# Moronic Cops **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 23, 2009, 10:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444 "2009-03-23T10:03:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/41 "2009-03-24T13:39:15Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > Yes, well… there are _homini_ and then there are _homini_, Your Honor… Or in this case, _Homini homini doofus_. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/42 "2009-03-24T14:54:26Z")
> [@Lars\_Aruns](#): > > That’s an _[ad hominem](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ad_hominem)_ attack. Having more issues than any popular magazine doesn’t mean that policemen can stop him at their whim - supposing, of course, that the story is true. If things happened as he described, and I cannot tell, the cop could have thought something was iffy and wanted to have a look at **Stan Shmenge** , ok, but still… The OP may be a bother/a troll/a whiner or whatever (I cannot honestly say), but should it affect your view of the situation? All of the OP’s encounters witht he Po-po have one thing in common. Based on his posting record, I would be willing to bet that he challenged the cop at every turn. That would turn even the most level-headed, reasonable cop into a dick pretty quickly. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/43 "2009-03-24T15:18:38Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > “Well, we pulled you over because your plate came back as a convertable.” > > My ass. They didn’t have time to run my plate. Just out of curiousity, if they had had time, would it have come back as a convertable? ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/44 "2009-03-24T15:28:05Z")
> [@Lanzy](#): > > It was a while back and I have consulted my better half, she says I got it wrong. > > Turn Red While UNDER the light, ticket for running yellow. > Turn red before passing the light, ticket for running red. That makes more sense—thanks! ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/45 "2009-03-24T18:42:48Z")
The couple of times I’ve been pulled over, both erroneously, the exchange has gone like this: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: No, sir (or ma’am). While I will gladly and promptly provide my ID, insurance information and registration I will not answer any further questions or make any statement, nor will I consent to a search of the vehicle without a warrant. If you are pulling me over for suspected DUI, I will not consent to field sobriety tests, although I will provide breath or blood samples as required by law. Be aware that I will be demanding a second, independent blood test for refutation, as is my right under the law. Both times they’ve run my info to make sure it was valid / current and sent me on my way. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/46 "2009-03-24T19:10:36Z")
I would tend towards saving the paragraph in the middle until the cop actually asks me something, you know, pertinent. 🙂 I say that because, although I don’t know you, saying that might make you sound like an ass, and cops have little tolerance for that kind of thing. Simple, polite “yes & no” answers and respectful questions go a long, long way. I know my rights- I just don’t use them as a clue-by-four to smack cops with. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/47 "2009-03-24T19:23:57Z")
> [@Lars\_Aruns](#): > > That’s an _[ad hominem](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ad_hominem)_ attack. What do you think this is, a debate? ---
**Author:** ![Jester](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jester/32/8223_2.png) [@Jester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jester)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/48 "2009-03-24T21:19:57Z")
> [@FallenAngel](#): > > The couple of times I’ve been pulled over, both erroneously, the exchange has gone like this: > > Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? > > Me: No, sir (or ma’am). While I will gladly and promptly provide my ID, insurance information and registration I will not answer any further questions or make any statement, nor will I consent to a search of the vehicle without a warrant. If you are pulling me over for suspected DUI, I will not consent to field sobriety tests, although I will provide breath or blood samples as required by law. Be aware that I will be demanding a second, independent blood test for refutation, as is my right under the law. > > Both times they’ve run my info to make sure it was valid / current and sent me on my way. You must be a blast at parties. ---
**Author:** ![CannyDan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cannydan/32/548_2.png) [@CannyDan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CannyDan)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/49 "2009-03-24T22:41:21Z")
Once while driving through Alabama at about 3:00 AM, a state patrol officer pulled over my Volkswagen bus. This being 1970 and my hair being rather long, we went immediately into the \*pro forma \*“Outta there, up against the car, spread em!” that was routine at the time. My polite “What seems to be the problem, Officer?” was answered with “Busted tail light.” I began to object “Well, it was fine 20 miles back when I stopped for gas…”. My comment was interrupted by his baton going SMASH on my left tail light, and his statement that “This one ain’t workin now…”. The rest of the night was not any better. Having certain rights, and knowing your rights, does not always equal having those rights accorded to you. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/50 "2009-03-24T23:09:38Z")
> [@Mollie\_Magill](#): > > All of the OP’s encounters witht he Po-po have one thing in common. Assuming any of them actually happened as stated, if at all. Those other two threads seem mighty implausible. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2009, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/51 "2009-03-24T23:38:40Z")
> [@CannyDan](#): > > I began to object “Well, it was fine 20 miles back when I stopped for gas…”. My comment was interrupted by his baton going SMASH on my left tail light, and his statement that “This one ain’t workin now…”. > > The rest of the night was not any better. By any chance did you also go on a canoe trip with a few friends, where you encountered a couple of eccentric locals who complimented you on your facial features and skill at doing animal impressions? ---
**Author:** ![CannyDan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cannydan/32/548_2.png) [@CannyDan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CannyDan)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/52 "2009-03-25T13:50:23Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > By any chance did you also go on a canoe trip with a few friends, where you encountered a couple of eccentric locals who complimented you on your facial features and skill at doing animal impressions? Interesting you should say that. Some time around there (strangely fuzzy memories of that whole period of my life) a buddy and I canoed the Chattooga River. Not rafted, mind you. Aluminum double ended canoe. Class IV+ rapids and all. Somehow (well, partly due to our foresight in bringing a gallon of epoxy bonding resin for field repairs, and partly due to some spectacular good luck) we made it through with the canoe still afloat (barely), one and a half paddles between us, and even a scrap of one of our sleeping bags. Oh, and the clothes on our backs. Some of which had hardly any holes in them! The Chattooga was later used as the site for the movie’s ficticious river. But we never heard banjos the whole time we were there. ---
**Author:** ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/53 "2009-03-25T14:00:08Z")
Reminds me of an incident a few years back. I was after a nice day of spring skiing, had a beer at the local pub, and was on my way home on a deserted highway. I had the radio cranked up and was groovin to the tunes…then, I saw the blue lights behind me! I pulled over and got out my license and registration. The state cope come over: (Me) “Good evening officer, what’s the problem?” (Cop): " I’ve been following you for 3 miles, do you realize you have a burned out tailight?" (Me): “Sorry office, No, I’ll have it fixed on Monday” (Cop): “Ok, be sure to take care of it” (Me) : “Thanks officer” What a maroon! Following for 3 miles?? Still, at least the guy wasn’t a prick about it. ---
**Author:** ![SteveG1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bb73d2/32.png) [@SteveG1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SteveG1)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/54 "2009-03-25T15:28:56Z")
> [@ralph124c](#): > > Reminds me of an incident a few years back. … What a maroon! Following for 3 miles?? Still, at least the guy wasn’t a prick about it. A stalker! Run away! Run away! ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/55 "2009-03-25T15:39:09Z")
You know, that’s the one nice thing about modern cars. Someone tries the baton thing, it’s a good chance the light’ll survive, and an even chance they’ll nail themselves with the bounceback. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/56 "2009-03-25T17:55:53Z")
> [@ralph124c](#): > > The state cope come over: > (Me) “Good evening officer, what’s the problem?” > (Cop): " I’ve been following you for 3 miles, do you realize you have a burned out tailight?" > (Me): “Sorry office, No, I’ll have it fixed on Monday” > (Cop): “Ok, be sure to take care of it” > (Me) : “Thanks officer” > What a maroon! Following for 3 miles?? Still, at least the guy wasn’t a prick about it. Not a maroon- he just wanted to check out your driving for a bit, then talk to you for a second and see how you responded. You seemed fine and not belligerent, so off you went. ---
**Author:** ![buttonjockey308](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bcef8e/32.png) [@buttonjockey308](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buttonjockey308)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/57 "2009-03-25T20:29:19Z")
> [@EJsGirl](#): > > Not a maroon- he just wanted to check out your driving for a bit, then talk to you for a second and see how you responded. You seemed fine and not belligerent, so off you went. Bingo. Thing is, most cops don’t even WANT to hassle you. Hell, most of 'em don’t even want to get out of their cars and put themselves in a potentially life threatening situation unless they HAVE to to deal with some true problem. Your busted taillight or object hanging form your rearview mirror or expired plates etc. are all just probable cause. That’s the reason, generally speaking, why many arrests for warrants, drugs, guns etc happen. If the bad guys all drove earth tone sedans in good working order with insurance, up to date registration, factory equipment and minus the accoutrement, there would be a lot fewer hassles. Everything snowballs, say you’re a bad guy, you drive an 89 Caprice, painted like a rolling metallic froot loop with 24" wheels and lo-pro tires, you also have an air freshener hanging from your rearview, I check your plate, the owner of the car is suspended, I pull you over, in talking to you, I uncover a reason to search your car or you let me. I find enough weed in little baggies to take you to lockup. While in lockup getting processed, I flip you to buy from your dealer, as local cops we chase the chain of sellers up to the point we need either county, state or DEA involvement. None of this happens if the 89 caprice is a 95 stock Volvo and nobody’s suspended and you are properly insured and don’t drive like a dick. That almost never happens and 8 times from 10 the bloke you’re pulling over is on the order of Stanley over there who goes from 0-dick in 2.5 seconds. There ARE bad cops out there, but they’re not all on the take or trying to ‘get’ you for no reason at all. If the force is properly managed and led, they’ve got enough to do. ---
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2009, 11:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/58 "2009-03-25T23:42:40Z")
> [@Jester](#): > > You must be a blast at parties. As long as the party isn’t filled with badge heavy jerks who normally get away with harassment with impunity, yeah, I am. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2009, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/59 "2009-03-26T01:13:34Z")
That is the attitude that gets you harassed. It’s called “confirmation bias.” You treat them like assholes from the get-go, and that’s what you get in return. And yes, I do mean you. Based on your earlier post, at least. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2009, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/60 "2009-03-26T04:31:36Z")
Hey, Buttonjockey, what happens if you try to smash a taillight on a modern car? Got something you can try it on? Betcha it doesn’t work so well. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444.md?page=4)