“fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can’t get fooled again”
G W Bush
“Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do” R W Reagan
Has anyone heard the tape where LBJ talks about his nutsack and bunghole?
Some others:
Nixon: We could get that [i.e., hush money].
Carter: I was talking to my daughter Amy…
Reagan: We’re doing everything we can (after Nancy prompted him to say exactly that).
LBJ: I had more women on accident than Kennedy did on purpose.
JFK (to Teddy): Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you have to be faithful.
Yes, he’s talking to Haggar’s son, and it sounds like he’s a one of my relatives
Sounds like he has good, Texas testicles.
It’s not famous, but by Og it outta be:
[QUOTE=Barack Obama]
Contrary to the rumours that you’ve heard, I was not born in a manger. I was actually born on Krypton and sent here by my father, Jor-El, to save the planet Earth.
[/QUOTE]
No love for “now watch this drive”?
Carter: Take that, rabbit!
Nixon: You won’t have Richard Nixon to kick around anymore.
Washington: Cherry tree? What cherry tree?
Pary pooper!
Ford: Oops!
Kennedy:* “Ich bin ein Berliner”*
Paraently this is a mis-quote but
“We have lost the South for a generation”
by LBJ.
Except he didn’t actually use that word in that speech. Not once. The media named it the “malaise” speech later.
Also, btw, the internet is teeming with fake quotes from various founding fathers, most of them in support of some right-wing talking point.
Mallard Fillmore: “Quack.”
Even though only a handful of people heard it, President Obama’s “We got him” is probably his most famous quote.
No, but here’s a good one from Wikiquote:
I’ve often read/heard that LBJ said that when signing the Civil Rights Act of 1964 or the Voting Rights Act of 1965 – supposedly he said it to Bill Moyers – but I can’t find it on Wikiquote, at any rate. (By “we” he would have meant the Democrats – prescient if true.)
“This administration has proved that it is utterly incapable of cleaning out the corruption which has completely eroded it and reestablishing the confidence and faith of the American people in the morality and honesty of their government employees.” (1951 – he meant the Truman Administration. :p)
“The Jewish cabal is out to get me.”
“The greatest honor history can bestow is the title of peacemaker.”
“You know, it’s a funny thing, every one of the bastards that are out for legalizing marijuana are Jewish. What the Christ is the matter with the Jews, Bob? What is the matter with them? I suppose it is because most of them are psychiatrists.”
“Many Jews in the Communist conspiracy. … Chambers and Hiss were the only non-Jews. … Many thought that Hiss was. He could have been a half. … Every other one was a Jew — and it raised hell for us. But in this case, I hope to God he’s not a Jew.”
“The Jews are irreligious, atheistic, immoral bunch of bastards.”
“Well, when the President does it, that means that it is not illegal.”
“I don’t think a woman should be in any government job whatever. I mean, I really don’t. The reason why I do is mainly because they are erratic. And emotional.”
“As long as I’m sitting in the chair, there’s not going to be any Jew appointed to that court. [No Jew] can be right on the criminal-law issue.”
“Nixon: The only place where you and I disagree … is with regard to the bombing. You’re so goddamned concerned about civilians and I don’t give a damn. I don’t care.”
“Kissinger: I’m concerned about the civilians because I don’t want the world to be mobilized against you as a butcher.”
“What are our schools for if not for indoctrination against communism?”
“I have the greatest affection for them [Negroes] but I know they’re not going to make it for 500 years. They aren’t. You know it, too. The Mexicans are a different cup of tea. They have a heritage. At the present time they steal, they’re dishonest, but they do have some concept of family life. They don’t live like a bunch of dogs, which the Negroes do live like.”
“You know what happened to the Romans? The last six Roman emperors were fags. Neither in a public way. You know what happened to the popes? They were layin’ the nuns; that’s been goin’ on for years, centuries. But the Catholic Church went to hell three or four centuries ago. It was homosexual, and it had to be cleaned out. That’s what’s happened to Britain. It happened earlier to France. Let’s look at the strong societies. The Russians. Goddamn, they root 'em out. They don’t let 'em around at all. I don’t know what they do with them. Look at this country. You think the Russians allow dope? Homosexuality, dope, immorality, are the enemies of strong societies. That’s why the Communists and left-wingers are clinging to one another. They’re trying to destroy us. I know Moynihan will disagree with this, [Attorney General John] Mitchell will, and Garment will. But, goddamn, we have to stand up to this.”
“There are times when an abortion is necessary. I know that. When you have a black and a white. Or a rape.”
"Penalties against drug use should not be more damaging to an individual than the use of the drug itself. Nowhere is this more clear than in the laws against the possession of marijuana in private for personal use. "
Which marked the least bigoted thing he ever said.
Presidents 2 and 3 died on the same day. Adams’ last words were supposedly “Thomas Jefferson survives” (he was dead by that point).
Good one. His other famous quote “Tell that to Mrs. Coolidge”, maybe embellished, involves the Coolidge effect.
Taft: what’s this I hear about a “Wanda’s Macaroni Salad”?
Jefferson: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.
Lincoln: Four score and twenty years ago, our forefathers . . . etc.
Jefferson - “I hold it, that a little rebellion, now and then, is a good thing”
Ah, a very misunderstood quote, along with the blood and the Tree of Liberty part.
Jefferson was NOT endorsing the success of rebellion, only the threat of it. He was saying the existence of rebellion was not an indication that a governmental system was a failure. He said such rebellions should be confronted by reason - just explain why the rebels are wrong, maybe pacify them by changing your policies, but either way, it’s part of the democratic process. He wasn’t saying that we need a revolution every once in a while, just that we should expect some people to try.
He was responding to critics in England who laughed at the fact that, having just won our rebellion against them, we promptly had to put down our own (the Whiskey Rebellion and Shays’ Rebellion).
G.W. Bush: “I can hear you. The rest of the world hears you. And the people who knocked down these buildings will hear all of us soon.” (said at the World Trade Center right after the attack, when somebody shouted out, “We can’t hear you”)
Clinton also has, “It depends on what your definition of the word ‘is’ is”, but the one that stands out for me is, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”
Carter: The one memorable quote I can think of is, “Our country will not go” (to the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow).
Ford: “I, Gerald R. Ford, President of the United States…do grant a full, free, and absolute pardon unto Richard Nixon”.
LBJ: “I shall not seek, and I will not accept, the nomination of my party for another term as your president.” (A close second is the quote from the “Daisy” TV commercial: “These are the stakes! To make a world in which all of God’s children can live, or to go into the dark.”)
I agree with the OP on GHW Bush, Reagan, Nixon, Kennedy, and FDR.
Jefferson: I realize this is written instead of spoken, but I can’t think of a more memorable one than, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”
And since some of the answers are joke answers, allow me to add one of my own:
Hoover: “What do you mean, I have to go to San Francisco to get a new football?” (Hoover, while he was attending Stanford, was the football team’s equipment manager, and the one ball they had at the first ever California-Stanford football game burst, so the game was delayed until Hoover could travel from Palo Alto to San Francisco to get a new one - and remember, this was in the days before automobiles.)