# Moronic Cops **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 23, 2009, 10:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444 "2009-03-23T10:03:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 9
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/161 "2009-04-15T19:26:46Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > Is that before or after your admission of frequent drunken driving is made public? Please. Message Board Warriors like **Stan** never say a peep in public. I very much doubt any of his so called “confrontations” have taken place. It’s all just angry fantasy masturbation. ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/162 "2009-04-15T19:29:22Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > One wonders why you’re working so hard to impress us with your tales of sticking it to the state patrol. I am not trying to impress. The facts are as they are. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/163 "2009-04-15T19:29:44Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > I am a participant in a message board. I speak the truth. Except for that probable cause thing. > [@](#): > > It is you all that seem so agitated. I’d say I’m bemused. But that’s easy for me to say- I don’t drive much these days, so I don’t have to watch out for the gestapo. ---
**Author:** ![Hampshire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hampshire/32/4887_2.png) [@Hampshire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hampshire)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/164 "2009-04-15T19:30:31Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > And quite frankly, Hampshire, if you are a cop, which I doubt, if you spend all your time pulling over guys with beards in vans, and think that this person is abducting small children or selling drugs, you are a pure asshat. The world would be better off without your knuckle dragging type. In my community, I am trusted with kids, don’t sell drugs, and have a good standing in my community. If you were to try and arrest me, based on your idiotic prejudices, you would face an army of my friends and neighbors, and you would be made a fool of in any court of law. So eat my dick, douchebag. Aw, I’m just messin’ with ya Schmenge. Everyones got their undies in a bunch in this thread I was trying to lighten the mood. I’m no cop but I do appreciate the job most of them do however I will admit some let their ego overwhelm their badge from time to time. I was once pulled over in the middle of the night cause a cop was haulin ass down an empty street, didn’t see me driving there doing the speed limit, almost hit me, then pulled me over accussing me of cutting him off. I was on my way home from the hospital after visiting my wife and sick child and was running on a couple hours sleep and looked dissheveled and explained this to him. He still continued to badger me about drinking that night even after I showed him my visitors wristband with the hospitals name on it. So yeah, he was a total fuckhead in that moment but who knows what trash’s house he just came from after answering a domestic disturbance call for the 20th time that night. I’ll cut him some slack. ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/165 "2009-04-15T19:30:51Z")
> [@Dante](#): > > Please. Message Board Warriors like **Stan** never say a peep in public. I very much doubt any of his so called “confrontations” have taken place. It’s all just angry fantasy masturbation. Censor things that make me uncomfortable! ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/166 "2009-04-15T19:33:05Z")
> [@Dante](#): > > Please. Message Board Warriors like **Stan** never say a peep in public. I very much doubt any of his so called “confrontations” have taken place. It’s all just angry fantasy masturbation. That’s actually a very good point. I really can see Stan sitting there mute while the officer gives him a tongue lashing, then coming in here claiming he accused the cop of drunken driving, and left him “limp and dickless” on the side of the road. ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/167 "2009-04-15T19:36:04Z")
> [@Hampshire](#): > > Aw, I’m just messin’ with ya Schmenge. Everyones got their undies in a bunch in this thread I was trying to lighten the mood. I’m no cop but I do appreciate the job most of them do however I will admit some let their ego overwhelm their badge from time to time. I was once pulled over in the middle of the night cause a cop was haulin ass down an empty street, didn’t see me driving there doing the speed limit, almost hit me, then pulled me over accussing me of cutting him off. > I was on my way home from the hospital after visiting my wife and sick child and was running on a couple hours sleep and looked dissheveled and explained this to him. He still continued to badger me about drinking that night even after I showed him my visitors wristband with the hospitals name on it. So yeah, he was a total fuckhead in that moment but who knows what trash’s house he just came from after answering a domestic disturbance call for the 20th time that night. I’ll cut him some slack. And I will always say that many cops are good peeps. It is a tough job, that I would not personally want to do. The folks I know that do it have a lot of baggage to carry. But a lot of them are just pure dicks, and everyone knows it, the posters here know it. They just want to subscribe to a fantasy that all cops are knights in shining armor and nothing could be further from the truth. As a society, we must seek to recruit and demand the best among us for this difficult and demanding job. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/168 "2009-04-15T19:38:19Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > Yes, the cops think I drive like shit. Notice they DIDN’T cite me? > > As far as jury duty, I am just being honest. If the system was fair, they might consider a person that doesn’t trust the cops with jury duty. Good luck with that. > > **The moronicity in this thread is disturbing.** I think we all agree on this. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/169 "2009-04-15T19:39:02Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > That’s actually a very good point. I really can see Stan sitting there mute while the officer gives him a tongue lashing, then coming in here claiming he accused the cop of drunken driving, and left him “limp and dickless” on the side of the road. You are as wrong as wrong can be. I do not enjoy these exchanges that I have related. It sickens me that BURBANK POLICE will lie in your face. I would not be posting this crap if it didn’t happen. But live in your dream world. All cops are honest! Really they are! I don’t know what I was thinking to suggest otherwise. OBEY! ---
**Author:** ![Dante](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dante/32/9673_2.png) [@Dante](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dante)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/170 "2009-04-15T19:39:25Z")
> [@Cheesesteak](#): > > That’s actually a very good point. I really can see Stan sitting there mute while the officer gives him a tongue lashing, then coming in here claiming he accused the cop of drunken driving, and left him “limp and dickless” on the side of the road. That’s usually the way it goes. At least he has some entertainment value to us, if not to the cop. During the traffic stop (if they actually happen) he probably just sits there like a chicken watching a card trick. Then gets all het up here at the SDMB. ---
**Author:** ![pantheon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/6bbea6/32.png) [@pantheon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pantheon)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/171 "2009-04-15T19:41:32Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > If you were to try and arrest me, based on your idiotic prejudices, you would face an army of my friends and neighbors, and you would be made a fool of in any court of law. Ha ha! You didn’t count on my loyal army of prostitutes, did you? ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/172 "2009-04-15T19:52:16Z")
> [@Dante](#): > > That’s usually the way it goes. At least he has some entertainment value to us, if not to the cop. During the traffic stop (if they actually happen) he probably just sits there like a chicken watching a card trick. Then gets all het up here at the SDMB. What is scary to me is that apparently there are a lot of people on the board, supposedly smart people, opinion makers, that believe that our current gendarme are a bunch of honest people, and that the laws they enforce are logical and just, and then these idiots go out and vote. Scary. Stand up for your rights. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/173 "2009-04-15T19:57:24Z")
::walks by, pushing a broom:: Don’t mind me. _Some_body’s not packing their strawmen very well. ---
**Author:** ![Cheesesteak](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheesesteak/32/3694_2.png) [@Cheesesteak](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cheesesteak)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/174 "2009-04-15T19:57:49Z")
> [@Dante](#): > > he probably just sits there like a chicken watching a card trick. Great image! ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/175 "2009-04-15T19:58:47Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > ::walks by, pushing a broom:: > > Don’t mind me. _Some_body’s not packing their strawmen very well. How about posing an argument, broom pusher? ---
**Author:** ![Stan\_Shmenge](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/94ad74/32.png) [@Stan\_Shmenge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stan_Shmenge)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/176 "2009-04-15T20:01:50Z")
> [@Lute Skywatcher](#): > > ::walks by, pushing a broom:: > > Don’t mind me. _Some_body’s not packing their strawmen very well. Ad-hominem is the last resort of the fool. ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/177 "2009-04-15T20:05:15Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > And just to piss everybody on this wussy board off, I have driven more miles drunk off my ass than any of you pussies have sober. I have been pulled over by coppers when I was drunk off my ass and they didn’t have shit to say. I am a better driver than you, under any circumstances! Get a life, and this goes double for mods. Hello, fool. ---
**Author:** ![UncaStuart](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uncastuart/32/404_2.png) [@UncaStuart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncaStuart)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/178 "2009-04-15T20:12:15Z")
> [@Zeriel](#): > > In closing, eat me and go to jury duty, you whining slacker, after you thank a cop for putting his ass on the line for your lazy ass. Let me just say I hope that he \*doesn’t \*ever go to jury duty. I was on a jury where a burn specialist and a physiologist testified that the 3rd degree burns to the 18 month old child could not have happened the way the mother told the story–that the child’s hand had to have been held and pressed against the iron to produce the shape and severity. But there was one juror who scoffed about “pointy-headed experts” and how he would never take their word for anything. The eleven other jurors spent two days talking with him, but he was adamant and we eventually had to settle for a lesser charge. If I were hoping for justice in some case, I’d perfer to see reasonable people on the jury. ---
**Author:** ![Mollie\_Magill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mollie_magill/32/20882_2.png) [@Mollie\_Magill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mollie_Magill)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/179 "2009-04-15T20:14:27Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > You are as wrong as wrong can be. I do not enjoy these exchanges that I have related. It sickens me that BURBANK POLICE will lie in your face. I would not be posting this crap if it didn’t happen. But live in your dream world. All cops are honest! Really they are! I don’t know what I was thinking to suggest otherwise. OBEY! One thing that confuses me. If the cop is lying to pull you over, why not continue the lie and just give you a ticket? ---
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444/180 "2009-04-15T20:14:28Z")
> [@Stan\_Shmenge](#): > > What is scary to me is that apparently there are a lot of people on the board, supposedly smart people, opinion makers, that believe that our current gendarme are a bunch of honest people, and that the laws they enforce are logical and just, and then these idiots go out and vote. Scary. > > Stand up for your rights. Serious response: Hmm, 99% of the cops I’ve personally known have been decent human beings working hard at a hard job, every interaction I’ve had with a cop has been aboveboard and caused me no grief or problems whatsoever–BUT SOME GUY ON A MESSAGEBOARD, an admitted drunk driver and proven liar (see also “slightly running the stop sign” vs. “I never ran a stop sign”) tells me all cops are pigs and expects me to roll over and just act on his supposed, unconfirmed experience? And WE’RE the idiots for ignoring your hype? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444.md?page=8) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/moronic-cops/490444.md?page=10)