# Movie contrivances that annoy. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 3, 2014, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911 "2014-06-03T12:03:55Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/21 "2014-06-03T20:10:59Z")
Guessing someone’s password, especially when lives are imminently in danger. This one kills me. The Good Guy IT Expert sits down at a computer in the bad guy’s lair, a bad guy with considerable techie knowledge, and encounters a login screen. Damn! they need a password! :smack: The other Good Guy who isn’t the least bit techie, glances around the room and sees a photograph of the Bad Guy’s graduating class/ pet dog/Grandmother and says, “Try this: _LincolnHighRexNana_,” and of course, it’s the password. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![AnthonyElite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b487fb/32.png) [@AnthonyElite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AnthonyElite)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/22 "2014-06-03T20:33:06Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Guessing someone’s password, especially when lives are imminently in danger. This one kills me. > > The Good Guy IT Expert sits down at a computer in the bad guy’s lair, a bad guy with considerable techie knowledge, and encounters a login screen. Damn! they need a password! :smack: > > The other Good Guy who isn’t the least bit techie, glances around the room and sees a photograph of the Bad Guy’s graduating class/ pet dog/Grandmother and says, “Try this: _LincolnHighRexNana_,” and of course, it’s the password. :rolleyes: Right? And almost all passwords now require at least 1 number and at least 1 capitalization. So how do they know it isn’t L1ncolnHighRexNanA? I hate when a plot could EASILY come up with an excuse for something, but instead the writers get lazy. There’s a killer after us “let’s split up.” Ummm…what? Bullshit, no one would split up. Just make a plot reason for the split up - the killer separates them, an obstacle can only be surmounted by one and they have to hit a switch, yada-yada. But don’t insult me with the “let’s split up” line…it just makes me think the characters are idiots. ---
**Author:** ![Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Springtime_for_Spacers)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/23 "2014-06-03T21:01:05Z")
> [@BobLibDem](#): > > Or that the computers beep every time they do anything. > > I nominate every fight scene- it must appear that the hero is just about to lose before he heroically defies the odds and vanquishes his near-oppressor. How about the hero kicks the villain’s ass in 10 seconds, tops? Or the other way around? > > Or for that matter every sporting event has to be decided in the bottom of the 9th inning or in the last 0.1 seconds of time on the clock, preferably by a foul being called or penalty shot awarded or such. The big game is never a blowout. > > Then there’s the cows must moo/horses must whinny/cats must yowl when they first appear on screen. God yes, that stupid pointless miaow, just in case you were in doubt that it is a cat. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/24 "2014-06-03T21:17:18Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#): > > Outrunning explosions, especially nuclear ones. Especially in refrigerators rolling downhill. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/25 "2014-06-03T21:34:14Z")
Another one: offering someone a glass of water, the universal panacea (is that redundant?) in all situations, no matter what the tragic circumstances, as if water will cure 3rd degree burns, heroin withdrawal (or heroine withdrawal), losing your house in a fire, being in a plane crash, or just finding out that your spouse has run off with your parent. Also, asking “Are you okay?” when a person has just suffered one of the tragedies noted above. And worse–when the wounded person answers, “I’m fine,” when they’re practically bleeding to death. Yet another: in police shows, people refusing to see therapists because “I’m not crazy!” I got a million of 'em. ---
**Author:** ![Poysyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Poysyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Poysyn)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/26 "2014-06-03T21:40:29Z")
I hate it when the cops are just about to catch someone and they yell “Police, FREEZE!” and now they have a long chase. How about next time, don’t announce you are there when you are still across the street? And almost everything that happens when they bring in the military. AHHH! I just sit there, silently seething, because I don’t like ruining it for everyone else, but even the little things (can you at least TRY to get the uniform right, TRY?) grate. ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/27 "2014-06-03T21:43:47Z")
Nothing specific for me, just that script that has a decent setup and decent characters, but _something_ has to happen in the third act. There has to be an actual movie, or characters have to complete their arc, or whatever. All too often the occurance makes no sense or is wildly out of character for the people in the story. For example, Drinking Buddies has the two leads abruptly change personality and eventually get into an obviously arbitrary argument just to fill out the run time and have something to resolve at the end. (That’s not the only awful thing that irritates me just thinking of that movie.) ---
**Author:** ![Joey\_P](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/919ad9/32.png) [@Joey\_P](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Joey_P)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/28 "2014-06-03T21:46:02Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > The other Good Guy who isn’t the least bit techie, glances around the room and sees a photograph of the Bad Guy’s graduating class/ pet dog/Grandmother and says, “Try this: _LincolnHighRexNana_,” and of course, it’s the password. :rolleyes: > [@AnthonyElite](#): > > Right? And almost all passwords now require at least 1 number and at least 1 capitalization. So how do they know it isn’t L1ncolnHighRexNanA? Or if they want to add some comedy it’ll be “LincolnHighRexNana” [wait, she swears alot] “[FuckingLincolnHighRexNana](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdzn4X26Ids)” ---
**Author:** ![Private\_Public](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3ab097/32.png) [@Private\_Public](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Private_Public)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 9:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/29 "2014-06-03T21:48:37Z")
A couple of my movie pet peeves… Movies that show a submarine underwater, and you can hear the sonar ping. As someone who served on a submarine in the Navy, that just drives me crazy. Anytime there are cop cars or firetrucks at a scene, the siren or horn is sounded. Really? By the looks of things, I did not know we were at some crime/fire/accident scene. ---
**Author:** ![Battle\_Pope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4bbf92/32.png) [@Battle\_Pope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Battle_Pope)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/30 "2014-06-03T22:15:45Z")
> [@Poysyn](#): > > I hate it when the cops are just about to catch someone and they yell “Police, FREEZE!” and now they have a long chase. How about next time, don’t announce you are there when you are still across the street? Add to this the police/FBI etc arriving at any situation with lights flashing, sirens blaring and a screach of brakes - alerting every criminal in a 4 block radius that something is going down. I wonder how many TV shows could have been shortened by 20 minutes if the cops had just driven up to the criminals house slowly and quietly . 😃 Any cop or soldier that mentions their retirement/engagement/wedding/new baby will have a 99%\*\* chance of getting killed during the 2nd act of the movie. \*\*The other 1% being Danny Glover in the \*Lethal Weapon \*movies ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/31 "2014-06-03T22:22:33Z")
Another few that annoy me: [ul][li] Sprinklers. Hero holds a lighter up to one sprinkler in a building - they all go off, everywhere in the building. No, they do not - each sprinkler head is designed to only go off when the glass around that individual head’s sensor breaks due to the heat. IOW, if you hold a lighter up to one sprinkler head, **only that one** will go off. There also isn’t enough pressure in those pipes to have them all spray like Gene Kelly is going to start dancing. Finally, that water will be filthy, not like the Evian spray you see in the movie.[/li][li]Character says something dramatic while backs away into the street, is hit by a bus. That’s super shocking and everything, but who are these bus drivers that don’t even hit the brakes, slow down, swerve, or even honk?! What the hell runs through their mind - “That kid looks like she’s going to back off the sidewalk right into my lane…yep - there she goes! Well, that’s a shame.” ::ka-thunk ka-thunk::[/li]Can we all sign a petition or something to let Hollywood know that if a character survives a gunshot, he/she was wearing a vest? Seriously, we **no longer** need the scene of said character pulling apart their shirt to show the vest underneath and the shiny pancaked bullets. For reals. We get it. A simple “I was wearing a vest” is fine.[/ul] ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 10:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/32 "2014-06-03T22:35:03Z")
Parent bundling child into car ALWAYS says, “We’re going to be late!” Sometimes, for a change of pace, “We’re late!” Person (usually a woman) searching frantically for a ringing cell phone. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/33 "2014-06-03T22:38:06Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > Headquartered in Manhattan with offices in every major city across the globe, this company has cabs on every corner just waiting for you to jump in and yell “Follow that car!” All the drivers willing to speed and weave through city traffic at your behest. [And they employ some of the dumbest people.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9DNOqvOmOc) The contrivance that bugs me the most, just because it is so ubiquitous, is the set-up in which Character A has unwittingly done something that will in the near future negatively affect Character B (who is usually A’s SO.) Character B is unaware of what has already occurred and exchanges banal pleasantries with A. At which point, we hear some variation on the following exchange: Character A: Honey…there’s something I have to tell you. Character B: Yes, dear? What is it? Character A: (Pause) Nothing. And Character A strolls off, blithely unaware this her/his life is about to be upended. Just once, JUST ONCE, I’d like to see Character B say “No tell me, what is it?” Or (God forbid) Character A confess what really happened. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/34 "2014-06-03T22:40:06Z")
There may be some truth to this, but: Conan pulls his 6 foot sword out of his leather scabbard and the sword goes, “Zzzhhhiiinnnnnnnggg.” I’ve seen that done with hedge clippers, too. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/35 "2014-06-03T22:46:40Z")
Windows never have screens and are thus always available as a secondary (possibly sneaky) entrance/exit. I’ve never been in a house that didn’t have screens on every single window that opened (and it’s rarely easy to get the screens open to allow egress). And I’ve been in a lot of houses. Yet screens don’t exist in whatever alternate world Hollywood (or Vancouver, whatever) seems to think exists. ---
**Author:** ![monstro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba9def/32.png) [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/36 "2014-06-03T23:06:09Z")
When the man tells the woman to stay behind in the cop car, you know that two things are going to happen. 1) He’s about to tangle with the bad guys, usually in an abandoned warehouse with water dripping from the ceiling and 2) the woman is going to save his life by shooting the bad guy at the last minute. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/37 "2014-06-03T23:09:26Z")
> [@dracoi](#): > > If the evil bad guy is prophesied to arise at midnight, not only is midnight always in local time, but every clock or watch in the movie is synchronized down to the second. The freaking bad guys even respect daylight savings time! > > Bombs are the same way. If a bomb is going off at noon, then everyone in town can tell the exact second of detonation by looking at the most convenient clock. Someone in another thread pointed out that these days, with no one wearing watches anymore, and the time keeping devices in our phones, computers, music players, cars, stovetops and various dingle-dongles all connecting to the internet and pinging the same atomic clock, we \*are \*all synchronized down to the second. You just never hear the excuse “oh, but by \*my \*watch I’m five minutes early” anymore. Presumably the evil bad guy has an iPhone, too. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/38 "2014-06-03T23:49:06Z")
> [@TBG](#): > > Windows never have screens and are thus always available as a secondary (possibly sneaky) entrance/exit. > > I’ve never been in a house that didn’t have screens on every single window that opened (and it’s rarely easy to get the screens open to allow egress). And I’ve been in a lot of houses. Yet screens don’t exist in whatever alternate world Hollywood (or Vancouver, whatever) seems to think exists. This. Absolutely. And what about the number of times people escape by climbing out of the windows in public bathrooms? > [@monstro](#): > > When the man tells the woman to stay behind in the cop car, you know that two things are going to happen. 1) He’s about to tangle with the bad guys, usually in an abandoned warehouse with water dripping from the ceiling and 2) the woman is going to save his life by shooting the bad guy at the last minute. Or she will follow and trip and fall. What about people moving dead bodies, esp. small women moving big dead guys? And changing the clothes on dead bodies? And digging holes big enough to bury dead bodies? It’s not even easy to lift a sleeping dog, or to dig a big enough hole to bury a cat or dog. Also, when two cops are questioning someone, the cell phone of one of them will ALWAYS ring, that person will leave the room to take the call, and will come back and say, “We have to go. Now!” ---
**Author:** ![Bozuit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/edb3f5/32.png) [@Bozuit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bozuit)\ **Post date:** [June 3, 2014, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/39 "2014-06-03T23:57:53Z")
> [@glee](#): > > It’s a one-off, but although Avatar was spectacular viewing, I am appalled at the valuable substance being called ‘unobtainium’. > They really couldn’t think of a better name? :smack: If it helps, “unobtainium” [was already a thing](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unobtainium). > [@JohnGalt](#): > > “Run! Run! Run!” - gets yelled in just about every action movie. When playing computer games with a friend I sometimes find myself giving such gratuitous advice. I couldn’t promise I wouldn’t do the same in real life. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [June 4, 2014, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911/40 "2014-06-04T00:18:17Z")
Bad guy about to enter the room or bomb about to go off. Anyways the couple (always hero and lady in distress) have less than 30 seconds to get out. Cue 5 minute exposition. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/movie-contrivances-that-annoy/689911.md?page=3)