# monty python **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 15, 2003, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323 "2003-05-15T01:18:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Skillet38](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Skillet38](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skillet38)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/141 "2003-05-16T21:33:55Z")
Still no sign of land it’s been 43 days sir have we started again ? ---
**Author:** ![CuriousCanuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@CuriousCanuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CuriousCanuck)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 10:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/142 "2003-05-16T22:04:37Z")
Humphrey: All right, settle down. Settle down… Now, before I begin the lesson, will those of you who are playing in the match this afternoon move your clothes down onto the lower peg immediately after lunch, before you write your letter home, if you’re not getting your hair cut, unless you’ve got a younger brother who is going out this weekend as the guest of another boy, in which case, collect his note before lunch, put it in your letter after you’ve had your hair cut, and make sure he moves your clothes down onto the lower peg for you. Now,– Wymer: Sir? Humphrey: Yes, Wymer? Wymer: My younger brother’s going out with Dibble this weekend, sir, but I’m not having my hair cut today, sir. chuckling Wymer: So, do I move my clothes down, or– Humphrey: I do wish you’d listen, Wymer. It’s perfectly simple. If you’re not getting your hair cut, you don’t have to move your brother’s clothes down to the lower peg. You simply collect his note before lunch, after you’ve done your scripture prep, when you’ve written your letter home, before rest, move your own clothes onto the lower peg, greet the visitors, and report to Mr. Viney that you’ve had your chit signed. ---
**Author:** ![YellowTail](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/b5ac83/32.png) [@YellowTail](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YellowTail)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/143 "2003-05-16T22:10:43Z")
No one enjoys a good laugh more then me. Except perhaps my wife. Oh yes, and Capt. Gooding. Come to think of it, most people enjoy a good laugh more than I do. ---
**Author:** ![Encinitas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@Encinitas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Encinitas)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2003, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/144 "2003-05-16T22:17:34Z")
It’s a blancmange! ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/145 "2003-05-17T00:43:43Z")
Well ladies and gendemen, I don’t think any of our contestants this evening have succeeded in encapsulating the intricacies of Proust’s masterwork, so I’m going to award the first prize this evening to the girl with the biggest tits. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/146 "2003-05-17T02:06:33Z")
Judean People’s Front. We’re the People’s Front of Judea! Judean People’s Front. Cawk. ---
**Author:** ![Skillet38](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Skillet38](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skillet38)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/147 "2003-05-17T02:27:59Z")
Wren’s livers ! Badger’s brains ! Jaguar’s earlobes ! Wolf nibble chips get em while they’re hot they’re lovely. ---
**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/148 "2003-05-17T02:59:30Z")
Suicide squad . . . attack! ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/149 "2003-05-17T03:02:14Z")
He says the birds are scrounging ---
**Author:** ![Penguin\_assassin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/5e9695/32.png) [@Penguin\_assassin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Penguin_assassin)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/150 "2003-05-17T03:17:39Z")
No-time Toulouse. The story of the wild and lawless days of the post-Impressionists. These IQ tests were thought to contain an unfair cultural bias against the penguin. For example, it didn’t take into account the penguins extremely poor educational system. To devise a fairer system of test, a team of our researchers spent eighteen months in Antarctica living like penguins, and subsequently dying like penguins - only quicker - proving that the penguin is a clever little sod in his own environment. ---
**Author:** ![Early\_Out](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Early\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Early_Out)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/151 "2003-05-17T03:26:49Z")
He’s upstairs, forging prescriptions for the sodding tiger. ---
**Author:** ![vl\_mungo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc8723/32.png) [@vl\_mungo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vl_mungo)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/152 "2003-05-17T03:56:30Z")
As the Conservative member of the SMDB I just go on and on until I foam at the mouth and fall over backwards. ---
**Author:** ![Skillet38](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Skillet38](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skillet38)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/153 "2003-05-17T15:02:37Z")
I’d like to see more fairy stories about the police ---
**Author:** ![Saitou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8c91f0/32.png) [@Saitou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saitou)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2003, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/154 "2003-05-17T16:14:41Z")
Hey, everybody! Somebody said mattress to Mr Lambert – twice! [stands in tea chest] …in ancient times, walk upon England’s mountains green… ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2003, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/155 "2003-05-18T03:52:25Z")
\<\\> Thank Bob I can only fit two at one time, but thanks to you guy, they’re now rotating on and off randomly. I’ll be sending you my shrink bills if it starts interfering with my work. Forturnately for you, I work for the Government, so it will probably pass without notice. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2003, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/156 "2003-05-18T03:53:27Z")
that’s guys (your wife’s best friend. . .) (let the heathen spill them. . .) ---
**Author:** ![Stccrd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8797f3/32.png) [@Stccrd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stccrd)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2003, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/157 "2003-05-18T04:04:20Z")
What is brown and sounds like a bell? Dung! ---
**Author:** ![Tinkertoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f19dbf/32.png) [@Tinkertoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tinkertoy)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2003, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/158 "2003-05-18T05:05:13Z")
Well I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to shoot you. ---
**Author:** ![elfje](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19b73/32.png) [@elfje](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfje)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2003, 3:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/159 "2003-05-18T15:05:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ChaosGod \* > \*\*bigus dickus \*\* Nautius Maxiumus Incontinentiae…Bucket! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![CuriousCanuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/d2c977/32.png) [@CuriousCanuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CuriousCanuck)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2003, 3:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323/160 "2003-05-18T15:08:37Z")
-Un cadeau! -Un cadeau? -A present. -Ah, un cadeau! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-python/175323.md?page=9)