# Movie actresses you got the wrong idea about based only on their titties **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [October 10, 2008, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387 "2008-10-10T22:42:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 10:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/1 "2008-10-10T22:42:17Z")
I thought Jessica Lange was a total bimbo slut whore no-talent piece of ass eye candy when I first saw her in KING KONG, but a few years later I saw FRANCES, probably the most powerful acting job I can remember offhand, and I was totally blown away by her performance in TOOTSIE. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2008, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/2 "2008-10-10T23:31:33Z")
It wasn’t her titties - fine as they were - it was the fact that Lange’s role was playing an untalented starlet. Many people assumed it was typecasting rather than good acting and dismissed her. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/3 "2008-10-11T00:58:45Z")
well, that and the fact that the photo spread for King Komng in Time magazine, of all places, showed her bare breast (something that _wasn’t_ in the movie. Damned teases!) ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/4 "2008-10-11T01:10:31Z")
Both hands on the keyboard, **Cal**. ---
**Author:** ![Cuckoorex](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ad7895/32.png) [@Cuckoorex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cuckoorex)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/5 "2008-10-11T02:08:07Z")
I only clicked on the thread because it had the word “titties” in the title. I guess if the intent was to get people to name actresses that, at first glance, seem to be only eye candy, but can actually act, then I’d say maybe Salma Hayek, although to be fair, to this day I can’t fairly rate her acting ability because whenever she’s onscreen I’m reduced to a drooling puddle of lust. ---
**Author:** ![torie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/77aa72/32.png) [@torie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/torie)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/6 "2008-10-11T04:30:53Z")
> [@Cuckoorex](#): > > I only clicked on the thread because it had the word “titties” in the title. > > I guess if the intent was to get people to name actresses that, at first glance, seem to be only eye candy, but can actually act, then I’d say maybe Salma Hayek, although to be fair, to this day I can’t fairly rate her acting ability because whenever she’s onscreen I’m reduced to a drooling puddle of lust. I loved _Frida_. She was excellent. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/7 "2008-10-11T04:42:15Z")
**Charlize Theron** was just a stunning blonde babe with a nice rack in skin-tight clothes who got in an awesome knock-down drag-out fight with Teri Hatcher in _2 Days in the Valley_. She’s obviously proven since that she can act. ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 4:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/8 "2008-10-11T04:45:52Z")
> [@torie](#): > > I loved _Frida_. She was excellent. Yeah, but how were her tits? 😃 Is it inappropriate to cite Kiera Knightley’s, er, ample enough by my lights bosom as sufficient distraction from her talent for this thread because she doesn’t have bazombas? How about Jennifer Love Hewitt? No, wait, hers are the sum total of her acting ability. Okay, I’ll try again. Not really an actress, but how about Dolly Parton? My God in Heaven, that woman can sing, but she’s a walking boob joke. Both meanings of boob. Same with Charo. A goddess of the guitar (two-time winner of Guitar Player’s “best flamenco guitarist” award–you should hear her!), but makes a living as a cartoon. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 5:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/9 "2008-10-11T05:37:18Z")
Katherine Heigl a) has a rack I would do heinous and unspeakable things for, b) can pull out the acting chops on occasion (not always, but she’s had some good moments). ---
**Author:** ![gladtobeblazed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/85f322/32.png) [@gladtobeblazed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gladtobeblazed)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/10 "2008-10-11T07:07:43Z")
Helen Mirren was quite attractive back in her day, and she’s a rather fine actress as well. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/11 "2008-10-11T07:38:19Z")
> [@gladtobeblazed](#): > > Helen Mirren was quite attractive back in her day, and she’s a rather fine actress as well. :dubious: [“Back in the day?”](http://www.examiner.com/x-276-Internet-Buzz-Examiner~topic10472-Helen-Mirren) ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 7:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/12 "2008-10-11T07:52:17Z")
Raquel Welch is actually very intelligent, and she isn’t stuck up like many in her position would be. I was working my way through college working Security and she actually spent about 15 minutes chatting with me about Marine Biology. ---
**Author:** ![Student\_Driver](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3da27b/32.png) [@Student\_Driver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Student_Driver)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 9:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/13 "2008-10-11T09:32:23Z")
Ludivine Sagnier. I’m _still_ not sure if she’s a good actress or not, because I just end up leering at her every time she’s in a movie (helps that she’s usually naked in them). ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/14 "2008-10-11T17:43:06Z")
> [@Cuckoorex](#): > > I guess if the intent was to get people to name actresses that, at first glance, seem to be only eye candy, but can actually act, then I’d say maybe Salma Hayek. Yes, that was the intent, and I like the choices named: Theron and Hayek are both very sweet to gaze over, but where should I look to see any fine acting? I’ve seen some pretty bad roles for each of them–what’s good? Curiously, I was just doing a little fleamarketing, where I bought a DVD of Lange’s KING KONG for 3 bucks. The whole marketing campaign for that movie seemed built around her hot body and good looks in general, though I plead guilty to being 23 at the time and aware of very little information that I didn’t receive directly through my hormones. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/15 "2008-10-11T17:49:31Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Yes, that was the intent, and I like the choices named: Theron and Hayek are both very sweet to gaze over, but where should I look to see any fine acting? I’ve seen some pretty bad roles for each of them–what’s good? Theron won an Academy Award for her terrific performance in _Monster_. I also liked her in _The Cider House Rules_ and I haven’t seen _North Country_, but I’ve heard she’se very good in it. It’s true that she hasn’t been in many great movies, though. ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/16 "2008-10-11T18:11:42Z")
Hmmm, I actually own the DVD of MONSTER, have been meaning to watch it someday. Thanks for the reminder. Is anyone willing to recommend strongly absolute knockout performances by Angelina Jolie, Penelope Cruz, Demi Moore, Halle Berry? I know they’ve all done star turns in major pictures, and won acting awards, and all that but off the top of my head, I can’t think of any single performance that blew me away, not like TOOTSIE or FRANCES. Or how about some of the models that have gone into acting, obviously choosing that career (or having it chosen for them) primarily on the basis of eye candy, not thespic talents. Anyone ever seen a deeply moving perfomance by Faye Dunaway, Isabella Rosselini, or another ex-model turned actress? ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/17 "2008-10-11T18:32:53Z")
> [@Kythereia](#): > > Katherine Heigl > > a) has a rack I would do heinous and unspeakable things for, > > b) can pull out the acting chops on occasion (not always, but she’s had some good moments). I was flipping through channels the other day and had to consult IMDb to assure myself that, yes, that is her delectably underage self in _Under Siege 2: Dark Territory_. God. Damn. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/18 "2008-10-11T18:43:40Z")
> [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](#): > > Yes, that was the intent, and I like the choices named: Theron and Hayek are both very sweet to gaze over, but where should I look to see any fine acting? I’ve seen some pretty bad roles for each of them–what’s good? [My thoughts on Charlize Theron as an actress](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=483592). (FTR, I have no opinion about her as a piece of ass.) ---
**Author:** ![pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@pseudotriton\_ruber\_ruber](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pseudotriton_ruber_ruber)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/19 "2008-10-11T19:12:20Z")
Nice thread, Twix. Wonder where I was when that appeared. BTW, folks, FTR, and not that it needs saying, but I’m saying that this thread began as a weak and lame parody of “Movies you got the wrong idea about based only on the titles.” ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2008, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387/20 "2008-10-11T19:29:40Z")
[QUOTE=pseudotriton ruber ruber] Angelina Jolie [/QUOTE] [Girl, interrupted.](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0172493/)Jolie won an Academy Award. [QUOTE=pseudotriton ruber ruber] Penelope Cruz [/QUOTE] [Volver.](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0441909/) Or any other title by Almodóvar. Her acting gets restricted when she’s talking English. Her range is much better in Spanish. [QUOTE=pseudotriton ruber ruber] Demi Moore [/QUOTE] [Blame it on Rio.](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086973/) Not for her acting though. Checking her IMDb bio, I see that she’s born in Roswell, NM. Hmmm… [QUOTE=pseudotriton ruber ruber] Halle Berry [/QUOTE] Her Oscar for [Monster’s Ball](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0285742/) was well deserved, IMO. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-actresses-you-got-the-wrong-idea-about-based-only-on-their-titties/467387.md?page=2)