monty Python non sequitur thread (Part 1) **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [April 24, 2010, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218 "2010-04-24T16:36:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 493
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9852 "2022-11-02T19:05:17Z")
If only Bicycle Repair Man were here! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9853 "2022-11-02T19:37:32Z")
The wound! _The wound!_ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9854 "2022-11-02T19:47:51Z")
Bicycle Repair Man! But… how? ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9855 "2022-11-02T20:20:31Z")
Throw him to the floor! ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2022, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9856 "2022-11-02T20:39:59Z")
No, _Brian_. ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9857 "2022-11-03T17:22:50Z")
Welcome back. And now it’s time for part eight of our series about the life and work of Ursula Hifier, the Surrey housewife who revolutionized British beekeeping in the nineteen-thirties. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9858 "2022-11-03T19:02:02Z")
I’ve had a team working on this over the past few weeks, and what we’ve come up with can be reduced to two fundamental concepts. One, people are not wearing enough hats. Two, matter is energy. In the Universe there are many energy fields which we cannot normally perceive. Some energies have a spiritual source which act upon a person’s soul. However, this soul does not exist _ab initio_ as orthodox Christianity teaches; it has to be brought into existence by a process of guided self-observation. However, this is rarely achieved owing to man’s unique ability to be distracted from spiritual matters by everyday trivia. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2022, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9859 "2022-11-03T20:18:12Z")
Why is it that the world never remembered the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-nürnburger-bratwustle-gerspurten-mitzweimache-luber-hundsfut-gumberaber-shönendanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft… of Ulm? ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9860 "2022-11-04T00:20:50Z")
Jethro Q. Walrustitty, the silly candidate with his agent and his silly wife. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9861 "2022-11-04T00:25:33Z")
Edie Phillips-Bong plays Kevin Vole, the programme planner with a problem and his comic attempts to pass the time. Week six sees the return of ‘Up The Palace’… the zany exploits of a wacky Queen, and that’s followed by ‘Limestone, Dear Limestone’… ---
**Author:** ![kwintenstraler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kwintenstraler/32/10698_2.png) [@kwintenstraler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kwintenstraler)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9862 "2022-11-04T14:35:35Z")
That’s – that’s, uh, that’s enough music for now, lads. Looks like there’s dirty work afoot. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9863 "2022-11-04T16:42:16Z")
Bring out your dead. :: bong :: Bring out your dead. :: bong :: ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9864 "2022-11-04T18:11:16Z")
Somebody. In this room. Must the murderer be. The murderer of the body is somebody in this room, which nobody must leave… leave the body in the room not to be left by anybody. Nobody leaves anybody or the body with somebody. Everybody who is anybody shall leave the body in the room body. Take the tablets Tiger. Anybody with a body but not the body is nobody. Nobody leaves the body in the …Albody me introbody albodyduce ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9865 "2022-11-04T19:50:34Z")
The jugged fish is halibut. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9866 "2022-11-04T20:46:23Z")
She may appear to be rather nasty, but underneath she has a heart of formica. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 4, 2022, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9867 "2022-11-04T23:56:47Z")
That rabbit’s dynamite! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9868 "2022-11-05T13:25:23Z")
I don’t know whether you’ll believe this sir, but one of us is actually wearing a toupee at this moment… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9869 "2022-11-05T14:49:55Z")
A _lot._ ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9870 "2022-11-05T15:04:01Z")
I’m sorry, but my client has become pretentious. I will say in his defense that he has suffered … ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [November 5, 2022, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218/9871 "2022-11-05T15:09:19Z")
Yes, sir. It was a very very bad thing to have done and I’m really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won’t happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I’ve taken up so much of the court’s valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=492) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python-non-sequitur-thread-part-1/537218.md?page=494)