# Most annoying and/or insipid song lyrics? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 16, 2003, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172 "2003-06-16T07:16:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Ms2001](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ms2001/32/18463_2.png) [@Ms2001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms2001)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/41 "2003-06-17T01:58:22Z")
Fatboy Slim - _Fucking in Heaven_: “Fatboy Slim is fucking in heaven Fatboy Slim is fucking in heaven Fatboy Slim is fucking in heaven Fucking and fucking and fucking in heaven” Prodigy - _Smack My Bitch Up_: “Change my pitch up Smack my bitch up Change my pitch up Smack my bitch up” OK, those were cheap shots. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/42 "2003-06-17T02:22:36Z")
> [@](#): > > Hmmm, I probably should have known that, but I didn’t. It’s still …uh…insipid, although I’d be willing to bet the original is much less so. Maybe you’d find the song less insipid, but I’m pretty sure the words are the same. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/45deac/32.png) [@Evil\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_One)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/43 "2003-06-17T02:25:04Z")
Muskrat Love. Captain and Tenielle. This is about all I can remember. Thank god. “Muskrat Susie, Muskrat Sam Do the jitterbug in muskrat land And they wiggle Sue starts to giggle.” Retch. ---
**Author:** ![Murcielago](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/da6949/32.png) [@Murcielago](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Murcielago)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/44 "2003-06-17T02:39:12Z")
No question McCartney has sappiness issues, but don’t forget about John’s “Dear Yoko”: _Oh Yoko I’m never, ever, ever, ever, ever gonna let you go Oh Yoko I’m never, ever, ever, ever, ever gonna let you go_ On second thought, **do** forget about John’s “Dear Yoko,” then let me how you did it. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/45 "2003-06-17T12:23:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by koeeoaddi \* > \*\*I keep telling y’all, this is the worst song ever recorded with he worst lyrics ever written: > > _Gotta have a drink of water and a story read > A teddybear named Fred, that’s my boy > What’s that you say momma, come on and keep your feet warm? > Well save me a place I’ll be there in a minute or so > I think I’ll stay right here > And say a little prayer before I go > Me and God are watching Scotty grow > Me and God are watching Scotty grow_ > > Bobby Goldsboro, of course (where is that vomit smilie when you need it). \*\* Giving credit where it’s due: Mac Davis wrote it, about his son Scotty. Goldsboro just happens to sing insipid songs. ---
**Author:** ![Alcibiades](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/cab0a1/32.png) [@Alcibiades](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alcibiades)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 12:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/46 "2003-06-17T12:32:38Z")
I really like Soundgarden’s music, but damned if their lyrics make any sense, grammatically or otherwise. ---
**Author:** ![Kyomara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8edcca/32.png) [@Kyomara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kyomara)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/47 "2003-06-17T13:05:02Z")
She’s a brick and I’m drowning slowly Off the coast, and I’m headed nowhere. And I second _From a Distance_, the basic message of which is “Oh, baby, it’s not that God doesn’t care about us, it’s just that…well…he’s _nearsighted_ is all.” ---
**Author:** ![mallocks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f4b2a3/32.png) [@mallocks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mallocks)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/48 "2003-06-17T13:44:08Z")
**Terrifel** , priceless, you should get some sorta award for that 🙂 **Mr2001** , it’s “chance my pitch up” I’m practically sure. Now bow down and worship the track as the visionary masterpiece it is. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/49 "2003-06-17T14:11:31Z")
**Terrifel** , I think the last decade of Ms. Houston’s life has pretty much taken away her dignity, no outside help required. 😉 Here’s my sorry contribution: _Pilot of the Airwaves Here is my request. You don’t have to play it but I hope you do your best. I’ve been listening to your show on the radio, And you seem like a friend to me._ ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/50 "2003-06-17T14:21:42Z")
Not that I’m disagreeing or nothin’, but aren’t you kinda shootin fish in a barrel? Lets make it harder: Give me pop lyrics that _aren’t_ insipid ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/51 "2003-06-17T15:14:36Z")
> [@](#): > > ABBA needs a separate thread for their sometimes insipid lyrics. Well, yes, but you have to give them some credit considering English is their second language. We have people who have (presumably) been speaking English their entire lives who have turned out much worse: “The Girl is Mine” by Michael Jackson and Paul McCartney is one shining example. I picture “the girl” running off in horror while the two men duke it out in the most testosterone-deprived battle you’ll ever witness. (“No, man, she’s mine.” “I beg to differ with you, my friend. She’s mine.”) Makes me yearn for the days when men were fighters not lovers. Just ONE sucker punch and the song could mercifully be over. ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2003, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/52 "2003-06-17T16:56:46Z")
I nominate Bill Lovelady’s only hit, the godawful **One more reggae for the road** , for it’s terrible, terrible rhymes: _She came from Madrid, just a crazy kid Met her down in Cadiz Think you know where that is_ And: _I was sprawled across the table And making love to a Spanish Betty Garble_ It hurts my fingers copy+pasting it. ---
**Author:** ![Ms2001](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ms2001/32/18463_2.png) [@Ms2001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms2001)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/53 "2003-06-18T00:14:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by mallocks \* > \*\ ***Mr2001** , it’s “chance my pitch up” I’m practically sure. Now bow down and worship the track as the visionary masterpiece it is. \*\* Google hits for “change my pitch up”: 511 Google hits for “chance my pitch up”: 0 Neither line really makes sense in context (what there is of it), but I can at least imagine “change my pitch up” referring to a telemarketer altering his script, or getting kicked in the groin. What would chancing one’s pitch up entail? ---
**Author:** ![Duke](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e8c25b/32.png) [@Duke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duke)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2003, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/54 "2003-06-18T01:53:37Z")
Surely a contender has to be that early-90s “song” by 2 Unlimited (2 Untalented?), “No Limit.” A representative sample of the lyrics: “No no, no no no no, no no no no, no no there’s no limit!” “Techno techno techno techno!” And the damn song was **everywhere** in England in late '92. Made you want to scoop out your brains with a spoon. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2003, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/55 "2003-06-27T11:31:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Marley23 \* > \*\*If there’s a King of insipidness, I think it has to be McCartney. \*\* \*Wo wo wo wo Wo wo wo wo My love does it good With a little luck, we can lay it down. Can’t you feel the town (time?) exploding?.. The willow turns his back on inclement weather; And if he can do it, we can do it, just me and you Maybe I’m amazed at the way you pulled me out in time And hung me on the line Bip bop, bip bip bop Bip bop, bip bip band\* That’s about all I can take. ---
**Author:** ![And\_that\_s\_the\_bottom\_line](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/df788c/32.png) [@And\_that\_s\_the\_bottom\_line](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/And_that_s_the_bottom_line)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2003, 11:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/56 "2003-06-27T11:51:05Z")
Avril Lavigne’s lyrics to **Sk8ter Boi** has got to be some of the most insipid annoying lyrics ever created. Also, Justin Timberlake’s **Gone** has some really annoying simplistic lyrics. ---
**Author:** ![SolGrundy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbce88/32.png) [@SolGrundy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SolGrundy)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2003, 12:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/57 "2003-06-27T12:26:53Z")
> [@](#): > > The time to hesitate is through > No time to wallow in the mire > Try now we can only lose > And our love become a funeral pyre > Come on baby light my fire > Try to set the night on fire Or, for that matter, _any_ lyrics by Jim Morrison. I hate to beat up on a dead guy, but boy did he ever suck. And it seemed like every third dorm room when I was going to college had a poster of Morrison with the caption “AMERICAN POET.” Hmmm, well I guess you do have to give him credit for being able to rhyme “fire” with “fire.” > [@](#): > > Hello, I love you, won’t you tell me your name? > Hello, I love you, let me jump in your game. Look out, Maya Angelou! ---
**Author:** ![Winston\_Bongo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a9adbd/32.png) [@Winston\_Bongo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Winston_Bongo)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2003, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/58 "2003-06-27T12:30:59Z")
It’s amazing that we’ve gotten this far without mention of Neil Diamond’s abomination, **I Am I Said** , the most famous lines of which are: _I am I said To no one there. And no one heard at all Not even the chair._ These are considered by many to be the worst lines ever composed in the English language. Yet I humbly propose that another part of the same song is even **worse**. I submit: \*Did you ever read about a frog who dreamed of bein’ a king And then became one? Well except for the names and a few other changes I you talk about me, the story’s the same one. \* So you see, except for the part about being a frog and becoming a king, that’s Neil all the way. This is similar to how the story of my life is exactly like that of Abraham Lincoln, who grew up in a log cabin and became President of the United States . . . except for the part about the log cabin, becoming President, and being named “Abraham Lincoln.” ---
**Author:** ![serenitynow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@serenitynow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/serenitynow)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2003, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/59 "2003-07-05T05:08:32Z")
Of course, there is always the classic by WHAM! I’m never gonna dance again. Guilty feet have got no rhythm. Kind of makes you wonder where this guy’s feet have been. ---
**Author:** ![RikWriter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/49beb7/32.png) [@RikWriter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RikWriter)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2003, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172/60 "2003-07-05T12:08:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Winston Bongo \* > \*\*It’s amazing that we’ve gotten this far without mention of Neil Diamond’s abomination, **I Am I Said** , the most famous lines of which are: > > _I am I said > To no one there. > And no one heard at all > Not even the chair._ > > These are considered by many to be the worst lines ever composed in the English language. Yet I humbly propose that another part of the same song is even **worse**. I submit: > > \*Did you ever read about a frog who dreamed of bein’ a king > And then became one? > Well except for the names and a few other changes > I you talk about me, the story’s the same one. > \* > So you see, except for the part about being a frog and becoming a king, that’s Neil all the way. This is similar to how the story of my life is exactly like that of Abraham Lincoln, who grew up in a log cabin and became President of the United States . . . except for the part about the log cabin, becoming President, and being named “Abraham Lincoln.” \*\* I mentioned this song under the “worst song ever recorded” thread. Didn’t want to be redundant. But yes, those lyrics are just horrible. Another one to think about is Bob Seager’s “Blame it on Midnight.” Particularly the timelessly horrible line: “Until you’ve been beside a man, you don’t know who he knows.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-annoying-and-or-insipid-song-lyrics/182172.md?page=4)