# Most unenjoyably Pretentious Movies **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 24, 2004, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171 "2004-03-24T19:16:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/41 "2004-03-25T19:03:25Z")
Man, you poor poor people. 97% of the movies mentioned above are good movies worth the effort. Not every movie can be Princess Bride or Little Nicky. ---
**Author:** ![MaxTheVool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@MaxTheVool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MaxTheVool)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/42 "2004-03-25T19:47:47Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Man, you poor poor people. > > 97% of the movies mentioned above are good movies worth the effort. > > Not every movie can be Princess Bride or Little Nicky. Yes, because finding a movie pretentious means that one only can digest pre-packaged Hollywood pablum. Sheesh. What an offensive and idiotic comment. ---
**Author:** ![Miller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/miller/32/481_2.png) [@Miller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Miller)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/43 "2004-03-25T19:58:24Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Man, you poor poor people. > > 97% of the movies mentioned above are good movies worth the effort. > > Not every movie can be Princess Bride or Little Nicky. Speaking of pretentious… ---
**Author:** ![BlackKnight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/eb8c5e/32.png) [@BlackKnight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BlackKnight)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/44 "2004-03-25T20:06:00Z")
> [@Nonsuch](#): > > I think any movie that is not a Biblical epic in which a character actually sees Christ is, _by definition_, pretentious. (And probably lousy, as _Bad Lieutenant_ certainly was.) Except Orgasmo. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/45 "2004-03-25T20:16:47Z")
"Looks like I win, nobody has mentioned The Matrix: Reloaded and Revolutions in this thread. /K.O. punch" Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner, with a knockout in the first round…the winner, and undisputed heavyweight champion of the world as the most pretentious pieces of shit ever to be captured on film is, and remains, The Matrix and all of its spawn. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/46 "2004-03-25T20:18:37Z")
> [@MaxTheVool](#): > > Yes, because finding a movie pretentious means that one only can digest pre-packaged Hollywood pablum. Sheesh. What an offensive and idiotic comment. OK. If the above-mentioned movies aren’t worth the work they require, can you name some movies that ARE worth the work? Name some non “prepackaged Hollywood pablum” that are good movies. I guess that would be \*enjoyably \* pretentious movies? ---
**Author:** ![elfbabe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b782af/32.png) [@elfbabe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfbabe)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/47 "2004-03-25T20:31:01Z")
The dancing in Talk to Her/Hable con ella IS pretty weird, I agree, but there’s really not that much of it, and I don’t think that “properly” appreciating it is really important to understanding the movie. There’s so much else there other than the dancing! ---
**Author:** ![Achren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/898d66/32.png) [@Achren](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Achren)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/48 "2004-03-25T21:50:28Z")
I second Gosford Park, though that may be because my friend kept telling me it was a murder mystery, which it really wasn’t. ---
**Author:** ![fruitbat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/58f4c7/32.png) [@fruitbat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fruitbat)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/49 "2004-03-25T21:50:46Z")
\*The Thin Red Line \* deserves more than a passing mention. Dozens of famous actors all of whom seem to have demanded a poetic and touching dying speech. _Gods and Generals_ was just about as bad in that regard. What it didn’t have was John Travolta with that teeny tiny hat perched on top of his melon. I think we were being tested to see how long we could take the movie seriously. ---
**Author:** ![Doomtrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/0ea827/32.png) [@Doomtrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doomtrain)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/50 "2004-03-25T22:18:49Z")
_Thin Red Line_ also deserves mention for the barrage of random scenery shots. Oooh! A tree! How moving. Cause it’s like…the beauty of nature vs. the cruelty of man or something! ON WITH THE WAR, MOVIE! ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/51 "2004-03-25T22:23:39Z")
> [@GMRyujin](#): > > _Thin Red Line_ also deserves mention for the barrage of random scenery shots. Oooh! A tree! How moving. Cause it’s like…the beauty of nature vs. the cruelty of man or something! ON WITH THE WAR, MOVIE! So . . . it’s impossible for a tree to have any legitimate place in a war movie? Why don’t you just watch The Green Berets? Or Shaving Private Ryan? ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/52 "2004-03-25T22:27:15Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > Man, you poor poor people. > > 97% of the movies mentioned above are good movies worth the effort. > > Not every movie can be Princess Bride or Little Nicky. That’s **exactly** the “you don’t understand it” attitude I’m referring to in the opening post. Some of my favorite films are low-budget and independent (e.g _Jesus of Montreal_ and _Mindwalk_) but just because a film **doesn’t** have a car chase or **does** have a close-up of a doormat, three dicks and a reference to Kierkegaard in the first fifteen minutes doesn’t mean it’s cerebral. There’s also a huge overlap of people who think anything arthouse is by definition better with people who think that big budget A-list movies like _Titanic_ or _Contact_ are awful even though they haven’t seen them. Another addition: [Greaser’s Palace](http://imdb.com/title/tt0068659/) - absolutely unwatchable Robert Downey Sr. tripe about a Christlike drifter entering a western town dominated by a constipated gunfighter. Every bit as bad as it sounds. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/53 "2004-03-25T22:28:21Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > So . . . it’s impossible for a tree to have any legitimate place in a war movie? > > Why don’t you just watch The Green Berets? Or Shaving Private Ryan? I always thought it was “Shaving Ryan’s Privates”, myself. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/54 "2004-03-25T22:53:13Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > So . . . it’s impossible for a tree to have any legitimate place in a war movie? > > Why don’t you just watch … Shaving Private Ryan? While it broke the commandment of having a large budget and stars you’ve heard of, it’s a damned good movie and the one that people who were actually there most praised for its realism. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/55 "2004-03-25T23:04:30Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > OK. If the above-mentioned movies aren’t worth the work they require, can you name some movies that ARE worth the work? Name some non “prepackaged Hollywood pablum” that are good movies. _Memento_. Really, **lissener** , you’re being a grade-A nimrod here. Just because folks find _some_ “non-prepackaged Hollywood pablum” movies to be overly pretentious pieces of crap doesn’t mean they think _all_ NPPHP movies are overly pretentious pieces of crap. Hipster arthouse indie films are just as capable of sucking as Hollywood blockbusters, and stuffy twits who heap undeserved praise on overly pretentious pieces of crap are just as annoying as those who heap undeserved praise on the latest Bruckheimer dreck. Moreso, actually, because the arthouse fanboy’s annoyingness is multiplied by his smug sense of intellectual superiority. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/56 "2004-03-25T23:07:15Z")
FTR, I’m saying _Memento_ is a good movie, in response to **lissener** ’s query; I was not proffering it for addition to the list of pretentious crap. ---
**Author:** ![Gadfly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/aeb1de/32.png) [@Gadfly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gadfly)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/57 "2004-03-25T23:14:23Z")
Personally, I thought Being John Malkovich was great, Adaptation decent, and I just saw Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind again - I love the hell out of it. Uhh. Jacob’s Ladder! It was completely ridiculous. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/58 "2004-03-25T23:26:12Z")
> [@Sampiro](#): > > That’s **exactly** the “you don’t understand it” attitude I’m referring to in the opening post. So . . . I’m not allowed to say that I enjoyed them, with a little effort, or else I’m in direct violation to the OP? But what about this: I did enjoy them, and this did require effort. Why do you take this as a personal affront? > [@](#): > > Some of my favorite films are low-budget and independent (e.g _Jesus of Montreal_ and _Mindwalk_) but just because a film **doesn’t** have a car chase or **does** have a close-up of a doormat, three dicks and a reference to Kierkegaard in the first fifteen minutes doesn’t mean it’s cerebral. Um . . . you’re responding to what here? Certainly nothing that I posted. > [@](#): > > There’s also a huge overlap of people who think anything arthouse is by definition better with people who think that big budget A-list movies like _Titanic_ or _Contact_ are awful even though they haven’t seen them. I see a lot of movies, plenty of both. I saw \*Titanic \* twice, even though it’s not a very good movie. I saw it the second time because it’s an excellent special effects catalogue. \*Contact \* is possibly the single most pretentious movie mentioned in this thread so far. And I often see “arthouse” movies that I don’t like: \*Irreversible \* was dreck. French dreck, but dreck. _House of Sand and Fog_ had some good performances, but I wouldn’t watch it again on a bet. > [@](#): > > Another addition: [Greaser’s Palace](http://imdb.com/title/tt0068659/) - absolutely unwatchable Robert Downey Sr. tripe about a Christlike drifter entering a western town dominated by a constipated gunfighter. Every bit as bad as it sounds. And every bit as bad as it was meant to be. Also, with a little effort, you’d see that it’s a hilarious deconstruction of the Catholic church. Here’s a capsule I wrote on it awhile back: > [@](#): > > Though rife with anachronisms (they’re kind of a leitmotif), this film is very dated: it could only be from the end of the sixties. Greaser’s Palace stars Allan Arbus (of TV’s M_A_S\*H) as the Zoot-suited Jessy, who drops out of the sky—with a modern parachute—into the Old West. A series of perplexing but hilarious non sequiturs reveals that he is trying to find his way to Jerusalem to be a “singer/actor”; that he (rather perfunctorily) heals the sick and raises the dead; that he dances better on the surface of a lake than on a stage; and that bleeding from the palms of his hands is his likeliest ticket to fame. The dusty little town is run by the publicly constipated and inexplicably named Seaweedhead Greaser (the local saloon is the eponymous Palace), who keeps his loving mother in a cage; kills his son Lamy Homo again every time Jessy resurrects him; and is inordinately proud of his daughter Cholera, who really packs ‘em in at the Palace. Not to mention the subplot of a woman, who seems to represent the whole of humanity in the film’s odd cosmography, having a VERY BAD DAY at the distant hands (they never share the frame) of a white-bearded old man who can shoot real bullets with an imaginary gun. Confusion reigns, but it’s a hoot nonetheless. Oh, plus there’s Toni Basil riding a horse topless. Definitely low art; I’m not sure where you get “pretentious” from. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/59 "2004-03-25T23:31:21Z")
> [@Dewey Cheatem Undhow](#): > > Hipster arthouse indie films are just as capable of sucking as Hollywood blockbusters, and stuffy twits who heap undeserved praise on overly pretentious pieces of crap are just as annoying as those who heap undeserved praise on the latest Bruckheimer dreck. Moreso, actually, because the arthouse fanboy’s annoyingness is multiplied by his smug sense of intellectual superiority. Whoa. Your frothy adjectives make it seem like this is something that keeps you up nights. You got a specific accusation? These hysterical generalizations smell sourly defensive dude; the smugness is obviously a projection. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2004, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171/60 "2004-03-25T23:38:21Z")
Definitely anything by Peter Greenaway. Unwatchable crap. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/most-unenjoyably-pretentious-movies/236171.md?page=4)