# Most spectacular way in which you or a coworker has quit or been fired from a job **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 1, 2009, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600 "2009-07-01T18:21:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![FallenAngel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@FallenAngel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FallenAngel)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2010, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/141 "2010-08-17T22:39:08Z")
I worked in marketing for a mid sized business phone system manufacturer that used to be CEO’d by a major control freak. He was the founder and the primary shareholder, but he was just a flat out loon. My VP was a guy whose wife worked for Great Leader and was also his mistress. Yes, the whole company AND MY VP knew about it. VP wouldn’t quit because he would lose his shares in the company if he did, and they were worth a good amount. My director was a woman who had an absolute terror of confrontation. She hated the company and everyone above her, but she hadn’t fully vested yet and didn’t want to lose her shares. My manager was a good person and real workaholic but an absolutely anal perfectionist who also wouldn’t say, “No,” to anyone above her pay grade. That made working for her a living hell when you’d put two months of effort into a campaign and then have it rejected because the VP or the CEO didn’t like the font or some such. Anyway, the work environment was lousy across the company. Engineers quit left and right and deleted their project files, everyone in my team of 4 was constantly looking for another job, etc. I finally found another gig and gave my notice, which shocked my manager. She came from one of those strict families where nothing is ever discussed and you must pretend that everything is happy happy joy joy at all times, and she carried this into how she managed. On my last day, my director told me my exit interview was scheduled for 3:00 and that it would be with the entire department. I didn’t care, I was finally going to be free of that hellhole. Well, the other three specialists on my team took me out for lunch. It turned into a long lunch. There was much drinking involved. We got back to office around 2 and I packed up my stuff. At 3 we all file into the conference room for my exit interview, which, as an aside, is just about the single dumbest practice I’ve encountered in 15 years of corporate work. I got the whole, “We’re sorry to see you go, yadda yadda,” from the director and manager when the VP, who was in town for the day, stuck his head in and said he wanted to sit in. The director had a couple of softball questions for me and then asked, “So, why is it you felt you wanted to leave and go work for another company?” Now, I had I been sober, I would have thrown out the usual better opportunity for advancement, the new company is doing some exciting things, etc. bullshit. Instead I said (quoted as well as I can recall), “You can’t fucking be serious!” I pointed to the VP, “The CEO a dictatorial lunatic who is fucking your wife and you’re too much of a pussy to quit or put a stop to it.” I pointed at the director, “You’re so desperate for validation that you collapse like a Jenga tower if anyone above you disagrees with any idea you have, but you refuse to walk until your stock vests.” I pointed at the manager, "You’re so stoic and filled with self loathing because daddy didn’t hug you enough that you take any ridiculous assignment and deadline with no budget and no guidelines and flog us like mules to do the impossible for the idiots leading the company who have driven the share price down by more than 50 percent in the last two years. How’s that stock looking now, folks? “The emperor has no fucking clothes and I’m tired of having to look at his wrinkly ballsack as he flounces down the street. Fuck this. I’m out of here,” and I stood up and left, put my stuff in my car and drove across the street to Denny’s to have a few cups of coffee and sober up for a couple of hours before I drove home. When I got home there was a message from one of the other guys on my team saying that no one said a word for a full two minutes after I left and that he was the first one to speak. He said, “Yeah, I quit too.” ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2010, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/142 "2010-08-18T03:37:59Z")
> [@FallenAngel](#): > > I worked in marketing for a mid sized business phone system manufacturer that used to be CEO’d by a major control freak. He was the founder and the primary shareholder, but he was just a flat out loon. > > My VP was a guy whose wife worked for Great Leader and was also his mistress. Yes, the whole company AND MY VP knew about it. VP wouldn’t quit because he would lose his shares in the company if he did, and they were worth a good amount. > > My director was a woman who had an absolute terror of confrontation. She hated the company and everyone above her, but she hadn’t fully vested yet and didn’t want to lose her shares. > > My manager was a good person and real workaholic but an absolutely anal perfectionist who also wouldn’t say, “No,” to anyone above her pay grade. That made working for her a living hell when you’d put two months of effort into a campaign and then have it rejected because the VP or the CEO didn’t like the font or some such. > > Anyway, the work environment was lousy across the company. Engineers quit left and right and deleted their project files, everyone in my team of 4 was constantly looking for another job, etc. > > I finally found another gig and gave my notice, which shocked my manager. She came from one of those strict families where nothing is ever discussed and you must pretend that everything is happy happy joy joy at all times, and she carried this into how she managed. > > On my last day, my director told me my exit interview was scheduled for 3:00 and that it would be with the entire department. I didn’t care, I was finally going to be free of that hellhole. > > Well, the other three specialists on my team took me out for lunch. It turned into a long lunch. There was much drinking involved. We got back to office around 2 and I packed up my stuff. > > At 3 we all file into the conference room for my exit interview, which, as an aside, is just about the single dumbest practice I’ve encountered in 15 years of corporate work. > > I got the whole, “We’re sorry to see you go, yadda yadda,” from the director and manager when the VP, who was in town for the day, stuck his head in and said he wanted to sit in. > > The director had a couple of softball questions for me and then asked, “So, why is it you felt you wanted to leave and go work for another company?” > > Now, I had I been sober, I would have thrown out the usual better opportunity for advancement, the new company is doing some exciting things, etc. bullshit. Instead I said (quoted as well as I can recall), “You can’t fucking be serious!” I pointed to the VP, “The CEO a dictatorial lunatic who is fucking your wife and you’re too much of a pussy to quit or put a stop to it.” I pointed at the director, “You’re so desperate for validation that you collapse like a Jenga tower if anyone above you disagrees with any idea you have, but you refuse to walk until your stock vests.” I pointed at the manager, "You’re so stoic and filled with self loathing because daddy didn’t hug you enough that you take any ridiculous assignment and deadline with no budget and no guidelines and flog us like mules to do the impossible for the idiots leading the company who have driven the share price down by more than 50 percent in the last two years. How’s that stock looking now, folks? > > “The emperor has no fucking clothes and I’m tired of having to look at his wrinkly ballsack as he flounces down the street. Fuck this. I’m out of here,” and I stood up and left, put my stuff in my car and drove across the street to Denny’s to have a few cups of coffee and sober up for a couple of hours before I drove home. > > When I got home there was a message from one of the other guys on my team saying that no one said a word for a full two minutes after I left and that he was the first one to speak. He said, “Yeah, I quit too.” Wow, you’re my new hero. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2010, 5:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/143 "2010-08-18T05:15:52Z")
> [@joebuck20](#): > > > [@FallenAngel](#): > > > > I worked in marketing for a mid sized business phone system manufacturer that used to be CEO’d by a major control freak. He was the founder and the primary shareholder, but he was just a flat out loon. > > > > … > > > > When I got home there was a message from one of the other guys on my team saying that no one said a word for a full two minutes after I left and that he was the first one to speak. He said, “Yeah, I quit too.” > > Wow, you’re my new hero. Seconded. ---
**Author:** ![Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/a9a28c/32.png) [@Oslo\_Ostragoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oslo_Ostragoth)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2010, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/144 "2010-08-18T05:20:29Z")
> [@jlzania](#): > > Back in the day when I was waitressing my way through college, I worked in a family owned restaurant. > My male boss was a total dick who liked to pinch asses and cop feels whenever he could. > Most of the other girls tolerated it and made cultural excuses for him. > He pulled that on me when I was slicing a loaf of bread so I swung round with the bread knife, pointed it at his throat and told him if he ever did that again, I use it and then inform his wife and his sister (who also worked there, why). > He never touched me again but he did try make my life hell whenever he could. > > One day I was on the phone with his wife talking about my upcoming schedule. > He walked in to the kitchen, ordered me to hang up and then proceeded to rant in front of all the staff that I was an American slut who wasted time by talking to my boyfriends at work. > I explained that what I was actually doing and asked him to apologize. > He refused. > So I walked into the center of the restaurant on a very busy Saturday night, banged on a glass with a spoon to get everyone’s attention and dramatically tore up all my order tickets. > Told the regs that I was sorry their dinner would be delayed and why I was leaving. > Got a round of applause, bowed and left. Please say that it started with the Slow Clap. ---
**Author:** ![Prelude\_to\_Fascination](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a183cd/32.png) [@Prelude\_to\_Fascination](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prelude_to_Fascination)\ **Post date:** [August 18, 2010, 5:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/145 "2010-08-18T17:02:31Z")
Not spectacular, but one of the worst (i.e., humiliating): many years ago, I was hired as a waiter/asst manager in a fast food pizza joint. I’d never waited tables before, so I was sloppy and slow, and had no clue what I was doing. Add to that I wasn’t given a uniform, but wore my street clothes. Actually, I was given the store hat to wear with my street clothes. Four days into my job, I was fired. Reason: the manager who hired me went to a different store (or quit or was fired or something), and had no business hiring me in the first place. The upshot is I was used as a pawn for the manager who hired me to make the restaurant look bad. If I’d known better, I would’ve gone after them, but I was too young, stupid and naive at the time. ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/146 "2010-10-08T16:13:01Z")
> [@robby](#): > > …2. The next guy was a Division Officer who apparently couldn’t deal with going to sea. One morning he didn’t show up for work, so the Executive Officer (XO) drove to the BOQ to check on him, only to find him passed out in the room’s closet. He reportedly had hit his head. After getting him checked out thoroughly at the medical clinic, he was returned to duty, but the delay had caused him to miss the sub’s departure for a planned weekly outing at sea. He was ordered to report to the submarine squadron each day while his sub was at sea. After not showing up for work at squadron a few days later, he was again found passed out in his room after allegedly hitting his head. This time he was admitted to the hospital and got a full workup, only to be released after they couldn’t find anything wrong with him. > > After being released from the hospital, he was ordered to confine himself to his BOQ room and to call the squadron duty officer every six hours around the clock to check in and ensure that he wasn’t passed out again. He called for a day or so, then stopped calling. The squadron duty officer went to his BOQ room again, only to find the place trashed and him missing. He was listed as a deserter, and an all-points bulletin (APB) was put out on him. He was picked up and arrested after being found sleeping in a rest stop in his car halfway across the country. This guy didn’t get NJP–he was actually court-martialed. Some rule required that he first be returned to the unit he’d deserted from, so he was brought back to the submarine in handcuffs, then transported to the brig on base. He got a less than honorable discharge from the Navy, IIRC. Unlike a civilian job, you can’t just decide to not show up for work when you’re in the military. **robby** , I know you may not know the answer to this, but did you ever find out what the deal was with this guy? Did he actually hit his head? Was it on purpose? Was he passing out for some reason? Just curious. ---
**Author:** ![robby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/robby/32/11048_2.png) [@robby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robby)\ **Post date:** [October 8, 2010, 9:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/147 "2010-10-08T21:06:19Z")
> [@a35362](#): > > **robby** , I know you may not know the answer to this, but did you ever find out what the deal was with this guy? Did he actually hit his head? Was it on purpose? Was he passing out for some reason? Just curious. They never found any medical reason for him to pass out, and while it’s bizarre enough for someone to accidentally hit their head hard enough to pass out once, it strains credulity that it could happen again a few days later. At that point, it’s no longer an accident, and they were probably trying to decide if it was a mental health issue or simple malingering. That changed when he decided to pack it in and head on a road trip. At that point, it’s my impression that they decided he was malingering and was doing it all on purpose. ---
**Author:** ![Perciful](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Perciful](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Perciful)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2010, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/148 "2010-10-09T23:35:52Z")
Most spectacular- I saw a coworker get fired for tipping over a “Port O Potty” with a guy he didn’t like in it. He probably would have just gotten a verbal warning for getting the guy all covered in crap except it went over backwards into the river in 4 feet of water. The man inside was ok but very angry. The most humiliating firing was seeing a coworker walked out by the police in hand cuffs for being a pedophile with his young niece. They went through his car and took out dildos and pictures and towed the car. A couple of men made grand company exits by hanging themselves at work. One in the 1970’s and one in the 1990’s. ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2010, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/149 "2010-10-10T00:43:31Z")
This: [My wonderful new job... Oh Shit! - Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share - Straight Dope Message Board](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=569192) ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2010, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/150 "2010-10-10T03:05:39Z")
> [@Perciful](#): > > Most spectacular- I saw a coworker get fired for tipping over a “Port O Potty” with a guy he didn’t like in it. He probably would have just gotten a verbal warning for getting the guy all covered in crap except it went over backwards into the river in 4 feet of water. The man inside was ok but very angry. > > The most humiliating firing was seeing a coworker walked out by the police in hand cuffs for being a pedophile with his young niece. They went through his car and took out dildos and pictures and towed the car. > > A couple of men made grand company exits by hanging themselves at work. One in the 1970’s and one in the 1990’s. Where the hell do you work? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Tess](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@Tess](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tess)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2010, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/151 "2010-10-15T06:36:33Z")
I’m still trying to get the details, but this evening I was heading back from my lunch break when two of our guards waved me over. Them: “What the hell’s going on?” Me: “Huh?” Apparently one of the guys from my department was walked out, in handcuffs, by local deputies this afternoon. I’m pretty sure he’s not coming back. ---
**Author:** ![FatBaldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@FatBaldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FatBaldGuy)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2010, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/152 "2010-10-15T13:56:02Z")
You most definitely need to come back here with more details when you find out. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [October 15, 2010, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600/153 "2010-10-15T13:57:53Z")
> [@ChockFullOfHeadyGoodness](#): > > Not spectacular, but weird. A coworker went to his supervisor late Friday afternoon and gave notice. … . On Saturday they went to visit him, and found his landlady inspecting his empty apartment. She told them he had terminated his lease the day before. His car was still parked on the street, but everything else was gone. > … A week later we heard from his sister in northern California. He had showed up at her door with his bicycle. > … It turned out that while on a business trip to Indonesia he had picked up some parasite which was screwing with his brain chemistry and made him intensely paranoid. > A few months later, after he was all better, he was rehired. Wow. I’ll remember THAT story for sure. An Indonesian Paranoia Parasite? I gotta find out more about this! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-spectacular-way-in-which-you-or-a-coworker-has-quit-or-been-fired-from-a-job/501600.md?page=7)