# Morbid: What do you want to have played on your funeral? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 3, 2001, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067 "2001-07-03T09:05:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Aghris](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecccb3/32.png) [@Aghris](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aghris)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/1 "2001-07-03T09:05:48Z")
OK, so I was listening to **REM** yesterday. No big deal, I do this almost every day. The best CD they ever made is, in my opinion, **New Adventures in HiFi**. For some reason, the fifth and sixth song on the album do strange stuff to each other. They are very different, yet the compliment each other like they were written in one go. And then it struck me: these are the songs that I want to have played on my funeral, in sequence. First, **E-bow the Letter** because of the following lyrics: _I don’t want to disappoint you I’m not here to anoint you I would lick your feet But is that the sickest move? I wear my own crown and sadness and sorrow And who’d have thought tomorrow could be so strange? My loss, and here we go again_ And then: **Leave** \*Shifting the dream nothing could bring me further from my old friend time. shifting the dream it’s charging the scene I know where I marked the signs. I suffer the dreams of a world gone mad I like it like that and I know it I know it well, ugly and sweet, that temper madness with an even extreme.\* These two songs describe perfectly how I feel now and would represent me best when I die tomorrow. What about you? Do you know what you want to be your farewell speech? ---
**Author:** ![Carina42](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Carina42](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Carina42)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/2 "2001-07-03T11:09:37Z")
I have never given it thought, so I don’t know. However, my dad wanted Borodin’s “On The Steppes Of Central Asia” (classical piece) played at his funeral. He died overseas, so we really couldn’t have a proper funeral for him. I bought the score, & had it tattooed around my upper arm, as a tribute. ---
**Author:** ![False\_God](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee7513/32.png) [@False\_God](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/False_God)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 12:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/3 "2001-07-03T12:09:19Z")
Tschaikovsky’s Marche Slave. Then “Flight of the Bumblebee” just to screw with everyone’s mind. Keep in mind I alternate between wanting to be cremated and have an ounce of my ashes mixed with an ounce of really good dope and then smoked @ the wake; or put intact with blades in the coffin so I can fight the werewolves when I get to Valhalla. Whichever it is, I think it’s going to be interesting! ---
**Author:** ![pldennison](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9fc29f/32.png) [@pldennison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pldennison)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 12:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/4 "2001-07-03T12:10:10Z")
_Dead Skunk (In The Middle Of The Road)_ by Loudon Wainwright III. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/5 "2001-07-03T12:27:06Z")
I’m hoping not to have a funeral. Just have the stiff cremated as soon as possible and ashes distributed in some suitable body of water, possibly the toilet. If someone wants to do something in my memory, I would prefer for them to sit down at the piano, or grab the guitar or saxophone or flute or sousaphone or whatever, and actually MAKE some damn homemade music. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/6 "2001-07-03T13:09:18Z")
The Police, “Shadows in the Rain” _Woke up in my clothes again this morning Don’t know exactly where I am_ 😃 ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 1:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/7 "2001-07-03T13:14:07Z")
A good friend of mine had Star Wars playing at his funeral. Very appropriate if you knew him. Made me smile 🙂 I don’t know what I’d choose, if anything. Something celtic, maybe. Or the theme to E.T. Or Weird Al Yankovic polka medleys. ---
**Author:** ![Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/41988e/32.png) [@Tequila\_Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tequila_Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/8 "2001-07-03T16:59:07Z")
I don’t want a funeral either, but I wouldn’t mind “Birdhouse In Your Soul” by TMBG or some Replacements being played at the bar while my family and friends raise a glass. ---
**Author:** ![Opengrave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/919ad9/32.png) [@Opengrave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Opengrave)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/9 "2001-07-03T17:12:53Z")
_Fade to Black_ by **Metallica** Life it seems, will fade away Drifting further every day Getting lost within myself Nothing matters no one else I have lost the will to live Simply nothing more to give There is nothing more for me Need the end to set me free Things are not what they used to be Missing one inside of me Deathly lost, this can’t be real Cannot stand this hell I feel Emptiness is filing me To the point of agony Growing darkness taking dawn I was me, but now He’s gone No one but me can save myself, but it to late Now I can’t think, think why I should even try Yesterday seems as though it never existed Death Greets me warm, now I will just say good-bye Or maybe _The Way I Wanna Go_ by **Sentenced** I know of a heaven… and damn sure… I know of a Hell… if you could take a look into this fighter’s mind… the things you’d see. What would you think? How would you feel? If you could really know me…mmm… Can you see this Hell I feel inside? A tragedy in a human mind. Aaaaaaargh! That’s what I am!!! So turn away, turn away and go. Turn away while you still can. Turn away. The way I’m gonna go is not the way you want to go! This reign that I have built myself, over the years, will crumble down on me. Life’s double edged sword gives both pleasure and pain. And it’s MY cross to be carried!!! Can you see this chaos-ridden mind? This tragedy, this tragedy of a human mind. Aaaaaaargh! That’s how I am!!! "It might seem to you that we are same. But that’s just a part of the illusion of life. There’s no perfection in this world, and in the end we’re but two strangers sailing our personal seas of sorrow…" I’ve been to heaven! (and let me tell you) I have been “down there” So turn away, turn away and go. Turn away while you still can. Turn away. The way I’m gonna go is not the way you want to go! Turn away, Turn away… This is the way I wanna go (or just about anything else by Sentenced) NP: **Willie Nelson** - _Red Headed Stranger_ ---
**Author:** ![BunnyGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/22d042/32.png) [@BunnyGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BunnyGirl)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/10 "2001-07-03T17:15:57Z")
Well, I hope to be cremated and let everyone have a giant party. More to my liking. If there needed to be a moment of silence at the beginning, I’d have the hymn, _Great Is Thy Faithfulness_ played, and then…let the party begin! The hymn is just the one that’s always been a favorite of mine. Maybe then Listz’s Hungarian Rhapsodies or Beethoven’s Ninth (or is it the Fifth? Which one has the chorus for “Ode To Joy” in it? That one) for a little flair. Love 'em both. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Zero](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@Saint\_Zero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Zero)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/11 "2001-07-03T17:24:10Z")
BunnyGirl: Ode to Joy is the Ninth. 🙂 My friend had “Amazing Grace” on the bagpipes played at his. I’m tempted to do the same. ---
**Author:** ![PolishSausage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@PolishSausage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PolishSausage)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/12 "2001-07-03T17:35:59Z")
I have to think about which song. But I hope there would be someone who would be moved to read that poem from Four Weddings and a Funeral. That was the best. ~t ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/13 "2001-07-03T17:56:56Z")
Depending on my mood, either Monty Python’s _Always Look on the Bright Side of Life_ (complete with the often-edited-out “Life’s a piece of s–t” verse), or “Weird Al” Yankovic’s _Dare to Be Stupid._ ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/14 "2001-07-03T18:07:53Z")
I’m going to be cremated, too (right after Lupe Velez and I finish flushing Ike). But I want heavily-veiled mourners to carry my ashes to the local duck pond while weeping copiously and playing Chopin’s Sonata No. 2, that funeral march they play whenever bigwigs die in Russia. On the way back home, they can all truck to the tune of “I’ll Be Glad When You’re Dead, You Rascal, You.” ---
**Author:** ![Bumbazine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bumbazine/32/362_2.png) [@Bumbazine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bumbazine)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/15 "2001-07-03T18:26:07Z")
I hate funerals. Been to altogether too many of them lately. But if I had to have one, I think I’d like either _Danse Macabre_ or _Whiter Shade Of Pale,_ or maybe just hire a piper. ---
**Author:** ![Mambo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a587f6/32.png) [@Mambo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mambo)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/16 "2001-07-03T18:45:13Z")
I’d like to have everyone listen to _Dark Side of the Moon_ while watching _The Wizard of Oz_ on mute. If only one song, then I’d pick the last song on the album _Eclipse_: All that you touch All that you see All that you taste All you feel All that you love All that you hate All you distrust All you save All that you give All that you deal All that you buy beg, borrow or steal All you create All you destroy All that you do All that you say All that you eat everyone you meet All that you slight everyone you fight All that is now All that is gone All that’s to come and everything under the sun is in tune but the sun is eclipsed by the moon ---
**Author:** ![Tranquilis](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tranquilis/32/3639_2.png) [@Tranquilis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tranquilis)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/17 "2001-07-03T19:06:28Z")
First, if I can get away with it, I want my naked corpse dropped in a big hole and a tree planted on top of it. No ceremony, just feed the tree. If not, cremate me and feed the tree. If people wanna have a wake, that’s cool, and I have a provision to cover a pretty decent memorial party. The attendees get to pick the music, except the first one: ‘You Rascal You’, written by Sam Theard, as recorded by Louis Armstrong. Yes, I know, he’s not the first to record it, but that’s my favorite version, and it’s my wake, anyway. Gotta start the party on the right note: None too reverent. ---
**Author:** ![Abe\_Babe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3ab097/32.png) [@Abe\_Babe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Abe_Babe)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2001, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/18 "2001-07-03T21:23:49Z")
No question in my mind. A single bagpiper playing “Amazing Grace.” Even at a non-funereal occasion, that tune brings a lump to my throat. Of course, the piper wouldn’t be allowed to wear anything under the kilt. ---
**Author:** ![RocketHorse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RocketHorse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RocketHorse)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2001, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/19 "2001-07-04T00:23:43Z")
chopin’s funeral march. it puts the fun in “funeral”. ---
**Author:** ![Kat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b19c9b/32.png) [@Kat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kat)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2001, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067/20 "2001-07-04T00:27:56Z")
Most of the time (including now) I plan to have _Prop Me Up Beside The Jukebox If I Die_ played. All I worry about is whether my family will go along with that. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/morbid-what-do-you-want-to-have-played-on-your-funeral/71067.md?page=2)