# More Jokes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Tags:** comedian-jokes\ **Created:** [February 27, 2020, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629 "2020-02-27T23:57:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 71
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1412 "2022-02-08T03:14:07Z")
Does the grapist still post here? ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1413 "2022-02-08T10:47:00Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > No drape jokes! I snortled. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Duality](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mr.duality/32/4098_2.png) [@Mr.Duality](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Duality)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1414 "2022-02-08T11:35:43Z")
Want to know what’s really true about us guys who have big feet? We pay more for shoes. ---
**Author:** ![JKellyMap](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jkellymap/32/15880_2.png) [@JKellyMap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JKellyMap)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1415 "2022-02-08T12:30:10Z")
> [@Askance](#): > > No drape jokes! > > ('sok, I’ll see myself out) No, please stay! That was brilliant. (I enjoyed the original “pull yourself together” joke as well.) ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1416 "2022-02-08T13:20:34Z")
I got overtaken by some guy on a Yamaha DGX500 this morning. I wouldn’t mind - but that’s an electric piano. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1417 "2022-02-08T14:24:51Z")
Jacob Rees-Mogg has become the minister for Brexit opportunities and government efficiency, as Boris Johnson carries out a cabinet reshuffle ! ---
**Author:** ![a6ka97](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c2a13f/32.png) [@a6ka97](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a6ka97)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1418 "2022-02-08T14:56:21Z")
A start up motorcycle company introduced a model that runs on laughing gas. It is called the Yamaha-ha-ha. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1419 "2022-02-08T15:13:14Z")
### Q: Why did the can crusher quit his job? A: Because it was soda pressing. * * * ### Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may. * * * ### If you ever get cold, just stand in the corner of a room for a while. They’re normally around 90 degrees. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1420 "2022-02-08T16:28:08Z")
> [@pjd](#): > > Jacob Rees-Mogg has become the minister for Brexit opportunities and government efficiency, as Boris Johnson carries out a cabinet reshuffle ! I don’t get it. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1421 "2022-02-08T17:14:55Z")
Yeah, me neither. (But imma tell some of these puns at work next shift! Looking forward to the rolleyes.) ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1422 "2022-02-08T17:48:48Z")
I suppose pjd is referring to this: > **[Jacob Rees-Mogg made Brexit opportunities minister as PM reshuffles team](https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-60305006)** > > Ex-Chief Whip Mark Spencer becomes Commons leader, as Boris Johnson seeks to shore up MPs' support. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1423 "2022-02-08T18:11:09Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > I don’t get it. Seeing **Knowed\_out’s** link, I’d guess that someone just posted in the wrong thread somehow. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1424 "2022-02-08T18:11:51Z")
Boris Johnson is a bit of a punchline, so it’s hard to tell/ ---
**Author:** ![CardboardBoxx](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardboardboxx/32/7079_2.png) [@CardboardBoxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CardboardBoxx)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1425 "2022-02-08T18:14:20Z")
I think the “joke” is supposed to be pjd’s opinion on J R-Ms ability to be efficient, or the whole idea of “Brexit opportunities”. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1426 "2022-02-08T18:53:53Z")
> [@pjd](#): > > Jacob Rees-Mogg has become the minister for Brexit opportunities and government efficiency, as Boris Johnson carries out a cabinet reshuffle ! It’s a joke, but not a “ha ha” one. The comment I’ve seen is that being Minister for Brexit Opportunities is a perfect use of JRM’s talents because there aren’t any…and there aren’t any. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1427 "2022-02-08T19:07:32Z")
This. I expect he’s got a book to write. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1428 "2022-02-08T21:02:53Z")
Mr. Carlin steps out of the elevator for his weekly appointment with Dr. Hartley, and says to Carol… Oh, sorry. No Therapist Jokes. ---
**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\ **Post date:** [February 8, 2022, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1429 "2022-02-08T23:11:56Z")
👏 👏 👏 ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2022, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1430 "2022-02-09T04:10:10Z")
I was expecting a Warning ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2022, 1:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629/1431 "2022-02-09T13:43:50Z")
## Rita Rudner Jokes Before I met my husband, I’d never fallen in love. I’d stepped in it a few times. * * * I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them. * * * I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet. * * * I got kicked out of ballet class because I pulled a groin muscle. It wasn’t mine. * * * I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629.md?page=70) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/more-jokes/848629.md?page=72)