# Most complicated drink possible at Starbucks **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [February 23, 2005, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561 "2005-02-23T17:56:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Vreemdeling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/7ea924/32.png) [@Vreemdeling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vreemdeling)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2005, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/61 "2005-03-01T21:14:02Z")
I do drink Starbuck’s once in a very blue moon. I stopped drinking cafeine because of ulcers a long time ago. I am also not great with dairy, so I drink soy milk. I don’t order my decaf soly iced latte anymore. I now call it the triple fake. Has anyone else found shortcuts for long names? ---
**Author:** ![Vreemdeling](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/7ea924/32.png) [@Vreemdeling](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vreemdeling)\ **Post date:** [March 1, 2005, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/62 "2005-03-01T21:22:40Z")
I do drink Starbuck’s once in a very blue moon. I stopped drinking cafeine because of ulcers a long time ago. I am also not great with dairy, so I drink soy milk. I don’t order my decaf soly iced latte anymore. I now call it the triple fake. When I order a triple fake I either get a blank stare (90%), or someone who tries to figure it out. I think they should put it on the menu as a shortcut. Has anyone else found shortcuts for long names? (I know, I am hijacking the thread just a tiny little here, but any description would ahve to include a long name as well…) ---
**Author:** ![bdgr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a87d85/32.png) [@bdgr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bdgr)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/63 "2005-03-02T03:19:52Z")
> [@audiobottle](#): > > A shot is just a shot of espresso. At Starbucks, or at least the one by me, they’re pre-made, so they just push a button, thus taking any of the skill out of it. Most places they take the espresso bean, calculate the humidity, the temperature, the number of times you’ve glanced at the beans since taking them out of the bag, do a small dance, sacrifice some customers, grind them in the right amount, compact it just enough, and then run very hot water through it until you get the perfect espresso shot. Sort of… not only the above, but you don’t just run hot water through it, you force it at 9 atmospheres of preassure. There are elements of coffee that only mix with water under preassure. A perfect shot is extracted in exactly 27 seconds. much faster than that, its sour, much slower than that, it’s bitter. \*$'s does theirs in 20 because apparently their goal is to make the shot taste like bong water…but they arent premade, they just use a super-auto machine that grinds, tamps, pulls the shot, then reloads all on its own. It does take the art out of it. A real honset to god Barista is not a min wage junkie…I wish I could pay my employees min wage…It is a skilled trade with a guild and everything. There are international competitions (I kid you not) and schools for it. We generally make fun of our customers who slip up and order using \*$'s terms by the way…(the ones with a sense of humor anyway) ---
**Author:** ![Fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/bc8723/32.png) [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 8:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/64 "2005-03-02T08:50:39Z")
> [@Tierce](#): > > Lars: I don’t know about you, Lance, but I like my coffee like I like my women: HOT! > Lance: So do I – cold, pretentious, and in glasses. I cannot help but recall of a stand-up comic I once heard tell of. His line: “I like my coffee the way I like my women: with big tits.” ---
**Author:** ![unclviny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e274bd/32.png) [@unclviny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/unclviny)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 8:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/65 "2005-03-02T08:53:44Z")
We’ve been threadspotted!, how’s my hair? Unclviny ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 2:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/66 "2005-03-02T14:14:32Z")
> [@unclviny](#): > > We’ve been threadspotted!, how’s my hair? > > Unclviny ::Looks at the floor:: Looks…okay…to me… :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Unintentionally\_Blank](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/unintentionally_blank/32/5418_2.png) [@Unintentionally\_Blank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Unintentionally_Blank)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/67 "2005-03-02T16:44:53Z")
> [@Tierce](#): > > From The Fusco Brothers: > > Lars: Black coffee, please. > Lance: Iced cappuccino for me. > Lars: I don’t know about you, Lance, but I like my coffee like I like my women: HOT! > Lance: So do I – cold, pretentious, and in glasses. > > 😃 Also: I like my coffee like I like my women: a1: Black, thin, and bitter. a2: ground up and in the freezer ---
**Author:** ![PatriotX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@PatriotX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatriotX)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/68 "2005-03-02T17:13:11Z")
[Let’s play “I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Men/Women!”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=189852) I agree w/ **bdgr** I’ve spent many a day figuring out how to _consistently and repeatedly_ get exactly what I want out of my coffee preparation methods. I have systems (each slightly unorthodox) for my ibrik, french press, and stove top espresso. I measure everything and am not afraid to use an electronic timer. Make fun of me if you wish, but I really enjoy _my_ coffee. ---
**Author:** ![bdgr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a87d85/32.png) [@bdgr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bdgr)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/69 "2005-03-02T18:01:37Z")
> [@PatriotX](#): > > [Let’s play “I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Men/Women!”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=189852) > I agree w/ **bdgr** I’ve spent many a day figuring out how to _consistently and repeatedly_ get exactly what I want out of my coffee preparation methods. I have systems (each slightly unorthodox) for my ibrik, french press, and stove top espresso. I measure everything and am not afraid to use an electronic timer. > Make fun of me if you wish, but I really enjoy _my_ coffee. What, no vac pot? I spent hours and many pounds of coffee dialing in my Cory Electric vacuum pot to get the right extraction time. Good to find another coffee geek on the board. I built my own coffay roaster and for months had a La Marzocco Linea and Swift taking up most of the kitchen. At some point you have to ask yourself if you just enjoy coffee, or is it something more sinister…Well…I should ask myself that, but I’m not entirely sure I want to know the answer. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/70 "2005-03-02T18:03:29Z")
Wow! My first threadspotting OP. Thank you, thank you. ---
**Author:** ![Tierce](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@Tierce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tierce)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/71 "2005-03-02T19:17:48Z")
> [@elmwood](#): > > Wow! My first threadspotting OP. > > Thank you, thank you. Unfortunately I’m far too modest to take even partial credit. Congratulations. 😉 By the way, I tried a venti seven-shot three-shot-decaf one-and-a-half-pump sugar-free amaretto hundred and seventy degree two percent seven Nutrasweet with whip extra caramel extra sprinkles caramel macchiato with a twist of lemon the other day. It was disgusting. Just so you know. (Truth disclosure: I didn’t really. Just a joke, folks.) ---
**Author:** ![PatriotX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@PatriotX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatriotX)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/72 "2005-03-02T19:31:57Z")
> [@bdgr](#): > > What, no vac pot? At the moment, we’re pretty tight on space. In the recent past I’ve had trouble justifying the expense to my wife who merely loves coffee. I take it you think they’re worth it. > [@bdgr](#): > > Good to find another coffee geek on the board. When you go out, have you ever tried sending back some espresso shots? I don’t even try anymore. I just ask for some salt and heavy cream. ---
**Author:** ![PatriotX](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c4cdca/32.png) [@PatriotX](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PatriotX)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/73 "2005-03-02T19:56:48Z")
The most complicated (as in hardest for them to get right) drink possible at Starbucks is a triple espresso. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [March 2, 2005, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/74 "2005-03-02T21:14:05Z")
> [@Tierce](#): > > (Truth disclosure: I didn’t really. Just a joke, folks.) But … I’d like to order one, just to see how it would taste. Better yet, see the reactions of the baristas and others waiting in line. ---
**Author:** ![bdgr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a87d85/32.png) [@bdgr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bdgr)\ **Post date:** [March 3, 2005, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561/75 "2005-03-03T14:38:22Z")
> [@PatriotX](#): > > At the moment, we’re pretty tight on space. In the recent past I’ve had trouble justifying the expense to my wife who merely loves coffee. > I take it you think they’re worth it. I love my vac pots, best straight brewed coffay I ever had. I have 6 of them…two corys, two nicros, a sunbeam and a bodum santos. > [@](#): > > When you go out, have you ever tried sending back some espresso shots? I don’t even try anymore. I just ask for some salt and heavy cream. No, I never have sent one back. I’ve been tempted to, but I’m too nice. Now that I have my own coffee shop, I don’t ever order one when i go out. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-complicated-drink-possible-at-starbucks/291561.md?page=3)