# More Jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** comedian-jokes\ **Created:** [February 27, 2020, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629 "2020-02-27T23:57:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 355
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7092 "2025-12-27T01:33:09Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > I guess i made a hash of it. Hey, sometimes you mash it, sometimes you hash it. Don’t get a chip on your shoulder about it. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7093 "2025-12-27T02:08:41Z")
Enough of this spuddering. Taters gonna tate. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7094 "2025-12-27T02:10:59Z")
Au gratin you that, but I still think you have a bit of a thin skin. ---
**Author:** ![Wallaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/dc4da7/32.png) [@Wallaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wallaby)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7095 "2025-12-27T03:01:09Z")
I’d like to chip in, but I can’t think of anything……………… ---
**Author:** ![Railer13](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/railer13/32/9742_2.png) [@Railer13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Railer13)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7096 "2025-12-27T03:04:13Z")
There was a vote to decide if we should stop this hijack, and the eyes have it. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7097 "2025-12-27T03:17:23Z")
I hope I wasn’t too hard on the Prof. I only have a problem with those whose viewpoints or sense of humor have a key difference from mine. And I see gnocchi difference between us. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7098 "2025-12-27T03:31:29Z")
And Irish you a Murphy Christmas and a Happy _New_ Year as well. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7099 "2025-12-27T03:37:58Z")
I’ll latke have that one… ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 10:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7100 "2025-12-27T10:25:10Z")
Seven hours since the last potato pun. Maybe the hijack is finally spuddering out. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7101 "2025-12-27T14:18:42Z")
Do not let the fact that potatoes do not usually appear in a play, a fable or a pomme de terre you. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7102 "2025-12-27T15:33:35Z")
> [@solost](#): > > I hope I wasn’t too hard on the Prof. \*_snerk\_\* You said ‘hard on’. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7103 "2025-12-27T16:22:03Z")
> [@Railer13](#): > > There was a vote to decide if we should stop this hijack, and the eyes have it. > [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Maybe the hijack is finally spuddering out. Apologies if I was hijacking, but can a run of potato puns be considered a hijack in an already pun-heavy joke thread? In any case, yeah, I’m about done with the spud puns. It was fun roasting the Prof with them for awhile (and getting it right back), but I’m feeling a little baked today- my brain is fried. > [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > …a pomme de terre you Nice one 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7104 "2025-12-27T17:01:13Z")
Annual report from the Defector. > **[What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums Last Year? | Defector](https://defector.com/what-did-we-get-stuck-in-our-rectums-last-year-6)** > > This is the time of year to be grateful for not having things stuck in our asses, and to think of those less fortunate than us. So spare a thought for those Americans who misjudged the capacity of their own orifices. All reports are taken from the... ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 27, 2025, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7105 "2025-12-27T17:11:58Z")
### How to marry a farm girl. First, a tractor. * * * ### What do you call a potato that looks like a penis? A dictator. What do you call a regular looking potato? A commentator. There are two potatoes standing on the side of the road, how do you tell which one is the hooker? The one that says Idaho on it. * * * ### What did the doctor say when the gingerbread man told him he’d sprained his leg? Try icing it. * * * ### Santa Claus and Sir Lancelot in full armour were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant. The cashier looked up. “Who was first?” Santa pointed to iron clad man. It was the knight before Christmas. * * * ### My New Year’s resolution for 2026: To accomplish all the goals I didn’t do in 2025, which includes those from 2024, 2023, 2022, 2021… ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2025, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7106 "2025-12-28T14:10:33Z")
### I recently sold my vacuum cleaner. It was just collecting dust. * * * ### Everybody says you should say no to drugs… …but if you’re talking to drugs, it’s probably already too late. * * * ### What are your New Year’s resolutions? I’m upgrading to 2460×4820. * * * ### I really appreciate how some people still give gifts to poor guys on the street, even after Christmas. For example, yesterday I saw someone giving his credit card and $400 to a guy who only had a knife… * * * ### Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer? No, they already have names. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2025, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7107 "2025-12-28T15:58:57Z")
**A truck carrying Worcestershire sauce crashes…** **Dispatcher:** What’s the situation? **Witness:** It’s hard to say. ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2025, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7108 "2025-12-28T19:07:14Z")
[![](https://images.spot.im/image/upload/v200/2d1540b3-5d2c-4088-a408-0fe22276c98b) ](https://images.spot.im/image/upload/v200/2d1540b3-5d2c-4088-a408-0fe22276c98b) ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2025, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7109 "2025-12-28T22:00:00Z")
**Air Force One crashed in the middle of rural America.** Panic stricken, the Secret Service mobilized and descended on the farm in force. When they got there, the wreckage was clear. The aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hulk left smoldering in a tree line that bordered a farm. Secret Service descended upon the smoking hulk but could find no remains of the crew or the President’s staff. To their amazement, a lone farmer was plowing a field not too far away as if nothing at all happened. They hurried over to surround the man’s tractor. “Sir,” the senior Secret Service agent asked, panting and out of breath. “Did you see this terrible accident happen?” “Yep. Sure did.” The man muttered unconcernedly. “Do you realize that is the President of the United States airplane?” “Yep.” “Were there any survivors?” the agent gasped. “Nope. They’s all kilt straight out.” The farmer sighed cutting off his tractor motor. “I done buried them all myself. Took most of the morning.” “The President of the United States is dead?” The agent gulped in disbelief. “Well,” the farmer sighed, obviously wanting to get back to his work. “He kept a-saying he wasn’t … but you know what a liar he is.” ---
**Author:** ![smithsb](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/smithsb/32/12107_2.png) [@smithsb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/smithsb)\ **Post date:** [December 28, 2025, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7110 "2025-12-28T22:46:26Z")
That one wins the day 👍 ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [December 30, 2025, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/7111 "2025-12-30T17:16:09Z")
Russian dolls are just so full of themselves. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629.md?page=354) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629.md?page=356)