Moon Landing

[Terrifel]

Astronaut pee is different. It has been sanctified by science.

I wonder if the Apollo astronauts have trouble with people stealing their pee? When they go in for checkups, I mean? I could see that being kind of tempting to a medical tech. “Sir, we need you to fill up another cup; the last one… er, spilled. Yes, spilled…”

I kind of envy Bart Sibrel in a way. I wish I had the right to wear a t-shirt reading: “Punched out by a moon astronaut.” I wonder if there’s any way I could persuade Buzz Aldrin to pee on me.

[goodie]

Okaaaay, there’s more than a little hero worship going on in this thread, and I’m starting to wonder now if there is anything that NASA astronauts could claim to have done that some of you would NOT believe…

[Terrifel]

Technically I was not engaging in hero worship. That was astronaut pee worship, which is a substantively distinct predilection (though admittedly not recognized as such by the DSM-IV).

I would not believe an astronaut if they told me they did not pee. That is just crazy.

[goodie]

Let the Tang jokes begin.

[dehacker]

Are you saying that Tang is astronaut pee?? Because that would explain a lot, quite honestly.

[Chefguy]

Of course there was a moon landing. It was an emergency mission conceived because of the looming cheese shortage, when those bastard Swiss created an international crisis. It seems nobody ever officially claimed Wisconsin, so the Swiss stepped in and took it for themselves. This created an immediate potential for a cheese embargo, so the government sent Buzz Aldrin to the moon to stake mining rights, and to bring back some quality goods while they sorted it all out.

You didn’t notice any gap in the availability of cheese back then did you? Well, there you go.

[vison]

A friend’s dad worked on the lander, applying the coating or paint or whatever it was and he took one of his wife’s pubic hairs and laminated it onto the surface and this is, I am assured, a true story and who am I to doubt it?

If it’s not true, it should be.

[Princhester]

@Terrifel

Did we really not pee on the Moon? I find that somewhat hard to believe. Astronauts working on the Moon’s surface would need to stay hydrated. They surely wouldn’t avoid drinking before they landed, would they? I seem to recall that the suits were catheterized for convenience in this matter. And there’d be no point in hauling any of that stuff back into orbit; every liter of astronaut urine would be one less kilogram of moon rocks to haul back. So unless there was some explicit regulation in place about NOT contaminating the Moon by peeing on it, all that material must have been jettisoned from the lander before liftoff. Therefore it seems very likely to me that our astronauts did indeed successfully pee on the Moon.

I assume that the whole significance of the US astronauts peeing (or more particularly not peeing) on the Moon is that peeing is associated with territory marking, like what dogs do. Somehow, the type of indirect dumping of some pee that you describe just doesn’t cut it. You can’t claim territory that way. You’ve gotta whip it out and spray it direct.

As far as I’m concerned, the US may have been the first to put a man on the Moon, but the opportunity to get up there and Mark It Out as Territory in proper manly fashion is still there to be taken.

[Chefguy]

@Princhester

I assume that the whole significance of the US astronauts peeing (or more particularly not peeing) on the Moon is that peeing is associated with territory marking, like what dogs do. Somehow, the type of indirect dumping of some pee that you describe just doesn’t cut it. You can’t claim territory that way. You’ve gotta whip it out and spray it direct.

As far as I’m concerned, the US may have been the first to put a man on the Moon, but the opportunity to get up there and Mark It Out as Territory in proper manly fashion is still there to be taken.

Yeah, well then explain the Mar Urinari (Sea of Pee) that is now on all the lunar maps. Din’t think so.

[goodie]

So we pee on it, then Russia will just come along and masturbate on it, then China will violate even more directly, then pretty soon every country that can afford to build a rocket is finding new ways to “mark” poor Luna as theirs. Poor, poor Luna.

[Revenant_Threshold]

@goodie

So we pee on it, then Russia will just come along and masturbate on it, then China will violate even more directly, then pretty soon every country that can afford to build a rocket is finding new ways to “mark” poor Luna as theirs. Poor, poor Luna.

Well, what did she expect? Sitting up there, flaunting herself like a cheap whore.

She was asking for it, your honour.

[gonzomax]

http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5iJwhwx2HUwU8kW5KJMNl2UNfPmeQ
Of course we know that India has joined the club . The moon shots have been off shored too.(or is that off planeted)

[goodie]

“Moon probe”

I rest my case.

[ExTank]

@Chronos

To sum up:

In 1969, some astronauts went into the top of a really big rocket, big enough that it could have gotten them to the Moon. While those astronauts were in the top of the rocket, the rocket took off.

Radar stations from around the world showed that rocket, or portions thereof, heading toward the Moon.

Radio transmissions of the voices of those three men, detectable to anyone with a ham set were picked up from the expected location of the top of the rocket, with time delays consistent with their expected distance from the Earth, were picked up in the direction the rocket was expected to be.

After an amount of time consistent with travel to the Moon and back plus some puttering around on the surface, those three men splashed down into the ocean, still in the top of the rocket that took off from Florida.

They brought back with them still and video film of people in spacesuits walking around in a barren environment, full of dust that behaved differently than dust does anywhere in an atmosphere. Further, said films encompassed larger areas than any vacuum chamber ever built on Earth.

They also brought back rocks with a mineral composition unlike any found on Earth.

They claim to have left behind on the Moon a corner reflector, in exactly the location where laser rangefinding experiments from Earth have confirmed that a corner reflector exists on the Moon.

The Soviet Union, the second-most-powerful entity in the world, and the group with the greatest vested interest in the US not getting to the Moon, offered their congratulations to the US during and after the time of the mission.

The conclusion is left as an exercise for the reader.

So…what are you trying to say here?

gdr

[Anne_Neville]

@goodie

So we pee on it, then Russia will just come along and masturbate on it, then China will violate even more directly, then pretty soon every country that can afford to build a rocket is finding new ways to “mark” poor Luna as theirs. Poor, poor Luna.

Mr. Neville has peed on Luna.

When she was a kitten, she decided one day that the stream going into the toilet looked like a fun toy to bat at.

[Mahaloth]

Wow, this thread has changed since I last checked.

:eek:

[Irishman]

What would it take to pee on the moon? First, you need a space suit with some sort of fly. A simple zipper probably won’t be sufficient, as you need to seal the inside or all the air in the suit will leave, making it hard to breathe. So assume there’s some sort of pressure ring around the area, but not tight enough to restrict flow.

Lower gravity won’t be a problem. You could get more height if you so desired. And longer range.

Temperature shouldn’t be a problem. Yes, the moon’s surface can range from -300 to +300 deg F, but that variance is the surface as it sits exposed or blocked from sunlight. Space itself has no temperature. There is no air there to make you feel cold. Your tissue and urine have temperature and thermal mass, so you won’t instantly freeze or anything. The stream could exit normally, though staying exposed facing the shade could get cool fairly quickly.

The big issue is pressure. No, the pressure difference isn’t going to rip it off or suck you through the hole in your suit, but the suction will pull your blood into the exposed area. This could rapidly impede the ability to continue peeing. And your suit better be able to accomodate the growth, or you can’t close up again until to get back in the cabin.

And now you have one hell of a hicky to explain.

RJKUgly said:

If Sibrel, the police, and DA had decided to pursue assault charges* I (and probably about a million other people) would have gladly chipped in for Aldrin’s defense.

*which I assume they could have done, it looks like there was no doubt Aldrin dropped Sibrel when Aldrin really wasn’t in any actual physical danger.

There is a strong case that Sibrel could have been charged with assault as well. He was actively interfering with Buzz going about his own business, blocking Buzz’s path, and thumping Buzz in the chest with a bible, while verbally haranguing him. I think the DA recongized a definite case of “I could never get a conviction on that”. Is there such a thing as “justifiable battery”?

[Baker]

@chacoguy420

Anybody want to talk about Buzz giving himself holy communion on the Moon?

Actually, this IS a story I haven’t heard. Is he Catholic, and did he administer himself the sacrament with pre-consecrated elements? Or is he some other denomination?

I’m Episcopalian, and with us laypeople can be commisioned to take the bread and wine to those that are, for good reasons, unable to come to the church. Homebound handicapped, those in the hospital, and so on. Of course priests can visit too, but they don’t always have time for doing everything themselves.

Oh, and GO BUZZ!!!

[Baldwin]

Buzz Aldrin is Catholic. I think he got some kind of permission from his bishop. (Though I could be wrong. fortunately, the Church Police won’t knock down your door.)

I’m imagining some sort of crotch-specific airlock built into a moonsuit. A Lunar Micturation System, or LMS.

[Larry_Borgia]

@vison

A friend’s dad worked on the lander, applying the coating or paint or whatever it was and he took one of his wife’s pubic hairs and laminated it onto the surface and this is, I am assured, a true story and who am I to doubt it?

If it’s not true, it should be.

I choose to believe this story.