# Monty, you are a wretched LIAR! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 22, 2003, 2:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033 "2003-09-22T02:43:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/181 "2003-09-23T07:07:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by yosemitebabe \* > \*\*Sheerdee Light, you are all innocence as to what Mr. B is talking about? Completely unaware of what he might be implying? > > A little hard to swallow. > > I wanted to pop in and say that **Ryle Dup** has it right about that previous thread that ambushed alluded to. (And I appreciate Ryle Dup’s post on the matter.) Ambushed has completely warped the account of what that thread is about, and has never once behaved in anyway closely resembling rational. Ambushed has flatly (yes, I’ll dare to use the word) **LIED** about my stance on that thread. But will we ever hear him admit that? No. He’s too busy accusing everyone else of lying, and too busy using that colored text. > > That prior thread was already dying on the vine when ambushed started in on it, so most of you haven’t read it. (And it ended up as a nightmare anyway.) My opinion of ambushed was pretty well formed then, and he’s completely cemented my opinion now. > > And, for the record, I’ll repeat: He has lied, flagrantly, blatantly, bald-faced _lied,_ and yet he comes here and does more of it; all the while acting as if he is the put-upon victim on all counts. Whatever case he was trying to make has been lost in the hysterics, colored text, and (for me, anyway) his past history of blatantly lying. So there you go. That’s my take on it. \*\* Read the rest of the thread, sunshine. Look for a post from me with your name in it. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/182 "2003-09-23T07:20:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Monty \* > **Excepting, of course, for the minor fact of it not being a lie as it actually does accurate portray the venom you spewed.** Liar. But at least it’s a NEW lie that tries to evade the central facts here by suggesting that you actually know you lied after all. The evidence strongly suggests that you can’t even keep your lies straight any more. > [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Monty \* > \*\*BTW, don’t stop the rainbow effect on my account. Apparently you’ve a fan or two of your art. \*\* No, honey, what you’re thinking about is that a handful of intellectually honest posters have showed up. I know how much you hate that, though. I’m sure it spoils yours and others’ hateful self-delusions about feeling justified in so viciously attacking me for telling the truth. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/183 "2003-09-23T07:25:37Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Sheerdee Light \* > \*\*My, my. What a deliciously wicked monumental rolling ball of misdirected bullshit have we here? Dear dopers, I lurked and laughed my ass off until I could stand no more! I want in! > > IIRC, the diversion occured just about the time ambushed posted the following: > > “While I’m sure there’s ordinary variation from bishop to bishop, often a bishop will ask you some extremely private and personal questions which must be answered to their full gratifica…, er, satisfaction before being granted a recommend.” > > Wellhellanfuckination, any sped monkey with a bus pass can see the ever so slightly naughty-yet totally on target-word play in those remarks. But not the severely incapcitated Monty! Nope, dopes! Instead, Monty dishes up this amazingly brainfried pearl of an evaluation when he concludes: > > “In some Mormon questions, you made the insane assertion that those undergoing a particular interview had to answer the question for someone’s gratification.” > > Monty…the word “often” means, often! Not to be confused with always. As in “ambushed often gets hot under the collar, but Monty is always a fuckhead”. See? It’s really quite easy! > abushed is guilty on 3 counts! > > 1. Mainlining humor into a serious topic. > 2. Using big words that Monty can’t understand. > 3. Wrongfully concluding that injecting actual cites/links will result in immediate personal and/or serious revelation on Monty’s part without taking into consideration the time lag while we all tap our toes and wait for Monty to find someone to dumb it down and read them to him. > > And what shall we charge poor Monty with? Is there a towaway zone for posters/posers operating a disabled brain on a public message board? > > Monty, the Mormon Alliance (which ambushed conviently delivered on to your doorstep and mistakenly assumed you’d read them) exists for the sole purpose of providing legal resource, reporting and followup for LDS victims of sexual abuse by other church members… you know, like Bishops, duh. Does it surprise you, Monty, that the Morg doesn’t publicize the fact that some (not all, you embellishing freak) of their Bishops are going over the line when they interview and jerking off kids in closets? > > Here, honey, get some one to read these to you: > [snip] > > There’s a sample for you, Monty, for your real aloud pleasure. > > And the ultimate bitch of it all, is that over 150 posts or so have been directed away from the serious topic at hand, that should be of concern to anyone with at least half a brain and a voice, to this jerk off journey into clown college drop out drivel! > > Adam yax hit the nail on the head when he wrote: > > “The one thing that ambushed doesn’t realize is that nobody cares if he is correct or not.” > > Fuckmewithachainsaw, stamp out ignorance? Lay down Monty, and let us tap dance on your back and start with you! Oh, and BTW, congratulations! You’ve just been nominated for the “Cyber Contortionist of the Year Award” for posting with your head straight up your ass! ROTFLMFAO! > Sheerdee Light \*\* That has GOT to be one of the most hilarious, dead-on, arrogant-lying-asshole-deflating posts I’ve ever read! Welcome to the Straight Dope, Sheerdee! Yee-ha! ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/184 "2003-09-23T07:28:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by ambushed \* > Read the rest of the thread, sunshine. Look for a post from me with your name in it. I remember that thread very well, thank you. It had you nutting out all over the place, calling everyone a wide variety of nasty names, pretty much flipping out. And this was in Great Debates too. Nice. Real nice. And what is this with the complete quoting of others’ posts, and having to quote only _one_ person per post? What is the deal with you? You can master the colorful text function but can’t figure out how to edit quotes? Yeesh. As if the hamsters need that. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/185 "2003-09-23T07:30:24Z")
For all the sub-morons who have suggested that **Sheerdee Light** is my “sock puppet” (or I his, for that matter), I’m bound to point out the very, very obvious facts and say that if I could be that downright hilarious and pomposity-deflating, I’d let Monty and SPOOFE lie and abuse me all they wanted! Only a specious sub-moron would imagine that Sheerdee’s posts and my own could have been written by the same person. But there’s obviously plenty of specious sub-morons here, so I’m not surprised by such idiotic accusations! ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/186 "2003-09-23T07:35:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by yosemitebabe \* > \*\*Yeah, yeah, I’ll suppose I can accept that apology with the same half-hearted, somewhat begrudging spirit in which it was given. \*\* What the fuck MORE do you want? The fact that you can’t bring yourself to admit that my apology was sincere is just more proof that you have no respect for honesty. You’re obviously just a sad, bitter, hateful, whining little wretch who is here for no other reason than pure, vicious vengeace. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/187 "2003-09-23T07:40:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by yosemitebabe \* > \*\*I remember that thread very well, thank you. > > It had you nutting out all over the place, calling everyone a wide variety of nasty names, pretty much flipping out. And this was in Great Debates too. > > Nice. Real nice. > > And what is this with the complete quoting of others’ posts, and having to quote only _one_ person per post? What is the deal with you? You can master the colorful text function but can’t figure out how to edit quotes? > > Yeesh. As if the hamsters need that. \*\* What stupid shit you have for brains, woman! What an offensively dishonest and hatefuly unfair rant! When you start attacking all the assholes like you who have come here for no other reason than to post vicious personal attacks that completely evade the facts, THEN I’ll listen you your laughable, sanctimonious bullshit about “hamsters”! Why don’t YOU shut the fuck up, since it’s obvious you have absolutely NOTHING of any value to say? Maybe I’ll think about your idiotic complaints when YOU stop posting! ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/188 "2003-09-23T07:51:54Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Monty \* > \*\*Criminy. & some folks wonder about my blood pressure. \*\* Yep, outright fabrication and lies and continually denying responsibility for your own mean-spirited actions probably increases anxiety and tension. Lyin’ for the Lord might get you into one or other of your LDS heavens (but only if your God endorses lying, of course), but it’s no good for you in _this_ world, that’s for sure. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/189 "2003-09-23T07:55:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Monty \* > \*\*And we have a new entry in the Total Freaking Loon (lightweight) category! Introducing…Sherdee! \*\* What a pathetic, simpering, smarmy fucking asshole you are. Not that we needed reminding, of course. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 7:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/190 "2003-09-23T07:57:14Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by RoundGuy \* > \*\*Sorry **Sheerdee** , but anytime I see this I’m inclined to think – newbie, lightweight, moron, amateur, dumbass, not worth my time, etc. \*\* Funny, that’s what honest people think of _you!_ What are the odds? ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 8:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/191 "2003-09-23T08:02:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jack@ss \* > **Monty, you disappoint me. I was anticipating a real good one from you & you just dismissed everything I said without addressing anything. I can understand that, it was kind of a rambling post and reads like Abe Simpson.** You mean you expected more from such a lying, sanctimonious lackwit like Monty? I guess hope springs eternal! Me, I expected nothing more from him that just exactly the lying, evasive vomitus he spewed forth. I guess I’m more of a realist. ---
**Author:** ![Joe\_Random](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e8c25b/32.png) [@Joe\_Random](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joe_Random)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 8:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/192 "2003-09-23T08:10:49Z")
You know, reading this thread is kind of like watching a train wreck on slow motion. I know that nothing good can come of it. I know that, in the long run, I’d be better off just ignoring it, but it holds my interest for some macabre reason. **ambushed** , do you _really_ think that you’re doing yourself any favors by continuing to hurl personal insults at everyone who disagrees with you? You’ve managed to alienate the vast majority of your perspective audience just by acting like a total asshole. Maybe you’re justified. Maybe not. It doesn’t really matter. The point is, you’re converting almost everyone who reads or responds to this thread into your enemy by the sheer force of the vitriol you’re spewing. Maybe Monty lied. Maybe he misunderstood you. No one cares anymore. You will be remembered as the loser of this particular pitting because of you inability to keep a cool head. At this point, I full expect you to label me a “liar” or an “idiot”. Maybe you’ll insist that I have the reading comprehension of a retarded, dyslexic monkey. I’m sure there are plenty of ways that you can insult me. But do you know what? Doing so will only make you seem even more unstable than you’re already coming across as. Insulting me for pointing out the obvious fact that you’re hurting your position with every post will only serve to undermine your position even more. Take my advice. Step back and cool off some. You’ll see that everyone has stopped caring about whether you’re right or wrong. They’re just fueling your anger in an attempt to make you dance for their amusement, and you’re obliging them. Hell, I found it amusing at first, too. But I think it’s time for this particular train wreck to end. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 8:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/193 "2003-09-23T08:13:21Z")
Okay, I’m done for tonight. If you dishonest, hate-fueled ranters want more responses from me to grow this thread ever longer, just keep on slinging such hateful, petty, fact-evading bullshit and I’ll respond later. Maybe we’re all bozos on this bus, but I believe that honest people can easily tell the difference between the handful of honest posts here and the lies and bullshit and gang-banging abuse that has been pretty much dominated this thread. Maybe Monty will find the intellectual honesty to admit his offenses and I can call it quits here. Or maybe the Cubs will win the penant. Who knows? G’night! ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/194 "2003-09-23T08:26:40Z")
> [@](#): > > ambushed wrote: > > The fact that you can’t bring yourself to admit that my apology was sincere is just more proof that you have no respect for honesty. I took your half-hearted “apology” in the spirit in which it was given. Piss-poor non-apology, still admitting that you believe that I approve of “child abuse,” (the “abusive” treatment of children), but you do say that you wished that you’d phrased your sentiments a little nicer. You’re not for real. ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 9:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/195 "2003-09-23T09:34:09Z")
‘Kin’ hell - 6 refutation posts in a row… you’re not related to **Zenster** are you, **ambushed**?!? In other news: give it a fucking rest will ye? ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 9:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/196 "2003-09-23T09:45:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jjimm \* > \*\*‘Kin’ hell - 6 refutation posts in a row… you’re not related to **Zenster** are you, **ambushed**?!? > > In other news: give it a fucking rest will ye? \*\* LIAR!!! [sub]Sorry, couldn’t help myself…:D[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 9:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/197 "2003-09-23T09:47:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by spooje \* > \*\*[sub]Sorry, couldn’t help myself…:D[/sub] \*\* Yes you could! You could help yourself. You could! LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE! ---
**Author:** ![yosemite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/3ab097/32.png) [@yosemite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yosemite)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/198 "2003-09-23T10:12:20Z")
You both are being hate-filled and dishonest. You are truth-hating!!! YOU ARE LYING THROUGH YOUR _STINKING_ TEETH!!! ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_Wright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Steve\_Wright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_Wright)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 10:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/199 "2003-09-23T10:23:48Z")
_I_ didn’t get a rebuttal. I didn’t get a single gratuitous personal slur. _:: sniff ::_ Nobody likes me. I’m going to sit in a corner and eat worms now. (Well, either that, or **ambushed** is tacitly admitting to using a certain amount of hyperbole. Which is not much of an admission, but may be all we’re going to get … ) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/the_great_unwashed/32/4791_2.png) [@The\_Great\_Unwashed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Great_Unwashed)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 10:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033/200 "2003-09-23T10:24:47Z")
Please God, although I am an atheist so you owe me nothing, could see your way clear to killing this thread? In return I promise I will never kick a puppy again and I won’t swear for a whole fucking week… _The Great Unwashed_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033.md?page=9) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/monty-you-are-a-wretched-liar/203033.md?page=11)