# Move over, Geller: Geo. Simpson, major pistachio, sues everyone in sight **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 3, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684 "2007-12-03T18:29:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2007, 11:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/41 "2007-12-04T23:39:21Z")
[QUOTE=Contrapuntal] He’s sued Randi several times, IIRC. [/QUOTE] And threatened YouTube with legal action if they didn’t remove videos he (Geller) claimed he owned,including snippets of news shows where he appeared. Quivering with courage, YouTube removed them, but others posted copies where Geller can’t touch them or on sites where they are just itching for a fight. So far, Geller has left those alone. Geller claims he is not a magician but has psychic powers, so he sues anyone who claims that he is just doing parlor tricks. Which he is. ---
**Author:** ![ambushed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3bc359/32.png) [@ambushed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ambushed)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/42 "2007-12-05T02:01:55Z")
[QUOTE=Contrapuntal] He’s sued Randi several times, IIRC. [/QUOTE] Worse, IIRC Geller won on a couple of points – minor compared to his losses – but somehow and for some reason CSICOP (now CSI) ended up pretty much breaking all public ties with Randi, a move on CSICOP’s part for which I have no respect. Boo, CSICOP! ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/43 "2007-12-05T02:09:31Z")
[QUOTE=Randy Seltzer] IQuestion for lawyers out there: Can Randi just write “12(b)(6)” on a cocktail napkin, sign it, and file it? Or does it have to be on real paper? [/QUOTE] Translation, please? What does 12(b)(6) refer to? Is that a cite to the CFR, or federal rules of courtroom procedure, or Alien & Sedition Acts, or what? I’m a bit slow today, it took me two tries to get the “pair of pants” joke. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/44 "2007-12-05T04:35:53Z")
[QUOTE=Contrapuntal] Sorry. It was an attempt at a joke, riffing on the plaintiff’s complaint that the JREF posters called him a liar. [/QUOTE] Ah, uh…oh. I AM NOT FEELING DEFENSIVE. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/45 "2007-12-05T04:53:45Z")
[QUOTE=Ogre] I AM NOT FEELING DEFENSIVE. [/QUOTE] LIAR! J’ACCUSE!! ---
**Author:** ![Randy\_Seltzer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ee7513/32.png) [@Randy\_Seltzer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Randy_Seltzer)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/46 "2007-12-05T05:27:28Z")
[QUOTE=Scuba\_Ben] Translation, please? What does 12(b)(6) refer to? Is that a cite to the CFR, or federal rules of courtroom procedure, or Alien & Sedition Acts, or what? I’m a bit slow today, it took me two tries to get the “pair of pants” joke. [/QUOTE] Sorry 'bout that. I was referring to the Federal Rules of Civil Procedure, rule 12(b)(6) which is the motion to dismiss the pleading for failure to state a claim upon which relief can be granted. It’s the basic “I move to toss out this garbage” motion in federal jurisdiction. I haven’t taken civil procedure yet, so the extent of my knowledge on the subject comes from my half-semester “Litigation Basics” class. This complaint seems like such an absolutely perfect example of a pleading that doesn’t state a legitimate claim that I assume any judge will toss it out as soon as he hears the proper motion to dismiss. Can the motion be made on the back of an envelope? Can it be written on a brick and left on the courtroom steps? Ooh! Here’s one: Can it be posted on a message board?!? ---
**Author:** ![enigm4tic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7ba0ec/32.png) [@enigm4tic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enigm4tic)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/47 "2007-12-05T06:36:50Z")
> [@ET CORN GODS!](#): > > The Quick Reference Guide contains a list of the 66 Bible books. Book name, abbreviation, and book position starting from the Old Testament (OT) or New Testament (NT) may be exchanged for equivalents. > Books from Quick Ref. Guide > OT Name Abbrev NT > 01 Genesis Ge 28 > 02 Exodus Ex 29 > 03 Leviticus Lev 30 > > Eve = 0Eve (0 added). 0+66+66+66 = 198 = Sh. Therefore: 0Eve = “She Ve” = “She 2 25” = “She By”. B is 2, book Exodus = “Sex” from above. > > Therefore: Eve = “She Sexy” what. the. hell? Also, somebody should look through those rules and try to turn Straight Dope into something, that should be funny. ---
**Author:** ![fugitive-from-simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/0ea827/32.png) [@fugitive-from-simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fugitive-from-simpson)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 7:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/48 "2007-12-05T07:18:44Z")
ooh, I see we’ve spilled over to another forum. Please enjoy the show 🙂 BTW, George does not claim to be able to decypher any language. He claims the opposite – that only English works. (Which English, I’m not sure). We tried to get him to try other languages but to no avail. Oh, and he kept claiming to be some uber-litigant who had won all his cases – but somehow no court records can be located to show that. It took me at least, some time to figure out that by ‘prose’ he meant ‘pro se’. LashL’s putting together a nice page of all the documents found so far. Go read [http://simpsonlitigation.googlepages.com/home](http://simpsonlitigation.googlepages.com/home) for more fun and games. Now, I wonder if this forum’s going to be as fun as the JREF’s. Please don’t dissapoint 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/49 "2007-12-05T19:39:31Z")
[QUOTE=fugitive-from-simpson] ooh, I see we’ve spilled over to another forum. Please enjoy the show 🙂 [/quote] George? Is that you? 😉 > [@](#): > > Oh, and he kept claiming to be some uber-litigant who had won all his cases – but somehow no court records can be located to show that. It took me at least, some time to figure out that by ‘prose’ he meant ‘pro se’. LashL’s putting together a nice page of all the documents found so far. Go read [http://simpsonlitigation.googlepages.com/home](http://simpsonlitigation.googlepages.com/home) for more fun and games. So far, every claim he makes that has been investigated has turned out to be false. A perfect track record so far. > [@](#): > > Now, I wonder if this forum’s going to be as fun as the JREF’s. Please don’t dissapoint 😃 Dude, this forum is more fun than _two_ barrels of psychedelic, paranormal monkeys, you bet. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/50 "2007-12-05T22:25:14Z")
😕 “Corn Gods”?! Do they communicate through crop circles? ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [December 5, 2007, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/51 "2007-12-05T22:33:03Z")
[crank.net](http://www.crank.net/et.html) gives ET Corn Gods a “Crankiest” rating . . . at least it’s not “Illucid.” ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2007, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/52 "2007-12-06T14:48:27Z")
[QUOTE=BrainGlutton] 😕 “Corn Gods”?! Do they communicate through crop circles? [/QUOTE] No, cornholes. ---
**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2007, 2:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/53 "2007-12-06T14:58:47Z")
[QUOTE=Musicat] No, cornholes. [/QUOTE] So to make this lawsuit go away, all he needs is some TP for his bunghole? Oh, and a new pair of pants, of course. ---
**Author:** ![Mellivora\_capensis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8797f3/32.png) [@Mellivora\_capensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mellivora_capensis)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2007, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/54 "2007-12-06T15:29:13Z")
Welcome **fugitive-from-simpson** , hope you stick around. Alternatively, you can buy a round. I’ll have a creme soda. ---
**Author:** ![PetW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@PetW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PetW)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2007, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/55 "2007-12-06T18:01:06Z")
OK Well I went to one of Mr. Simpson’s websites, where he lists his phone number. I gave him a call through a relay service (where you type and an operator reads it aloud to him, then types his response back.) It was an amusing call, he eventually told me to go to hell and hung up. I made fun of him with the operator afterwards and she thanked me for brightening her day. ---
**Author:** ![RMutt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e19b73/32.png) [@RMutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RMutt)\ **Post date:** [December 6, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/56 "2007-12-06T18:29:12Z")
I’m sad that I can’t check out his site from here at work, but it’s blocked. My employer (the US Air Force), blocks it with the reason that it’s “humor.” Hmm, maybe the military is sharper than they appear… ---
**Author:** ![fugitive-from-simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/0ea827/32.png) [@fugitive-from-simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fugitive-from-simpson)\ **Post date:** [December 18, 2007, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/57 "2007-12-18T17:13:21Z")
[QUOTE=PetW] I made fun of him with the operator afterwards and she thanked me for brightening her day. [/QUOTE] any chance of brightening our day with a transcript 😃 ---
**Author:** ![PetW](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d2c977/32.png) [@PetW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PetW)\ **Post date:** [December 19, 2007, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684/58 "2007-12-19T03:02:42Z")
Sorry, it’s long gone now. Nothing really that interesting, I was planning on being nice to him most of the time and not make him think I was just fucking with him. I asked some questions about whether his system was a game or an actual translation tool (apparently it’s both.) The highlight of the conversation: throughout everything he assumed I was female since the operator I was using happened to be female, so I decided to go with it and subtly hit on him. Eventually I go: “Are you single?” “No” “Are you the single most retarded person I’ve ever talked to?” “Tell him/her to go to hell” (hangs up) Opr: Would you like to place a call? Me: Damn, I was hoping to learn the secrets of the universe. Hope that brightened your day! Opr: (Smile) thank u End of conversation. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/move-over-geller-geo-simpson-major-pistachio-sues-everyone-in-sight/428684.md?page=2)