# Most Rapes Are About Power, Not Sex **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [September 5, 2009, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939 "2009-09-05T03:35:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![rhubarbarin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eb9ed0/32.png) [@rhubarbarin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rhubarbarin)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/21 "2009-09-05T16:58:19Z")
In my opinion, the statement ‘rape is about power, not sex’ is… nonsensical. Rape is sex. It’s defined as such: a non-consensual sex act with one party being forced by the other. Of course it is not the same as consensual sex, nor does it always take place with sex or an orgasm on the perpetrator’s part as the primary motivation. ‘Rape is not about sex, it’s about power’ seeks to diminish victim-blaming, and also to draw a heavy line between ‘enthusiastic consent’ (between those over the legal age of consent), and coercion and forceful rape. For these reasons it is very useful. It has its roots in the feminist movement. ---
**Author:** ![constanze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@constanze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/constanze)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/22 "2009-09-05T17:06:37Z")
Okay, let me repeat the important point from my above post: **Power rape** , according to Groth, is a form of compensation, committed usually by men who feel unsure of their competence. **Rape gives them a sense of mastery and control.** from Nicholas Groth, director of **Forensic Mental Health Associates**. It’s one of his three types of rapists, the other being anger and sadism. So could we all please stop these "it’s the feminists! " comments? ---
**Author:** ![fisha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/da6949/32.png) [@fisha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fisha)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/23 "2009-09-05T18:56:06Z")
> [@constanze](#): > > If rape were a result of men not getting enough sex, then prostitutes would stop the need for rapes. But not all rapes happen because men are under pressure after three years on a desert island. The rate of rape in the US has gone done 85% in the last 30 years. We haven’t legalized prostitution nationwide, but we have had a tremendous increase on porn. I would suspect there is a correlation. ---
**Author:** ![Nametag](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nametag/32/406_2.png) [@Nametag](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nametag)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/24 "2009-09-05T20:02:46Z")
> [@fisha](#): > > The rate of rape in the US has gone done 85% in the last 30 years. Cite? ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/25 "2009-09-05T20:14:18Z")
> [@Nametag](#): > > Cite? Not sure if it’s 85%, but it’s certainly [plummeted](http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/glance/rape.htm). In fact, that goes for [serious violent crime](http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/glance/cv2.htm) in general. ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/26 "2009-09-05T20:50:39Z")
I will add my IMHO spiritual answer Rape is the forcing of a soul tie between the rapist and the victim, the 2 are forced to become one. During this time the guilt of the sexual sins of the rapist is forced onto the victim, Usually rape victims feel ashamed, even of their own body - this is the guilt that has been transferred, which frees the rapist from that guilt and shame. This is different then what we call ‘date rape’ which the victim is usually the one who caused the rape. It is the use of spiritual power to free the person raped of sexual guilt, as it is transferred to the one doing the raping, but that person is spiritually controlled by the other as they have submitted to them. In this way the one raped can free themselves as the other person bears the weight of the sin. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Poster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Happy\_Poster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Poster)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/27 "2009-09-05T21:09:05Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I will add my IMHO spiritual answer > > Rape is the forcing of a soul tie between the rapist and the victim, the 2 are forced to become one. During this time the guilt of the sexual sins of the rapist is forced onto the victim, Usually rape victims feel ashamed, even of their own body - this is the guilt that has been transferred, which frees the rapist from that guilt and shame. > > This is different then what we call ‘date rape’ which the victim is usually the one who caused the rape. It is the use of spiritual power to free the person raped of sexual guilt, as it is transferred to the one doing the raping, but that person is spiritually controlled by the other as they have submitted to them. In this way the one raped can free themselves as the other person bears the weight of the sin. lol, dude, wtf? ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/28 "2009-09-05T21:17:42Z")
> [@Angry Lurker](#): > > lol, dude, wtf? The answer to the question in this post is just: **Kanicbird** ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/29 "2009-09-05T23:02:45Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I will add my IMHO spiritual answer > > Rape is the forcing of a soul tie between the rapist and the victim, the 2 are forced to become one. During this time the guilt of the sexual sins of the rapist is forced onto the victim, Usually rape victims feel ashamed, even of their own body - this is the guilt that has been transferred, which frees the rapist from that guilt and shame. > > This is different then what we call ‘date rape’ which the victim is usually the one who caused the rape. It is the use of spiritual power to free the person raped of sexual guilt, as it is transferred to the one doing the raping, but that person is spiritually controlled by the other as they have submitted to them. In this way the one raped can free themselves as the other person bears the weight of the sin. Holy cow! That is some top-notch crazy right there! So in the case of date rape, you’re essentially saying, “She was asking for it.” ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/30 "2009-09-05T23:12:43Z")
> [@Tangent](#): > > top-notch crazy AKA every recent post by **kanicbird**. Just pat it on the head and move on. ---
**Author:** ![constanze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@constanze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/constanze)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/31 "2009-09-05T23:13:55Z")
That’s the compassion of the _truely_ religious and spiritual people. Anybody who feels for the victim is still on too low a plane to get this.😃 ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Skeezix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/aca169/32.png) [@Red\_Skeezix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Skeezix)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/32 "2009-09-05T23:16:20Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > \ > This is different then what we call ‘date rape’ which the victim is usually the one who caused the rape. \ So, when it happens to your mother or sister, we can call her a dirty dirty slut who was asking for it?:rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/33 "2009-09-05T23:29:51Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > I will add my IMHO spiritual answer > > Rape is the forcing of a soul tie between the rapist and the victim, the 2 are forced to become one. During this time the guilt of the sexual sins of the rapist is forced onto the victim, Usually rape victims feel ashamed, even of their own body - this is the guilt that has been transferred, which frees the rapist from that guilt and shame. > > This is different then what we call ‘date rape’ which the victim is usually the one who caused the rape. It is the use of spiritual power to free the person raped of sexual guilt, as it is transferred to the one doing the raping, but that person is spiritually controlled by the other as they have submitted to them. In this way the one raped can free themselves as the other person bears the weight of the sin. [Moderator Note] **kanicbird** , I have specifically requested that posters address the factual aspects of the question, and to provide references on the subject as much as possible. By interjecting a statement that you yourself acknowledge as an opinion, when I clearly asked participants not to, you are flagrantly ignoring moderator instructions. I am not making this a warning yet, but any further comments by you of this nature in this thread will receive one. If you have questions about this, please take them to ATMB; do not dispute this here. I would also request that other posters not further engage **kanicbird** on his statements here. That’s a sure route to a hijack. If you want to discuss his post, please open another thread in Great Debates or the Pit. Colibri General Questions Moderator ---
**Author:** ![kanicbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/5f8ce5/32.png) [@kanicbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kanicbird)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/34 "2009-09-05T23:35:11Z")
> [@Tangent](#): > > Holy cow! That is some top-notch crazy right there! So in the case of date rape, you’re essentially saying, “She was asking for it.” No you put it way to nicely, it is the equivalent of her (or him) holding the other person’s family hostage with the threat unless you rape me and take the blame I will kill them. It is extremely evil and very very deceptive. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/35 "2009-09-05T23:39:04Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > No you put it way to nicely, it is the equivalent of her (or him) holding the other person’s family hostage with the threat unless you rape me and take the blame I will kill them. It is extremely evil and very very deceptive. [Moderator Warning] **Kanicbird,** I am issuing you an official warning for not following moderator instructions. I am also instructing you to make no further posts in this thread. Colibri General Questions Moderator ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Poster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Happy\_Poster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Poster)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2009, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/36 "2009-09-05T23:59:38Z")
I have started a thread in great debates related to this: [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=11523534#post11523534](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=11523534#post11523534) ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2009, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/37 "2009-09-06T00:52:13Z")
> [@Colibri](#): > > [Moderator Warning] > > **Kanicbird,** I am issuing you an official warning for not following moderator instructions. I am also instructing you to make no further posts in this thread. > > Colibri > General Questions Moderator [Warning rescinded] I have received an e-mail from **kanicbird** saying that he did not see my note before his follow-up post. I am therefore rescinding the official warning. **kanicbird** has also agreed not to post further in this thread, so please do not comment on his posts above. Please take any additional discussion to the GD thread started by **Angry Lurker** above. Colibri General Questions Moderator ---
**Author:** ![Gcat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c0e974/32.png) [@Gcat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gcat)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2009, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/38 "2009-09-06T00:58:05Z")
> [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > What if some guy who had been stranded on an island all alone for three years all of a sudden discovered a beautiful woman who had just washed up on the shore, grabbed her and raped her? Is that about power? I don’t think so. I think he was so horny that he just wanted to fuck a woman and he didn’t care whether she consented to it. Why is it always “a beautiful woman”? In this scenario, if a 90 year old woman wash up on the shore, he would rape her, since he is horny. Heck, if a male washed up, he would rape him, since he was horny. ---
**Author:** ![AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2009, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/39 "2009-09-06T04:39:59Z")
> [@](#): > > This is different then what we call ‘date rape’ which the victim is usually the one who caused the rape. WTF?!??! Ummmm no. Date rape can range from anything from “Spur Posse” type of sex games to a misunderstanding about what two people wanted. It’s not the victim’s fault at ALL. Rape is due to very misplaced anger in men. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2009, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939/40 "2009-09-06T05:22:40Z")
> [@AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](#): > > WTF?!??! > Ummmm no. Date rape can range from anything from “Spur Posse” type of sex games to a misunderstanding about what two people wanted. > It’s not the victim’s fault at ALL. > Rape is due to very misplaced anger in men. [Moderator Note] Once again, there is no point in commenting on **kanicbird’s** posts, since he has agreed not to post further in this thread. You may discuss **kanicbird’s** statements in the GD thread started by **Angry Lurker** above. Colibri General Questions Moderator [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-rapes-are-about-power-not-sex/508939.md?page=1)